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TÊTE À TÊTE
Mrs. Thrity Contractor, could you tell us about your introduction to the Armed Forces?
I was introduced to the Armed Forces only after my marriage. Coming from a civilian
background, without any idea about the Navy, I was at first totally overwhelmed with all the naval
jargon, the customs, uniforms, ranks, not to forget the do’s and don’ts,’ and other social expectations.
In short I was totally “at sea”. But with the help of friends who taught me the ropes, I soon settled down
to life as a Lt. Cdr’s wife.
What were your earlier experiences like?
Well, life in the Navy was certainly very different and exciting. Every third day there was some
event or the other. VIP visits, ships anniversaries, sporting events, welcomes, farewells and so on.
There was never a dull moment. But behind this façade of fun and games, the work culture was
serious and very professional. Perfection was the bottom line. There was no room for frivolity or “chalta
hai”. Things had to be just so, even on the home front. Trained as they are to face any challenges
head on, our husbands expect us to do the same, ie, to tackle all tasks independently and rise to the
occasion, whatever it may be, without any fuss.
I realized that for men in uniform, their duty and service took priority over family, and I too like
others around me, took things in my stride and got used to managing home and family on my own..
Luckily, there was an excellent support system of friendly neighbors and we all helped each other.
What do you think are the strong points of life in the Services?
There are many plus points to a Service life and I shall not dwell on the obvious issues of living in
interesting places or our active social life, free medical facilities, comforts of cantonment living… etc.
To my mind, the best thing about Service life is the strong bonding and the camaraderie that we share,
living together as a family, despite our diverse faiths, cultural backgrounds and beliefs. In the Armed
Forces, the word ‘family’ is not restricted to blood relatives or in-laws, but includes course mates,
shipmates, colleagues in squadrons, regiments et al.
The other is the discipline and ethos of the Armed Forces that provides a safe, secure, clean and
stimulating living environment which helps an individual realize his/her potential.
We also have the opportunity to interact with eminent personalities from all walks of life, as well as
foreign dignitaries, artistes, statesmen and politicians.
Lastly, Service regulations with frequent transfers, constant adjustments to changing situations
and environment, the rigors of managing home and family single handedly are all great challenges
that we learn to overcome. When viewed in retrospect, it is these difficulties that have made us Service
wives and our children confident, strong, capable, accommodating and broadminded.
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