The Laughable Stories Collected by Mar Gregory John

112 THE LAUGHABLE STORIES OF BAR-HEBR^US.
he hid the figs in the skirts of his garments. Then
he drew his head inside the body of his garment and
cried out to the man from within, saying, "I am fumi-
**gating myself from below because I have taken cold;
''therefore stay outside for a little until I can stand up,
''and blame [me] not."
CCCCXXXII. Another man relates the following:—
'*I was sitting at the table of a certain miser when he
"took a bread-cake in his hand, and said, 'People com-
*
'plain that my bread-cakes are small; now what son
"of a whore is able to eat the whole of one of these
"bread-cakes?"'
CCCCXXXIII. Another miser used to say, "If we
"were to gratify the lust of the poor by granting their
"requests, we should be worse than they."
CCCCXXXIV. The noblemen of a certain miserly
king said unto him, "If thou wishest, be pleased to make
"a certain sign to us, so that when we see it we may
"depart from thy presence that thou mayest have rest.
"Thy father had a sign which consisted in his saying,
"'Whenever ye please,' and as soon as the nobles heard
"these words they departed, and thine ancestor straight-
"way threw the sceptre out of his hand. But now what
"sign wilt thou give us?" He said to them, "My sign
"is this:—When I ask the cooks, saying, 'What have
'*ye prepared?' let no man prolong his sitting in my
"presence."
CCCCXXXV. When the friend of a certain miser
went to visit him he brought him some dates, and
they began to eat; and every time that the master of
the house ate one the friend ate one also. And when
the master of the house saw that the dates were com-
ing to an end, he said to his friend, "O thou man of