The Girl on the Boat - Penn State University

“Don’t do it!” said Eustace Hignett solemnly. “As a
friend I entreat you not to do it. Take my advice, as a
man who knows women, and don’t do it!”
“Don’t do what?”
“Propose to her. I can tell by the glitter in your eye
that you are intending to propose to this girl—probably
this morning.”
“Not this morning—after lunch. I always think one
can do oneself more justice after lunch.”
“Don’t do it. Women are the devil, whether they
marry you or jilt you. Do you realise that women wear
black evening dresses that have to be hooked up in a
hurry when you are late for the theatre, and that, out
of sheer wanton malignity, the hooks and eyes on those
dresses are also made black? Do you realise …?”
“Oh, I’ve thought it all out.”
“And take the matter of children. How would you
like to become the father—and a mere glance around
you will show you that the chances are enormously in
favour of such a thing happening—of a boy with spectacles
and protruding front teeth who asks questions
<strong>The</strong> <strong>Girl</strong> on the Boat
48
all the time? Out of six small boys whom I saw when I
came on board, four wore spectacles and had teeth
like rabbits. <strong>The</strong> other two were equally revolting in
different styles. How would you like to become the
father …?”
“<strong>The</strong>re is no need to be indelicate,” said Sam stiffly.
“A man must take these chances.”
“Give her the miss in baulk,” pleaded Hignett. “Stay
down here for the rest of the voyage. You can easily
dodge her when you get to Southampton. And, if she
sends messages, say you’re ill and can’t be disturbed.”
Sam gazed at him, revolted. More than ever he began
to understand how it was that a girl with ideals
had broken off her engagement with this man. He finished
dressing, and, after a satisfying breakfast, went
on deck.
2
IT WAS, as he had said, a glorious morning. <strong>The</strong> sample