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Gammer Gurton's Needle 9
Hodge: Now a vengeance light on all the sort, that better should have kept it – 1
The cat, the house, and Tyb our maid, that better should have swept it!
[He spies Gammer coming out.]
See where she's coming, crawling! Come on, in twenty devil's way! 2
You have made a fair day's work, have you not? Pray you, say! 3
THE FIRST ACT
The fourth scene.
[Gammer enters from her house. Hodge and Tyb
remain; Cocke enters later.]
Gammer: Alas, Hodge! Alas! I may well curse and ban
This day, that ever I saw it, with Gib and the milk-pan!
For this, and ill luck together, as knoweth Cocke, my boy,
Have struck away my dear nee'le, and robbed me of my joy!
My fair, long, straight nee'le that was my only treasure!
The first day of my sorrow is, and last end of my pleasure! 4
Hodge: Might have kept it when you had it! But fools will be fools still!
Lose that is fast 5 in your hands? You need not, but you will!
Gammer: Go hie thee, Tyb, and run, thou whore, to the end here of the town! 6
Didst carry out dust in thy lap; seek where thou poured it down;
And, as thou sawest me raking in the ashes while I mourned,
So see in all the heap of dust thou leave no straw unturned!
Tyb: That 'Chall, Gammer, swithe and tight, 7 and soon be here again!
Gammer: Tyb! Stoop and look down to the ground! To it, and take some pain! 8
Hodge: Here is a pretty matter! To see this gear how it goes! 9
By Gog's soul, I think you would lose your arse if it were loose!
Your nee'le lost? It is a pity you should lack care and endless sorrow! 10
Gog's death, how shall my breeches be sewed? Shall I go thus tomorrow? 11
1
Now a vengeance … it: Now may something bad happen to all the things that should have made the situation better but
didn't! Hodge is cursing everything that caused Gammer Gurton to fail in sewing up his breeches.
2
Come on . . . way: Hurry up, in the name of twenty devils!
3
You have . . . say: You’ve done a pretty piece of work today, haven't you? Please tell me that!
4
The first . . . pleasure: This is the first day of my lasting sorrow and the day that ends all my joy.
5
Fast: as a countryman from the South of England, Hodge would pronounce his f's like v's, so this would come out "vast".
He's saying "Lose something that you're holding tight in your hands? You shouldn't—but of course you would!"
6
Go hie . . . town: Go run fast, Tyb, you whore, to the ash-heaps and dumps on the edge of town.
7
Swathe and tight: quickly and thoroughly
8
Take some pain: Be very careful!
9
To see . . . goes: To see how this business runs
10
It is a pity . . . sorrow: It's too bad you're not condemned to eternal woe and sorrow!
11
Tomorrow, we'll see, is Sunday. Both pairs of Hodge's breeches have rips in the seat. What will he wear to church?