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Quiet chuckles go off around the group, and I unlock the door, hurryingeveryone inside.“How do you know no one will see it tomorrow and get rid of the paintbefore Monday?” Misha asks.It’s Saturday night, so it’s possible.But…“Roofers will be here tomorrow to fix the leaks,” I explain. “Teachersare being asked to stay out of the building for safety.” I look around at all ofthem. “You know what to do?”“Yep.”“Absolutely.”“Ready.”Okay, then. “Let’s go.”Monday morning, Misha and I walk into school, staring ahead as the stormwhirls around us.A big part of me knows we shouldn’t have done it. There are all kindsof ways to handle our problems, after all. Better ways to deal with theissues.But what Misha said was true. Everyone is ugly, aren’t we? Some wearit and some hide it.I guess I just got tired of Trey hiding it.And of everyone allowing him to keep it hidden.I did a bad, bad thing.“Oh, my God,” a guy mumbles off to my side, and I look over to seehim reading something I’d written Saturday night.
“Hey, did you see this?” a girl gasps, asking her friend as they gape atthe opposite wall.I look down the corridor, seeing several messages written here and thereand people fluttering about, taking it all in.You shouldn’t be caught alone with me. You’ve been asking for this.-Trey BurrowesCan you even find your dick anymore, faggot?-Trey BurrowesI’m going to fuck her and then fuck her mom. Watch me.Every corner you turn, every night when you go to sleep, I’ll be there, andI’m going to find out exactly what I’ve been missing.Doesn’t take long for you little bitches to turn slut once you get a taste forit.You should’ve seen the train we pulled on this girl last week. She had guyslined up. It was so fucking good.Head down, ass up, that’s the way we like to fuck.Trey, Trey, and more Trey.We keep walking, passing the quotes all four of us wrote on the walls,lockers, and floors Saturday night, turning down another hall and seeingeven more.
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Penelope DouglasCopyright © 2016 P
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Chapter 20Chapter 21Chapter 22Epilo
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To Claire and Benderand what would
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It’s just that…given all of her
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continue to communicate this way be
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“I’m on my way.” I start the
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enough to jog in the middle of nowh
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“Yessssss.” She bows her head i
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everyone moving about, their laught
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“And you don’t?”I feel his ey
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No, it’s not her. It can’t be.
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“Hi.”I dart my eyes up, my hear
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“Or…” she goes on, sounding a
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But she doesn’t back down or feig
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Before pulling away and saying good
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On the current news front, I got in
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Straightening, I place my hands on
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“I posted my review for Brave New
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chair and snatch up my jean shorts.
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a man.”I lean back in my seat, ca
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A few months ago, a jogger named An
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through the elephant and hot air ba
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have to fake it much around him.The
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himself how awesome he is. Trey Bur
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around the park quickly. Come on!
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“Well, if there is,” I speak lo
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“Go,” I tell Ten, nudging his b
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“Let’s go, ladies!” Coach pou
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“Boo.” Lyla pouts. “That’s
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I toss the smooth, tan fabric at he
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mine.Annoyance pricks at me. Awesom
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that right, Manny?” I call out, k
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Trey tosses another paper, harder t
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“It’s him,” Ten whispers in m
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I drop my pencil to the table and r
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I spin around and walk for Masen, a
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I don’t have to turn around to kn
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I was able to get Pre-Calc done at
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couple of hours afterward. I have a
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I lunge for him.I grab hold of the
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I stare at the word written on the
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probably doesn’t have any money,
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“Can I at least read something wr
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I catch sight of Masen out of the c
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there’s no talking. You’re work
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I look up, shaking my head. “No.
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No one’s talking about it. No one
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Starting it up, he steps on the gas
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Dear Ryen,I hold the pen over the p
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fantasize I kept them? Maybe with a
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But then I see the passenger side d
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“Does she want it back?”I smile
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“Dude, we should get out of here,
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I turn around and walk down the hal
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“And here I thought you ate child
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I widen my eyes, and every muscle i
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hear the pigeons flapping through t
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drawer. The rest of Misha’s lette
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letters have been slowing down over
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I groan inwardly. Yeah, but “Punk
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I turn and see Lyla, looking a litt
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Even Manny is missing, probably hav
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J.D., Lyla, and I stand and watch a
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Masen approaches, and my heartbeat
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I knock his arm away, my stomach ti
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school, so I’m not here for that.
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I should just leave. Walk out the f
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stay out of my way, or I’ll make
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She twists around and takes out the
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Annie’s fabric softener. She was
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An ache lodges in my throat, and I
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I make it back to the school just a
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“Masen, stop!” I hear someone y
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I bite my tongue, too fucking angry
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Don’t change, Ryen wrote in a let
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Trey is nearly forgotten. For the m
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flicks the ring.I groan again, unab
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I lick my lips, feeling the warm me
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I trail my hand across my cheek and
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She nods, her blue eyes smiling at
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I pass the houses and read the numb
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I bring up my hand and rap on the d
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“Can you believe Masen Laurent?
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Masen pushes off the lockers, still
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him.I want to be closer.He presses
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Making sure the girl who got out a
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through, because I wasn’t sure wh
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He hasn’t called me, though.If he
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I run across the school parking lot
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-PunkI smile to myself. Looks like
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Why would I say anything? This is h
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it open, hearing the alarm go off.
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She raises her eyes, looking a litt
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falls into me, and we both tumble t
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She moans, arching her back, and my
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right thing to drive me insane and
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watching her warily. She dresses an
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I didn’t leave any graffiti last
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on to the roll bar and yelling to s
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“I can handle my boyfriend,” sh
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“Well, I guess there’s somethin
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Good in bed? The thought of him enj
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I sift through change, a few receip
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“You can’t, can you?” His voi
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well as a couple next to us.Masen b
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“You are kissing me.”He gnaws m
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And all of a sudden, I’m not worr
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He pushes up one of my knees, openi
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“Just for a minute, okay?” I pl
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I don’t even want to look outside
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I shoot him a nasty look. But then
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I stop.He touches my face, coming i
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trash can.I curl my fingers around
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I reach down, pretending to get som
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shitty.”I stop and turn my eyes o
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Oh, please. I slide in between him
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I’m going to hell. I’m pretty s
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Reaching down, I left the sheet up,
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I groan, my cock straining against
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move and back up into my cock, eage
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trying to come down.I better get ou
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raided Lieber’s Bakery during sch
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I don’t fear Lyla’s judgement a
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I try to act like a badass, but hon
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He takes my phone out of my hand an
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Of course not. Their dog is big but
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I touch his arm. “Masen?” I say
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“What do you think?” he teases.
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all of them? And Sylvie’s the swe
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I don’t know if Ten will stick wi
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it for the morning when I can watch
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It rhymes. Like a song.Alone, Empty
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I’m about to fucking choke, I can
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Everything is dark, not a single li
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I look up at him, wishing he was aw
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I guess I’ll find out.“I’ve b
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These were all letters that were se
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And I immediately feel her.Standing
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about our parents—the decaying he
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“I lied about the people in my li
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“Where were you this morning?”
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I finish getting my things and clos
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“You’re gonna be,” I threaten
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all do that, because we’re sick o
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town for the night, but they didn
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I laugh. I’ve known him long enou
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Malcolm beats through the fill, the
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I pick up my phone and check to see
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called already, just to break it up
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But I turn back around, advancing o
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“I forget,” I answer, still sta
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I guess they would know. A few year
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His friend, Kai, quietly laughs at
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“Yeah?” I turn my eyes back on
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She keeps stride, her beautiful ass
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The next day, he’s not in our fir
Page 317 and 318: Over here, separated, alone, and ex
Page 319 and 320: The O.J. sticks to my legs and seep
Page 321 and 322: Just being near him is soothing at
Page 323 and 324: He leads me into a spacious bathroo
Page 325 and 326: Remembering back, I was pretty hard
Page 327 and 328: with. I could go back. I could be t
Page 329 and 330: I close my eyes again, hearing what
Page 331 and 332: “Talk to me,” he whispers. “I
Page 333 and 334: “Yeah. We were always just friend
Page 335 and 336: For the rest of the night.
Page 337 and 338: I’m not sure if he’s going to b
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Page 341 and 342: I dart my eyes to the sides, lookin
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Page 345 and 346: But he just looks over at me, looki
Page 347 and 348: to clean off my arm where thick che
Page 349 and 350: Everyone gets busy eating. J.D. ste
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Page 353 and 354: and energy to be everything she was
Page 355 and 356: “Well, you are the grandson of a
Page 357 and 358: My sister, I think, was just aggrav
Page 359 and 360: feel like Misha’s just doing me a
Page 361 and 362: leading us into the ballroom. The f
Page 363 and 364: I notice Trey lumbering toward her
Page 365 and 366: him to keep going.When did he write
Page 367: You’re not alone. It gets better.
Page 371 and 372: I turn to Misha, sighing. “You sh
Page 373 and 374: “Sit down.”I prefer to stand, b
Page 375 and 376: She raises her eyes, locking on min
Page 377 and 378: the tops of my knees. “And I want
Page 379 and 380: could’ve, she would’ve. She did
Page 381 and 382: “It’s just bullshit dives and f
Page 383 and 384: “What if she doesn’t even remem
Page 385 and 386: the night off. Go get a date.”Som
Page 387 and 388: father in Thunder Bay, but the nigh
Page 389 and 390: What a baby. He knew when he marrie
Page 391 and 392: Thank you for reading and reviewing
Page 393 and 394: That’s right. I was in the bathro
Page 395 and 396: Love,Ryen
Page 397 and 398: yourself, even if it means those ar
Page 399 and 400: Fifty-seven letters I didn’t send
Page 401 and 402: You told us to prepare now and play
Page 403 and 404: HE WON’T BE HERE.There’d be no
Page 405 and 406: applied a little lip gloss. I scurr
Page 407 and 408: What I always wanted to do.To look
Page 409 and 410: shirt, and silver tie. So clean. So
Page 411 and 412: Us? No.Trevor didn’t make my hear
Page 413 and 414: brows that slanted inward, making h
Page 415 and 416: She had texted earlier, saying she
Page 417 and 418: nature and self-preservation, and d
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here?But those masks. They were the
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To Ing Cruz at As the Pages Turn Bo
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Penelope Douglas is a New York Time
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