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y Addison DeWitt
You know Barbra, Devina,
TC and Angela. Miss Ebony, Felicia,
Mya and Kiki. But does anyone recall
... the most famous drag queen of
impersonation eagerly await the historic
return of The one. The only.
Putty!
Background story: Once upon a time in
the last millennium of the last decade of
the last century, the fabled, now longdefunct
cocktail lounge of Wink’s not
only serving booze, but shoveling out
pounds of cocaine in the restroom, too.
Oh, now just relax. Like nobody knew.
They’ve been closed for years now and
the statue of limitations has run out, so
I’m pretty sure that I can’t be sued for
libel. I hope. Back then Wink’s was the
roost of drag queens like the lovable,
toothless old heifer Tish Tanner (RIP)
and others.
and enormously entertaining Putty,
who’s charisma and onstage antics turn
men into convulsing, spitting, pigs. I’ve
seen it happen. Celia hits the stage in
September, and I can’t wait. So mark
your calenders, dearies! This’ll be an
appearance you won’t want to miss!
AN OPEN LETTER TO ALL GO-GO
It pains me
to say this. No it doesn’t. Not really.
Kids, spit out your chewing gum before
you get up on the Boy Boxes or start
swinging on the brass pole. I’m tired of
watching you up there chomping away
on your Hubba-Bubba Bubble Gum like
a cow chewing its cud. It doesn’t make
you look sexy, it just makes you look
cheap and slutty. And I know you don’t
want to come across like that, now do
you? (But you can come across my face
anytime. I can’t believe I just said that.
Yes I can.) But unless you want me to
name names, stop it. Now. Thank you.
About ten years ago the rumor mill
reported that the late Putty’s foamrubber
padded body was allegedly
discovered in the Arizona Canal
when actually she was sold
into white slavery and the
sex trade in the Black Hole
of Calcutta-slash-Palm
Springs. Some fascinating
videos recounting Putty’s
desperate days were
produced. I’ve seen ‘em,
too, folks, and hoo-boy!
Who knew the sex trade
was so much fun?
Now the town’s a-buzz,
heralding the return of
the talented, ravishing,
94 WWW.IONAZ.COM June 2010 June 2010 WWW.IONAZ.COM 95