Adventure Magazine Issue 221

LESSONS FROM MY VANLIFE
By Brittany Henning
The past 30 years I have been a part of this nonstop repetitive process called life. There’s a
fixed cycle on the way things are done: go to college, get a job, start a family, and then retire at
the 60 and maybe your health is good enough to travel the world. This cycle is not for me so I
moved into a tiny house on wheels where I can escape at anytime.
Being a woman in a van can be a struggle sometimes. Where can I use the bathroom? When
will my next shower be? What’s that terrifying noise outside? How do I binge watch The
Bachelor with no WiFi? Where is the pizza? These are many questions I have asked myself
more than once this year. I’ll go ahead and dive in.
The bathroom issue is a good start. My wonderful boyfriend made a super cool compost toilet
for the van. It works excellent, but not when it’s that time of the month. The toilet can’t hold that
kind of thing so I get my little shovel and dig a little hole for all of that (away from everything of
course). Otherwise I have to stop a million times at rest areas or any public restrooms along
the way. I love being a woman, but dang I wish there was another alternative to periods. Maybe
we could like get it all out in one day and be done with it? Anyways, sorry for the TMI, but that’s
a big challenge that needed to be mentioned.
Showers… What are those again? There is no shower in the van so mostly I depend on gyms
and my 6 gallon water jugs to do the trick. I am in the Everglades as I am writing this and I
literally just took a water bottle shower outside. A water bottle shower is when you use your
water bottle to pour water on yourself, shampoo your hair, then rinse. This is all while getting bit
by millions of mosquitoes and inviting about 5000 other bugs into the van because you forgot
to shut the door while you showered outside. It’s fine though, my hair feels great and it only
took all night to murder all the bugs that got in.
Now let’s talk terrifying noises outside. I am pretty much scared of any noise I’ve never heard
before. My mind constantly tells me that every noise is a threat to my life. Bird chirping, Is
that a man whistling in the woods before he kills me? Car passing, Is that someone stopping
to murder me? Yea, it’s quite annoying how my mind works. With that being said, I do have
a machete I keep with me in case anything crazy goes down. Why not a gun? I don’t really
want to kill anyone and there are way too many different gun laws in each state. It becomes a
headache to study each one and I plan on visiting Canada, which does not allow guns. No one
questions a machete right? Totally normal!
Most important question of all: How do I watch The Bachelor? My phone thankfully gives me a
good amount of data to use so I can watch Netflix. If it’s a really good season of The Bachelor
I’ll find a store with WiFi and sit in their parking lot just to see what happens. Bonus if there’s
a grocery store nearby to get the best bottle of wine before the show. I can’t wait for the next
season!
Oh yea, and one more question you might have: How do I make pizza or brownies? I can’t
and I’m really sad about that. I have an InstantPot that I use to cook literally everything. Pizza
doesn’t really work well in it (not that I’ve tried, but I can imagine). Brownies I might be able to
make, but they would probably be soggy (ew). So pretty much when I have cravings I get really
grumpy until I drive to the nearest bakery or Pizza Hut to get what I want.
"Vanlife has taught
me to be courageous
and fierce."
All these things may seem scary or turn you off to the idea of Vanlife, but I love it all. The
fact that I could only list about four challenges I have is saying a lot. Vanlife has taught me to
be courageous and fierce. If you asked me 10 years ago if I wanted to live in a tiny van with
no shower I would have laughed and said, “Absolutely Not”. I have become open-minded to
everything the world throws at me and I wish every girl could experience this way of life. All you
women out there, you are so much stronger than you think you are. I hope you never settle
and always push yourself into uncomfortable situations to build your strength and confidence.
Never underestimate yourself!
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