"We are born astride a grave - WaynesWorldStage.com

collected deposit bottles and bought Drake'scupcakes, three for five cents. Once tickets wenton sale we were able to raise our standard ofliving.The theatre was built. We passed thebuilding inspection and were scheduled to openthe next night. The fire inspector came for a finalinspection and said, "I want another exit rightover there." "But the plans were approved," Isaid. He said, "I don't give a shit about the plans.I want an emergency exit!" The wall he waspointing to was reinforced concrete.Fred went out and bought asledgehammer. I took the first swing. How can Idescribe it? I vibrated for five minutes. Therewas not even a chip in the concrete. Afterswinging for ten hours there was a small hole inthe wall. By now it was the morning of openingnight. Fred and I were on the sidewalk takingturns with the hammer. Two soldiers came byand watched as Fred and I were swinging thesledgehammer. "Need some help?" one of themasked. "Yes," Fred said. "Can you afford a caseof beer?" the one soldier asked. "Yes," Fred said."Do you have a chair?" the soldier asked. We gotthe beer and set the chair by the opening in thewall. The Sergeant sat in the chair and opened upa beer. The private picked up the sledgehammer."Swing!" the Sergeant ordered. This continued83