<strong>little</strong> <strong>eyes</strong>,<strong>little</strong> <strong>ears</strong>The need fordifferential response 2Interventions should ensuresafety and respect indivi<strong>du</strong>alneeds and differencesIn <strong>de</strong>vising an intervention strategy, service <strong>de</strong>liverersconsi<strong>de</strong>r the severity and frequency of violence, look forpower and control tactics, and ask about any other adverseexperiences affecting the children.Woman abuse is differentthan marital conflictWhile woman abuse can occur without physical assaults,re<strong>la</strong>tively minor inci<strong>de</strong>nts such as s<strong>la</strong>pping and pushing canoccur once or twice in re<strong>la</strong>tionships not otherwisecharacterized by coercive control tactics. 19The hallmark of woman abuseis coercive controlWoman abuse involves the ongoing, instrumental use ofcoercive control tactics against a woman by her partner tomeet his needs. Physical violence or the threat of it isoften present.The two are oftenconfused in researchThe boundaries between marital conflict and woman abusecan be blurred in general popu<strong>la</strong>tion surveys, minimizingthe true impact of woman abuse on a<strong>du</strong>lt victims and theirchildren. Also, symmetry between the rates of violencereported by men and women are likely to occur whensporadic violence within the context of marital conflict islumped together with the patterns of intimidation andthreat that characterize woman abuse.The type of interventionwill be differentCouple therapies appropriate for marital conflict areineffective for re<strong>la</strong>tionships characterized by woman abuseand may increase the risk faced by a woman and herchildren. Likewise, the reverse is true. Interventions<strong>de</strong>signed for male perpetrators of woman abuse are notappropriate to <strong>de</strong>al with marital conflict.Marital conflict is differentthan woman abuseMarital conflict may be part of an abusive re<strong>la</strong>tionship.However, marital conflict characterizes a substantialnumber of intimate re<strong>la</strong>tionships where one will not findwoman abuse.Judy Martin, John Langley & Jane Millichamp(2006). Domestic Violence as Witnessed byNew Zea<strong>la</strong>nd Children. New Zea<strong>la</strong>ndMedical Journal, 119: 1-14.32
how violence against a mother shapes children as they growExposure to woman abuseExposure to iso<strong>la</strong>ted/sporadicviolence in the context of severemarital conflictExposure to verbal marital conflictNo marital conflict, no violenceSurveys of the general popu<strong>la</strong>tionshow that most children grow upwith no violence in their home,some will see verbal conflict,some will see one or two acts ofphysical violence (probably in thecontext of marital conflict) andsome will live with woman abuse.The adversities of childhoodOther co-occurring challenges potentially affecting thechildren are i<strong>de</strong>ally consi<strong>de</strong>red in p<strong>la</strong>nning an interventionfor children.Adverse Childhood Experiences Study:www.acestudy.orgLarge-scale studies of childhood like the ACE Study helpus see that children who live with woman abuse willtypically face other challenges as well. The more frequentthe physical abuse of a mother in a family, the morelikely these are true:• The child is maltreated (emotional or physicalneglect, physical or sexual abuse, or emotional12, 14, 15, 23abuse) and subject to physical punishment.This is sometimes called poly-victimization ormultiple victimization.• TheAfamily experiences socio-economic hardship,unemployment, alcoholism, parental criminality,and/or the recent intro<strong>du</strong>ction or exo<strong>du</strong>s of9, 12, 14a parental figure.mother's ability to be the best parentshe can be may be compromised by theabuse and its emotional and financialconsequences. 2-For many children, this “package” of adversities willcompromise health, emotional well-being and aca<strong>de</strong>micsuccess, in the short and/or long term. Statistically,the effect app<strong>ears</strong> cumu<strong>la</strong>tive: the more types ofvictimization and adversities, the longer they <strong>la</strong>st,and the more severe they are, the more profoundis the ultimate effect.Children may also be “exposed” to violencein the media (like movies and music lyrics),in the news, on the p<strong>la</strong>y ground or in schoolcorridors, and some children are exposed toviolence in their neighbourhoods.33
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