L&R June Magazine 2017

I can barely breathe....his solid presence to my back, my head to his chest....his arms
tight around me as i float....he gives me that gift.....leaves me there, the endorphins a
sweet caress to my brain....safe in the circle of his arms...the blissful state of not
feeling.....not thinking....to leave my worries behind till i have to pick back up the pain....
I cried....not something i do often....don't allow it....can't afford it....but this time i did, i
cried for the pain....for the pleasure....for the bright darkness....for the loss of it....for the
fear of wanting too
With every experience he gives me, i
grow....change....the shape and taste of the pain
different....no solid plan, just an infinite trust and
respect for his talent and experience....
My subspace, my dark and light place....the special
gift he gives….
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