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Fall 2011 - The University of Scranton

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STEPH<br />

Funny. What happened to his face?<br />

HALE<br />

Some crazed barber pulled out a razor and mugged him. A tragedy really.<br />

May he rest in peace.<br />

STEPH<br />

Or in pieces, if you keep cutting him.<br />

HALE<br />

Piggs wanted a shave.<br />

STEPH<br />

(Takes the razor) And you?<br />

HALE<br />

No, I don’t need a shave (takes it back). I need the obituary.<br />

STEPH<br />

You’re dead if the viewing’s tomorrow.<br />

HALE<br />

But if I die, who’ll embalm me?<br />

STEPH<br />

I’d much rather scorch that grin <strong>of</strong>f and stuff you into a pretty vase.<br />

Hale chuckles and leans in to kiss her. She<br />

lets him, wrapping her arms around his neck,<br />

enjoying it for a brief moment before suddenly<br />

pulling back—feeling someone’s presence. She<br />

looks down at Mr. Piggy’s barren skin and his<br />

receding hair.<br />

32

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