Let’s be honest here....we love the feeling that we get when you are in a new relationship and want to keep that. Over time things become routine and less fun. We have why! You Flirt With More Randoms Even though my guy makes me feel like the most handsome man in the world, I still can’t turn off the flirt-dar. “I want through a phase right after our fisrt year, when I flirt shamelessly with guys when I went out with my friends,” says Gary 28., who’s been with his guy for almost five years. “It feels good to know that you are still desired.” When your guy (and there is even something dumpy sounding about that title to some), there is this fear that you will lose that somethin’ somethin’ that makes men turn their heads, so you may even go into flirt overdrive, “it is always nice to be reacted to as a guy,” says Pepper Schwartz, PhD, coauthor of The Normal Bar, “As long as it is only a little flirting there is no harm done.” You Think About Breakup “This is effed up!”,says Max, 29. “But in those early months, if my guy really pissed me off, I though, JUNE <strong>2014</strong> / ARIES 94 I’ll just break up with him!” You might even dream about what life would have been like with an ex— with time, even your douchiest former boyfriend can take on a Ryan Gosling-like glow. But—scouts honor—thinking about a breakup won’t doom you to it. “Even happy couples have considered a breakup,” says Schwartz. “Being in a relationship is hard work, but a lot of men have a fairy-tale view on it. It’s normal especially in the beginning to doubt that this is the right person when your fantasy doesn’t align with the reality.” When your boyfriend does sometihng annoying, you have to fix it or you feel like you are stuck with it forever. That’s helps getting past the big bumps in the road. Your Skinny Jeans Get Tight A loving relationship has a direct correlation to love handles. A recent survey by Southern Methodist University shows that the happier the union, the more likely it is that you will gain weight. Not only that, but so many men go on crazy diets to just to get back to where they were when they first met. “I was in shape to begin with, but I lost around 15 pounds for my 1 year anniversary, Aaron, 30, “Over the course of the year following, I returned back to the weight I was and the jeans that I wore on our first date fit once again. You Are Not Attached At The Hip I was out of college, I envisioned marriage like so: coming home every night to snuggle and eat a homemade quinoa salad with fancy silverware. The only part of that fantasy that became reality was the fancy silverware. “I was also surprised that my boyfriend and I didn’t send more alone time together,” agrees Angelo, 25, and have been together for 3 years. “I thought we had become homebodies, but I was still playing the intramural soccer on weeknights and still wanting to party with our friends on the weekends.” Turns out, this is a sign of a healthy relationship. “If you are feeling validated by your partner and you know that person loves you and is committed to you, you are going to do your own thing and not feel paranoid about spending time apart,” says marriage therapist Eris Huemer, PsyD. And research shows that couples who maintain their independence tend to be happier in the long run. Sex Gets Better... File this one under pleasant surprises. “People tend to think of relationship sex as routine, but it gets better, not worse,” says Marco. “There is a new depth to your relationship, and the sense that you are really going through life together makes you feel connected during sex. That makes everything so much more intense. ... But Less Frequent The flip side is that the promise of forever also means that the chase is ovah. Also, running a household is a lot of unsexy work. There is a learning curve when it comes to being in a relationship with a guy you run a household with to the guy you get naked with. “I keep tabs on how often we have sex and try to have it,” says George., 23. Smart, because regular sex will keep strong. “It’s all about keeping each other less unhappy and more in sync.”
95 ARIES / JUNE <strong>2014</strong>