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ON HIS WAY THROUGH THE WORLD 593
the house and laughing and cooing with the children, by Jove.
She's not aware of anything. She does not know how dreadfully
the res domi is squeezing me. But before marriage she did, I toll
you. Then, if anything annoyed me, she divined it. If I felt ever
so little unwell, you should have seen the alarm on her face ! It
was * Philip dear, how pale you are ;' or, ' Philip, how flushed you
are ;' or, ' I am sure you have had a letter from your father. Why
do you conceal anything from me, sir ? You never should—never !'
And now when the fox is gnawing at my side under my cloak, I
laugh and grin so naturally that she believes I am all right, and
she comes to meet me flouncing the children about in my face, and
wearing an air of consummate happiness ! I would not deceive her
for the world, you know. But it's mortifying. Don't tell me. It
is mortifying to be tossing awake all night, and racked with care
all day, and have the wife of your bosom chattering and singing
and laughing, as if there were no cares, or doubts, or duns in the
world. If I had the gout and she were to laugh and sing, I should
not call that sympathy. If I were arrested for debt, and she were
to come grinning and laughing to the spunging-house, I should not
call that consolation. Why doesn't she feel ? She ought to feel.
There's Betsy, our parlour-maid. There's the old fellow who comes
to clean the boots and knives. They know how hard up I am.
And my wife sings and dances whilst I am on the verge of ruin, by
Jove ; and giggles and laughs as if life was a pantomime !"
Then the man and woman into whose ears poor Philip roared
out his confessions and griefs, hung down their blushing heads in
humbled silence. They are tolerably prosperous in life, and, I fear,
are pretty well satisfied with themselves and each other. A woman
who scarcely ever does any wrong, and rules and governs her own
house and family, as my ________ as the wife of the reader's humble
servant most notoriously does, often becomes—must it be said ?—
too certain of her own virtue, and is too sure of the correctness
of her own opinion. We virtuous people give advice a good
deal, and set a considerable value upon that advice. We meet
a certain man who has fallen among thieves, let us say. We
succour him readily enough. We take him kindly to the inn,
and pay his score there ; but we say to the landlord, " You must
give this poor man his bed ; his medicine at such a time, and his
broth at such another. But, mind you, he must have that physic,
and no other; that broth when we order it. We take his case
in hand, you understand. Don't listen to him or anybody else.
We know all about everything. Good-bye. Take care of him.
Mind the medicine and the broth !" And Mr. Benefactor or Lady
Bountiful goes away, perfectly self-satisfied.
11 2 P