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to take charge of my life and move on. I felt like I could not live<br />
the rest of my life miserable and sorrowful. I had the power to<br />
walk out of this oppressing situation. I mean, I now had a job, I<br />
could pay rent. I was not at my father-in-law’s mercy. Part of<br />
the reason I stayed there was out of respect for Patrick. He had<br />
not wanted us to move, so I stayed. However, when my fatherin-law<br />
sold the house, I knew my freedom had come. No one<br />
loves to stay in a place they are not wanted.<br />
After going back and forth with my husband’s trial, engaging<br />
lawyers and still failing to secure his release, I surrendered the<br />
case to God. From that time onwards, I made a decision to use<br />
all my free time for prayer. Patrick was in jail for one year and<br />
was released just before we moved from my father-in-law’s<br />
house. The day Patrick was released was the happiest day of my<br />
life. Even though we were poor and unwanted, at least we were<br />
together. He was my only source of comfort, the love and<br />
security of my life. I did not have anyone else in this world apart<br />
from him because no one wants to befriend a woman whose<br />
name has been slandered on national radio that she is a rebel. I<br />
had neither friends nor family. I only had enemies. When Patrick<br />
was in prison, I was like a moving corpse. People saw me go<br />
about my work and daily business as if all was well, but I was<br />
dead within, only regaining some life and hope when he was<br />
released.<br />
I conceived again shortly after Patrick’s return, and this<br />
prompted him to ask his father to let us stay since we had a baby<br />
coming. I will never forget the response. My father in-law<br />
literally cursed us to go and “breed like dogs”. That was the last<br />
time I ever heard Patrick ask his father for help. With that curse,<br />
we left Patrick’s people. Some things are too difficult to process.<br />
Some wounds are too deep to heal. For Patrick, the pain of<br />
rejection because of the woman he had chosen to marry was<br />
far-reaching. As a man, I know he did not overly express it, but<br />
I am sure it hurt him and his identity. Meanwhile, my own people<br />
never wanted anything to do with me either. Even long after the<br />
genocide ended, I was never comfortable among them.<br />
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