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Mom was sitting there crying with<br />
me and my Dad was just quiet for a<br />
bit. I remember it vividly. (I’m tearing<br />
up as I’m writing this because<br />
I’m amazed at how blessed I am with<br />
the parents that I have.)<br />
I then remember my Dad<br />
looking over at me telling me that<br />
they loved me no matter what I was.<br />
It didn’t matter to them. At that exact<br />
moment, years and years of guilt,<br />
self-hate, and a multitude of other<br />
problems just fell off my shoulders.<br />
It was like someone took a hundred<br />
pound weight off each side of my<br />
body, it was an amazing feeling.<br />
I also remember the next<br />
morning before I left, my Dad walks<br />
up to me and just says, “with this<br />
decision, just be sure to wear a<br />
condom.” I was like, WOW, that’s<br />
good enough, thanks! It made me<br />
laugh. Oh and by the way, I learned<br />
my sophomore year of college about<br />
how a person contracts HIV and<br />
once I figured that out, my whole<br />
thought process changed!<br />
I told my parents to not tell<br />
anyone because I wanted to tell them<br />
but you know how parents are. My<br />
Dad called my brother and my sister<br />
and told them both and said<br />
“Zak’s going to<br />
tell you that<br />
he’s gay and<br />
if you have a<br />
problem with<br />
it, you’re out of<br />
the family and<br />
we’ll never talk<br />
to you again.”<br />
Who can ask for more supportive<br />
parents than that!? Mom was<br />
very excited and happy that I had<br />
finally been honest with myself and<br />
she had the love and compassion to<br />
not say, “I told you so!” ;) Love you<br />
Mom and Dad!<br />
So I told my sister at dinner<br />
one night that I was seeing someone<br />
and his name was Nick. She almost<br />
choked on her salad! She was good<br />
at acting like she didn’t know.<br />
I told my best friend Vince lastly<br />
because I wasn’t able to be there<br />
for him like he needed me to when<br />
he came out to me and I felt guilty.<br />
I told him and it took him a couple<br />
days to deal with it but then he took<br />
me out on my first “gay-outing!” We<br />
decided to do it up big and it was<br />
Halloween. Amazingly fun! I’ve<br />
never looked back.<br />
Still to this day, I have never<br />
slept with a woman, nor wanted to,<br />
and I’ve only kissed one girl. It was<br />
a random event and quite funny in<br />
my opinion. I was with a group of<br />
my friends and we were at a bar and<br />
she asked them if they had all been<br />
with girls.<br />
They all had and I said I<br />
hadn’t. She asked me if I had even<br />
kissed a girl and I said no. She said<br />
well how do you know you’re gay?<br />
I said, “you just know ;)” Then she<br />
came up and started kissing me! She<br />
was quite the firecracker! She was a<br />
gorgeous blond and I was flattered<br />
but then she had to ask, “so how was<br />
that?” I said, “I miss the stubble!”<br />
105 ARIES / JUNE <strong>2014</strong>
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