Frank Magazine Issue 578.pdf - Besthostingplanever.com

FAX ANYTIME: (902) 423-0281
LETTERS
WEB: www.atlanticfrank.ca
PO BOX 295, HALIFAX, NS B3J 2N7
FROM THE
OSTRICH FILES
Dear Frank:
Re: Stephen & Laureen
Harper’s marriage, Frank 577
I can’t believe this story is
not being picked up!! What on
Earth is happening? Even if
they’re not living apart now,
surely it is worth reporting
even if it’s only in passing.
Ed Grrrr R. Murrow,
Melbourne, Australia
GOOD DEEDS INDEED
Dear Frank:
Re: Condo Memories of Randy Duplak,
Frank 576
What are you trying to say here?
The pluses of being a capable functionary
and committed to various
philanthropic organizations
seem to be cancelled out by
his work for the N.S. Human
Rights Kangaroo
Court and confining his
good deeds to those charities
most relevant to his
own tribe?
Hopefully not, but if so,
then I can only repeat that
aphorism of those humanitarians,
the Khmer Rouge,
Randy Duplak
and that is, “Keeping you is no gain. Losing
you is no loss.”
Next.
Jim Lehman,
East Margaretsville
A BIRD IN THE
HAND, ETC., ETC.
Dear Frank:
Curiosity runs deep in the woods about
Truro Park, so let’s send in a film crew.
Anxious folks need to see what these birds
are doing under the shaking bushes and
humps of snow. Or is it too frosty to huff ‘n’
puff? Ask the users.
Yours,
Hank E. Panky
I’M TOO SEXY FOR MY ... PORT
Hey Frank,
U R a dickhead. We Capers look at you and say “dickhead.” In your last
rag (Frank 577), you called Sydport an ugly duckling, and said the Philadelphia
Regional Port Authority sounded “more macho” than Sydport. We think,
no, we know it, you’re mixed up.
Philly’s name is way, way too formal, you know, it sounds like the someone
who has been in school too long. Macho it is not. Philly sounds girly, man!
Anyone, especially Hellifax — where they continue to spend and steal Cape
Breton’s money and industry every day — would love to have a macho, quickfast
name like Sydport.
Sydport is professional, and short, and to the point, don’t you think, dickhead?
Yes, we read your paper for free at the local convenience store. You think we
pay for garbage?
(signed) Capers Tommy, Robb, Will, James, Tony and Jim,
Undisclosed C.B. corner store
WHO YOU CALLIN’ A WANNABE?
Dear Frank:
I was reading your Frank 100 and noticed
an article about Brendan Riley, the son of
Sean Riley (Frank 575).
You were talking about how he got a $32,000
scholarship to St. F.X. and how it seemed unfit
he should receive it. I think your reporter
should have done some more research.
I went to school with Brendan last year and
he was an excellent, straight “A” student. (I
use quotes because he took IB - International
Bachaulaureate — which is actually graded
with numbers.)
There is no better student to receive such
LOCAL HEROS
ARE OFF LIMITS!
Dear Frank:
It’s great to see you crapping on the politicians and
money mongers of this country, but you go over the line
when you yap on unnecessarily about local heros like
Sidney Crosby. Only shows what a real dumb ass you
are and will certainly do nothing to help your circulation.
Hy Stickin,
Cole Harbour
THERE’S
NO LIFE
LIKE
IT...
Dear Frank:
I’m the married mother of two, and I
have more restrictions on my day-to-day
existence than convicted government
fraudster Natalie Pelrine’s conditional
sentence (Frank 577) does!
Rhea Dichulus,
West End Halifax
an award. He will be going places in his life,
unlike the NEWSpaper wannabe that wrote
this article. I understand that some, maybe
even a lot, of your articles are based on the
truth, but this article was just a way for the
reporter to have something to print because
he/she had no other stories.
I think an article with an apology is required
from your reporter, not only because it was disrespectful
to both Brendan and Sean, but because
I’m guessing that the reporter will have
nothing else good to print for the next issue.
U.S. Huck,
Antigonish County
Sidney Crosby
FEBRUARY 16, 2010 ATLANTIC CANADA FRANK 31