The Laughable Stories Collected by Mar Gregory John

STORIES OF CLOWNS AND SIMPLETONS. 1 47
DLXXV. A certain simple judge was asked, "What
'•ought to be done unto the man who committeth an
•'offence with a she-ass?" and he replied, ''They should
"both be put to death." And the people said, "Wherein
//"hath the she-ass offended, for it is an irrational animal,
"and hath no understanding?" He replied, "If my
"mother or my sister happened to be the she-ass I
'•would put her to death without mercy."
DLXXVI. The son of a certain silly old woman
died—now his name was Lazarus— and the priest was
burying him. And when he began to read the [section
of the] Gospel which begins, "Now Lazarus was dead',"
he said, "Lazarus is dead, and I rejoice." And the //
old woman said to him, "And why shouldst thou not
"rejoice? For behold, his clothing, and his bed, and
"everything which he possessed have been carried to
••thy house."
DLXXVII. A certain poet made some verses in
praise of a certain weak-minded man who said to him,
••I cannot reward thee with anything which I possess,
"but if thou hast committed any offence I will forgive
'•it thee."
DLXXVIII. When another foolish man was praying
in a church, he said, "O my Lord, have pity upon me,
"and pardon me the offences which I have committed //
"by Thy will and against Thy will, with Thy know-
"ledge and without Thy knowledge."
DLXXIX. And another said, "Forgive me all my
"sins which are known unto Thee, and those which '
"are not."
DLXXX. Another simpleton said when the rain fell
^ See St. John xi. 14.
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