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178 THE ADVENTURES OP PHILIP
vacant. The Doctor does not care to use that room. I remember
now how silent they were when together, and how terrified she
always seemed before him. What has he done ? I know of one
affair in his early life. Does this Hunt know of any more ? They
have been accomplices in some conspiracy, sir; I daresay with
that young Cinqbars, of whom Hunt is for ever bragging: the
worthy son of the worthy Ringwood. I say, does wickedness run
in the blood ? My grandfathers, I have heard, were honest men.
Perhaps they were only not found out ; and the family taint will
show in me some day. There are times when I feel the devil so
strong within me, that I think some day he must have the mastery.
I'm not quite bad yet : but I tremble lest I should go. Suppose I
were to drown, and go down ? It's not a jolly thing, Pendennis, to
have such a father as mine. Don't humbug me with your charitable
palliations and soothing surmises. You put me in mind of the
world then, by Jove, you do ! I laugh, and I drink, and I make
merry, and sing, and smoke endless tobacco; and I tell you, I
always feel as if a little sword was dangling over my skull which
will fall some day and split it. Old Parr Street is mined, sir,—
mined ! And some morning we shall be blown into blazes—into
blazes, sir ; mark my words ! That's why I'm so careless and so
idle, for which you fellows are always bothering and scolding me.
There's no use in settling down until the explosion is over, don't
you see ? Incedo per ignes suppositos, and, by George ! sir, I feel
my boot-soles already scorching. Poor thing ! poor mother" (he
apostrophised his mother's picture which hung in the room where
we were talking), " were you aware of the secret, and was it the
knowledge of that which made your poor eyes always look so
frightened ? She was always fond of you, Pen. Do you remember
how pretty and graceful she used to look as she lay on her sofa
upstairs, or smiled out of her carriage as she kissed her hand to us
boys ? I say, what if a woman marries, and is coaxed and wheedled
by a soft tongue, and runs off, and afterwards finds her husband
has a cloven foot ?"
"Ah, Philip!"
" What is to be the lot of the son of such a man 1 Is my
hoof cloven, too ?" It was on the stove, as he talked, extended
in American fashion. "Suppose there's no escape for me, and I
inherit my doom, as another man does gout or consumption?
Knowing this fate, what is the use, then, of doing anything in
particular ? I tell you, sir, the whole edifice of our present life will
crumble in and smash." (Here he flings his pipe to the ground
with an awful shatter.) " And until the catastrophe comes, what
on earth is the use of setting to work, as you call it 1 You might