nanopolitics handbook - Minor Compositions

The controlled body is constantly controlling other bodies – there is notime to go to the toilet when teaching.My gynaecologist speaks about the toilet as the place many women useas space for their legitimate withdrawal, to have a legitimate break from theirresponsibilities to others. Many women, so she has observed, develop bladderinfections in order to be able to claim their break time....Flu (first half term, i.e. first holiday) – most common teacher illness – everyonegets the flu, working with so many young people etc. - most likely teachersare getting ill in their holidays.Headaches (especially on Fridays) – on a regular basis. Never really had headachesbefore this training.A Friday note:‘teeth poppingstomach implodinghead pounding through my earsshoulders in agonybreasts burstingmade it through this week of REAL work?’I didn’t get ill after my first teaching month, not until the very end of theprogramme. That was equally scary. My body was in control. Functioning inorder to be controlling.I got wrist problems however, repetitive strain injuries in both wrists. Dueto intense tensions in my shoulders. And I realised when I was teaching I heldboth my hands as if I was pushing away an imaginary wall, or holding it fromfalling on me. One night I even woke up with an intense pain in my back – Irealised I was stemming both my hands into my hips as if telling someone off,in the middle of my sleep....the controlling body in control....The body of a teacher:...tells, doesn’t ask. The space for learning is organised by the teachermaking students follow rules we did not establish collectively....has no time to reflect. Plans – executes – assesses – progresses - evaluatesprogress – plans.... Time for reflection? Time for process?...does not look up. It is all-round looking, overseeing the bodies it controls,or at least it gives the impression it sees everything – hey wow, look,that’s a beautiful sky...?168