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A fairy tale wedding or a lifelong marriage?<br />
Modern weddings<br />
have become far<br />
too much about a<br />
belief that the wedding day<br />
must be perfect. As a result,<br />
some couples don’t give a<br />
whole lot of thought to the<br />
marriage. Our concentration<br />
has turned more to being<br />
a princess for a day rather<br />
than a day to celebrate the<br />
union of two people coming<br />
together as one to raise<br />
a family.<br />
One of the largest causes of wedding<br />
stress is trying to keep up with<br />
social and peer pressure. Social pressure<br />
or peer pressure appeals to one’s<br />
desire to fit in with others, to experience<br />
acceptance and approval.<br />
There is nothing inherently wrong<br />
with this as human beings are social<br />
creatures and are made to connect<br />
with other human beings. However,<br />
when the desire for social belonging<br />
Stephanie<br />
Abbo<br />
special to the<br />
chaldean news<br />
is paired with pressure to<br />
overspend more than you<br />
can afford, it can make for<br />
a tough situation between<br />
couples.<br />
Social pressure or peer<br />
pressure causes us to overspend<br />
on unnecessary<br />
wedding lavishness. Couples<br />
may feel pressured<br />
to have the “perfect wedding”<br />
because they think<br />
everyone else expects it.<br />
Deciding to go with a simpler wedding<br />
often comes with disapproving<br />
glances and comments from people<br />
whose approval and opinions matter.<br />
But to what extent are couples<br />
digging themselves into debt for<br />
their wedding to satisfy their families<br />
and everyone else?<br />
With the focus now more on<br />
the wedding as opposed to the actual<br />
marriage, the true intention of<br />
uniting a couple to create a family<br />
has been lost. The holy sacrament<br />
of marriage should be the celebration<br />
of the couple and their union.<br />
Many brides, nowadays, have completely<br />
taken over wedding planning<br />
(in which most grooms will<br />
happily not take part) and enjoy<br />
the attention they get as brides, especially<br />
if it’s lacking in other areas<br />
of their lives.<br />
The amount of debt a couple<br />
racks up with these weddings could<br />
possibly be the reason for so many<br />
failed marriages. So does a big wedding<br />
lead to a big divorce? Maybe<br />
not, but it is worth thinking about<br />
as you make plans for your nuptials.<br />
After all, the wedding is one day;<br />
the marriage is forever.<br />
In America, large, expensive<br />
weddings were not the norm.<br />
At the turn of the 20th century,<br />
couples tended to marry in their<br />
homes. In the 1930s, jewelry manufacturers<br />
like DeBeers coined the<br />
slogan, “a diamond is forever.” Obviously<br />
it worked.<br />
As a community we need to start<br />
living for ourselves instead of living<br />
to impress other people, who will not<br />
be footing the bill for that extravagant<br />
wedding party. There should be<br />
more concern regarding the financial<br />
debt you are creating for yourself and<br />
your new family.<br />
It’s easy to get caught up in planning<br />
an extravagant wedding because<br />
quite frankly, who doesn’t want<br />
to experience the finer things in life?<br />
The problem is that there is nothing<br />
extravagant about having outstanding<br />
credit card debt. Divorce statistics<br />
are at an all-time high, but the<br />
bridal industry is booming.<br />
Stephanie Abbo is responsible for<br />
employment law and human resources<br />
at a consulting company. She is focused<br />
on spending most of her free time<br />
serving Jesus Christ.<br />
<strong>MARCH</strong> <strong>2012</strong> CHALDEAN NEWS 13
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