March/April 2013 - Pershore High School

English
Gifted & Talented In English
Just a sample of the best pieces produced
this term. Well done!
A FOCUS ON
YEAR 8 & 9
AND THEIR
CREATIVE
WRITING
No 13 Graveyard Road by
Oliver Morgan.
… They neared the
inmidang building ,
trying to hide their fear and
huge goose bumps on their
skin. Windows were
boarded up and ghostly
graffi and vandalism
covered the large, crooked
house. Slowly and carefully
they knocked on the front
door. Knock, knock, knock.
No answer, phew! Gingerly,
they used their experse
stealth skills to silently
enter the house. Isolaon
reined supreme….
I love the way you’ve used
a variety of sentence
structures here Emmie
Excellent use of acve verbs
to engage the reader too—
wow!
Extract from, The Deserted House by Emmie Bewley.
The wind crashed and howled. The sky turned charcoal
black and spears of white lightening shot from the sky.
Cathy and I ran, wherever we could… anywhere to get
away. We had all heard how you could get struck by
lightening in an open field. We had to get out of the open,
and get under cover.
In the distance, I caught a glimpse of an old run‐down
house.
“QUICK, RUN!” I shouted. I sprinted for all I was worth and
Cathy (my best friend) dashed aer me. We reached the
house. It had no drive...
Excellent use of emove
vocabulary, helps to set the
scene for the reader
You’ve created tension
very well here and your
vocabulary is equally
expressive.
A Night to Remember (Titanic Diary entry) by Sarah Croy.
I can sll hear the screams and shouts. The cries of innocent children are sll ringing
in my ears, and I can sll picture the faces of the petrified third class passengers…
their faces sff with fear. What is it that makes the different classes so different,
who really cares about the amount of money people have when we are all in the
same posion
You’ve created a real sense of
panic from that dreadful night
Charloe, parcularly with the
short exclamatory sentences.
A Night to Remember (Titanic Diary Entry) by Charloe Bradley.
Screaming. Why can I hear screaming What on earth is all this noise
What’s happening Oh gosh, I think the boat is sinking! I’ve got to get
out I don’t want to die! Panic everywhere. Everyone’s running. Which
way do I go What do I do! I need to get to the lifeboats! Oh no, wait,
my children! I’ve got to get my children! The ship’s lng. I can’t stay
here! I need to get out! Which way do I go I can’t see anything; there’s
too many people! Help me, somebody!
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