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Cultural aspects in Christian and Islamic religions - unesdoc - Unesco

Cultural aspects in Christian and Islamic religions - unesdoc - Unesco

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Faqihs (experts <strong>in</strong> <strong>Islamic</strong> law) frown upon extravagant ceremonies or<br />

extravagant mahr amounts. But the Koranic text says that the bride may ask for<br />

anyth<strong>in</strong>g she wants, <strong>and</strong> whatever she asks for will be hers alone. The man may<br />

not do her <strong>in</strong>justice by tak<strong>in</strong>g mahr away from her. God has said: ‘Give women<br />

their dowry (sadaqah), a free offer<strong>in</strong>g (nihlah). And if they will<strong>in</strong>gly offer you any<br />

of it, then consume it <strong>in</strong> peace of m<strong>in</strong>d <strong>and</strong> wholesomeness.’ (Sura: Women(4),<br />

Verse 4). Sadaqah is the dowry, <strong>and</strong> the free offer<strong>in</strong>g (nihlah) means that there<br />

should be noth<strong>in</strong>g <strong>in</strong> exchange. Nihlah is not the word for dowry; it is all what is<br />

given without exchange. The Verse ends a habit that dates back to pre-<strong>Islamic</strong><br />

times when the father would take his daughter’s dowry. Islam ended this habit,<br />

<strong>and</strong> the dowry became the right of the woman alone unless she gives up this<br />

dowry to her father or any one else will<strong>in</strong>gly.<br />

For the Mowahidoon (Unitarian) Druze Community, marriage is based on mutual<br />

consent <strong>and</strong> agreement between the betrothed. No coercion should be exerted<br />

on any of them. The Muwahhid is to make an effort (‘ijtihad) to choose a wife<br />

who is pious, composed, <strong>and</strong> of good orig<strong>in</strong>s <strong>and</strong> a good family. This is also what<br />

a girl should look for when choos<strong>in</strong>g s<strong>in</strong>ce this choice has a great impact on the<br />

upbr<strong>in</strong>g<strong>in</strong>g of the children <strong>and</strong> their righteousness.<br />

An engaged male is eligible for marriage upon be<strong>in</strong>g eighteen of age, <strong>and</strong> the<br />

girl upon turn<strong>in</strong>g seventeen. The girl’s parents ought to enquire about the fiancé<br />

<strong>and</strong> tell that to their daughter giv<strong>in</strong>g her advice leav<strong>in</strong>g the f<strong>in</strong>al decision to her.<br />

A girl should not be engaged to two persons at the same time or <strong>in</strong> a divorce<br />

wait<strong>in</strong>g period or <strong>in</strong> mourn<strong>in</strong>g. Muwahidoon Sheikhs do not approve of clamor<br />

at marriage ceremonies. The guests must be honored with what is appropriate<br />

for the occasion along with remembrance of God <strong>and</strong> ‘ishhar (mak<strong>in</strong>g the<br />

marriage public).<br />

115

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