Tony Robbins -Re-Awaken_the_Giant_Within

Our experience of this reality had nothing to do with reality, but was interpreted through the controlling
force of our beliefs: specifically, the rules we had about what had to happen in order for us to feel good.
I call these specific beliefs that determine when we get pain and when we get pleasure rules. Failure to
understand their power can destroy any possibility for lifelong happiness, and a full understanding and
utilization of them can transform your life as much as anything we’ve covered in this entire book.
Let me ask you a question before we go any further. What has to happen in order for you to feel good?
Do you have to have someone hug you, kiss you, make love to you, tell you how much they respect and
appreciate you? Must you make a million dollars? Do you have to hit below-par golf? Do you have to be
acknowledged by your boss? Do you have to achieve all of your goals? Do you have to drive the right
car, go to the right parties, be known by the right people? Do you have to be spiritually evolved or wait
until you achieve total enlightenment? Do you have to run five miles a day? What really has to happen
in order for you to feel good?
The truth is that nothing has to happen in order for you to feel good. You don’t need an eclipse to feel
good. You could feel good right now for absolutely no reason whatsoever! Think about it. If you make a
million dollars, the million dollars doesn’t give you any pleasure. It’s your rule that says, “When I hit this
mark, then I’ll give myself permission to feel good.” In that moment, when you decide to feel good, you
send a message to your brain to change your responses in the muscles of your face, chest, and body, to
change your breathing, and to change the biochemistry within your nervous system that causes you to
feel the sensations you call pleasure.
Who do you think had the worst time the day of the eclipse? Those with the most intense rules about
what had to happen before they could feel good! There’s no doubt that the scientists, and the tourists
who saw themselves as scientists, probably had the most pain. Many of them had huge agendas they
were trying to complete in those four minutes before they could feel good about it.
Don’t misunderstand; there’s nothing wrong with being committed to accomplishing and doing everything
you can. But years ago, I made a distinction that changed the quality of my life forever: as long as we
structure our lives in a way where our happiness is dependent upon something we cannot control, then
we will experience pain. Since I wasn’t willing to live with the fear that pain could shake me anymore,
and I considered myself to be intelligent, I redesigned my rules so that when I feel pain and when I feel
pleasure is whenever I feel it’s appropriate based on my capacity to direct my own mind, body, and
emotions. I enjoyed the eclipse immensely. I was in Hawaii for other reasons anyway (to conduct my threeweek
Certification program), so coming here a few days early to watch the eclipse was a bonus.
But the real reason I enjoyed it was not that I had low expectations; I was looking forward to it. The key
to my happiness could be found in one rule: my rule for the day was that I was going to enjoy this event
no matter what happened. It wasn’t that I didn’t have expectations; it was that I decided that no matter
what happened, I’d find a way to enjoy it.
Now, if you adopted and consistently applied this rule to your own life, can you see how that would
change virtually everything you experience? When I tell people about this rule, some of them respond,
©2013 Robbins Research International. www.tonyrobbins.com 60