L&R June Magazine 2017

How to get and keep respect
I believe one thing people want in life is respect. We want to feel valued, listened to,
and called upon to do ordinary and extraordinary things. It is about self-worth, and it is
about using our talents.
Respect is such a simple thing in concept. In practice, since other people are involved,
respect gets more complicated. Self-interests are mixed in, so emotions and actions
impact us in unexpected or adverse ways.
We cannot get distracted from who we really are and who we really want to be. After
all, respect begins with self-respect, and this is the starting point in how to get and
keep respect.
Practice 1: Engage self-respect.
We need to take care of ourselves first, meaning we need to:
• Expand our mind through learning and reading
• Improve our bodies through exercise and healthy eating
• Refresh our spirit through practices to centre our soul and keep us on a
purpose-filled path
Self-respect puts substance on our presence. It is not a one-time activity. It is a
continuous flow of self-enhancement, self-awareness, and self-empowerment.
The point is self-respect needs to be at the core of how we gain respect in our
community, workplace, family, and other places of interaction. Self-respect, however, is
not arrogance. Arrogance rarely, if ever, inspires respect.
Practice 2: Exhibit strong humility.
Humility denotes self-confidence coupled with an understanding of place. By place, I
mean we are not above others or certain standards. We hold ourselves accountable to
a higher calling.
Humility is strength in who we are and what we are called to do while always being
aware of how we fit into the world and support others around us. Yes, a long way to
simply say “If you want respect, don’t put yourself above others in an inappropriate or
superior way.”
Even better, as Kate Nasser recently pointed out in a blog post:
“Consider replacing the weak image of humility with a picture of its authentic strengths.
Tapping others’ talents shows your confidence. Hearing others’ opinions expands your
view. Celebrating the whole instead of yourself extends your reach.”