edgar-mitchell

Sea of Sky 41
Nobody had ever been to the moon. The combined task was to be flawless
if possible, yet to have an escape hatch in place for when the unexpected
presented itself. The degree of peril we faced was reduced to a number
representing the probability that a series of critical parts would fail simultaneously.
Numbers have a way of quelling fearful emotions, when we
believe them. And they are hard to dispute even when you don’t.
Our inner sensations were an eclectic mixture: the urge to climb a
mountain just because it is there, and the simple desire to leave the world
a better and broader place. In the face of our loss, it was still possible for
me to imagine what Admiral Byrd sought while preparing to explore the
sea of ice smothering the earth’s poles, or what Columbus had in mind
while charting what had yet to be charted. But more importantly, I began
to see the larger project as but a sequence in the natural progression of
civilization, which would eventually take us into the cosmos at large. NASA
and its individual members were a part of the evolutionary process of
humankind, a significant cog in the machine that would take us to other
worlds. The people around me would be the first of our species to explore
these new landscapes; Ed, Roger, and Gus were a part of this process as
well, even in death. Though the idea was conceived for political advantage,
going to the moon seemed fundamental in making the next step in
discovering more about ourselves and the universe. We would not only
take the first steps in this process, but also learn more about from whence
we came by studying the mysterious world that had orbited our own for
billions of years.
What I was interested in, and what everyone at some point in his or
her life wonders about, is the origin of our existence, the grand question
of how we came to be. We want to know if our existence has any larger
purpose, and if so, just what it is. Human beings have pondered these
questions ever since they were capable of any sort of meaningful contemplation.
Ultimately, this was the impetus behind the Mercury, Gemini, and
Apollo missions. These programs existed because Americans thought they
might yield answers, and they were willing to pay millions of dollars to
find out.
Irrespective of the individual motivation to be a part of the Apollo
Program, each of its members were irresistibly drawn to the extraordinary
adventure. It was understood that our three compatriots would admonish
us, were we to abandon the larger project as a result of their death,
because from the beginning it seemed unlikely that a project of this magnitude
could be accomplished without loss of life.