Thich Nhat Hanh Jewish Roots The Better Way to Live Alone in the ...

monastic INSIGHT170 people), narrow and only one meter long each, because ourfood is simple and without much variety. We usually have rice atall three meals, with a stir-fry dish and a vegetable dish. There issoup at lunch, but sometimes we have just one dish. The sistersask to have rice, instead of noodle soup of some sorts, becausethey get hungry very quickly, and they cannot work or sleep wellat night.In the dining hall at Deer Park, there is a separate table fullof bottles and containers of soy sauce, olive oil, chilies, peanuts,sesame seeds, and so on. Here in Prajna, food is flavored withenough salt, and only occasionally there is a bowl of soy sauceor tomato sauce on the serving table (tomatoes are too expensivefor cooking). The shopping sisters also try to roast sesame for theSangha, but the jar is emptied so quickly that only two or threedays later we see another jar. In principle, we can talk after twosounds of the bell, but everyone remains silent throughout threemeals; some whisper if it’s very necessary to exchange something.I am happy with this, because that little tiny dining hall would belike an open market place if everyone talked.Before Sister Thoai Nghiem left Deer Park to return to Prajnathis last October, she told us that the sisters in Prajna crave sweets.Upon hearing this, some sisters thought that this craving for sweetswas due to them being teenagers. I myself thought it could bebecause they were malnourished. After a few days in Prajna, Ifound myself craving sweets as well! Sister Nhu Hieu shared thatthe other day she had a lollipop, and it tasted better than any candyshe had ever had in France! We both laughed together, because weare far from being teenagers. Each time when our brothers andsisters from Plum Village are together for a meeting, we bring allour sweets, place them on the table, and eat together. The truthis that none of us has the heart to enjoy these sweets alone, if wedon’t have enough to share with those in our room.Last week we had a meeting with the Venerable Abbot ofPrajna Temple, and he said he felt much love for us coming fromPlum Village, because we all become darker and thinner here.“Even brother Pháp Kham, who was fair and round when he firstarrived, now also looks so dark and thin!” (“He’s looking morelike a mountain person [a montagnard, mountain tribesman] now,”a sister whispered, and all of us giggled). “Well, we have givenseventy, eighty percent of ourselves, so we can give up to ninety,one hundred percent of ourselves. We just continue to stretch ourarms a little longer. So many people desperately need our practice.Centers like ours must be present everywhere in Vietnam inorder to rebuild our country....” The Venerable spoke with suchenthusiasm, and with such a charismatic smile, we looked at eachother and laughed, admiring the Venerable for his talent for givingus effective spiritual boosters.Letting Go of AttachmentsBefore I came to Prajna Temple, I heard Sister Thoai Nghiemsay that the biggest problem here is attachment. I reacted strongly,believing that people with that tendency should be expelled fromthe community. However, living together with the sisters andlistening to them, I understand better the causes of their tendencyfor attachment.I practice Noble Silence each Lazy Monday for at least halfa day, because I conduct an anatomy class for our sisters later inthe afternoon. Last Sunday evening, it was past 10 p.m. alreadywhen one of my mentees came to my room, asking me to help herwith her insomnia because, she said, “I know you’ll be practicingNoble Silence tomorrow.” I told her to return to her bed, lie down,and follow her breathing. If she could not sleep that night, it wouldbe okay; she’s had this problem several years, and we were notgoing to solve it that night. She walked away angry, and her stepswere heavy. A few days later, I asked her if she was still mad atme, and she said her anger resolved after she had been followingher breathing for a while. I asked if she knew why I sent her backto her room that night. “Because you want me to practice takingrefuge in myself,” she replied.Because all of us, monastics as well as aspirants, live in onebuilding, the sisters have the tendency to “stop by” your roomanytime they want. Some also tend to “hang out” nearby or ata distance, looking at you with curious and affectionate eyes.Sometimes I return to my room late, feeling exhausted, and I seesome young aspirants knocking on my window, waving and smiling!!!I have requested a couple of my mentees to memorize thesutra “Taking Refuge in the Island of Self.” They are to recite itto me by memory, to contemplate on this sutra, and to apply thisteaching in their daily lives.Having lived with the sisters and listened to their life stories,I understand more why some of them are prone to attachment.Many of them do not receive love or positive communicationin their families and in their previous temples. Therefore, whenthey happen to meet a person who has some freshness and whospends time to take care of them, they want to attach themselvesto that person. They want to attach their hearts, fragile and fullof sadness, to a person they think they can trust. I see clearly thatas older brothers and sisters, we must practice to nourish stabilityand space within ourselves, so that we can understand othersmore deeply with time, and so that our love entails no “hook” thatothers can “attach” to.Background of Our MonasticsThese past three weeks our dharma teachers have begun tointerview the aspirants and visiting nuns who request to stay andpractice with us. I also participate in these interviews to help assesstheir health condition. Each day, we use the working period,an afternoon activity, and the evening sitting session to conductinterviews. I have learned a great deal from these sessions.There are sisters who are so innocent and pure; they want tobecome monastics because they have seen how beautiful the monasticscan be in their fine manners, behavior, and speech. Thereare also those who come from unhappy families; their parentsabuse and neglect each other, and the young people do not wantto repeat this cycle of suffering. There is one girl who spent mostof her tender years caring for a mother with mental illness, beggingfor food, working as a maid, and defending her mother andherself from perverse men. There are those who came to live in atemple when they were only three or four years old. Yet their facescontinued on page 46the Mindfulness Bell 29