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TO OUR BETTER HALVES I had developed a misconception about myself that after 20 years of grinding in the Navy I am now in a position to just pick up the pen and write a few lines on almost any subject connected to affairs maritime. My confidence was shattered when the opportunity came to write for this our own magazine, I must admit that my pen moved frantically over the paper for about an hour without writing a single letter; when in that very moment of disgust and disappointment with self that my better half appeared from the kitchen and our usual conversation, that by any standards cannot be termed intellectual, began. By the time we finished our brief exchange of views I had received the inspiration to write - just the right thing for the right patrons - Dear ladies with due apologies, we men have the following to say... ☞ Let us ogle. We’re going to look anyway; it’s genetic. ☞ Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. ☞ ☞ ☞ ☞ ☞ We don’t know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on the calendar. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us we refuse to start another debate. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways makes you unhappy, we meant the other one. ☞ ☞ ☞ ☞ ☞ ☞ ☞ If it itches, it will be scratched. Crying is blackmail. Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really! If we ask what’s wrong and you say “nothing”, we will act like; nothing is wrong. We know you’re lying, but It is just not worth the hassle. We are the Indian Idols in our bathrooms and we need no Anu Malik to certify this. Shopping is not a sport, and no, we’re never going to think of it that way. ☞ Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. ☞ Believe us our mothers are good souls. ☞ ☞ ☞ ☞ ☞ All good habits in our kids is because of us. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. Our marriage anniversary is our event that in no way suggests that you only get the gift. You can either tell us to do something or tell us how to do something but not both. We guys own just three pairs of shoes. What makes you think we’d be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress? ☞ ☞ ☞ ☞ OK ! You don’t mention SRK’s six pack abs and we won’t talk of Aishwarya at her age. We all men share the opinion Ekta Kapoor agar mil jaye to... dhishum dhishum. Ask for what you want. Let’s be clear on this one: Subtle hints don’t work. Strong hints don’t work. Really obvious hints don’t work. Just say it ! Why do you ask “how was the food” only the day you also know it was good? - Commander Raman Arora (Delhi) 56
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Page 6 and 7: ANNUAL REPORT - WESTERN REGION Tatr
Page 8 and 9: VADINAR CGWWA Vadinar is functionin
Page 10 and 11: ANNUAL REPORT - EASTERN REGION The
Page 12 and 13: TUTICORIN Christmas was celebrated
Page 14 and 15: ANNUAL REPORT - A & N REGION The Co
Page 16 and 17: Tailoring, Beauty Treatment and Mac
Page 18 and 19: CGWWA AWARDS It is said that nothin
Page 20 and 21: TÊTE À TÊTE Mrs. Thrity Contrac
Page 22 and 23: something new. Much later, I joined
Page 24 and 25: I, MONKEYS AND MY WIFE’S GOLD CHA
Page 26 and 27: EMERALD ISLES The Emerald isles, a
Page 28 and 29: MY PET My excellent marks won me a
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Page 32 and 33: MY VISIT TO HEAVEN I dreamt that I
Page 34 and 35: A LESSON LEARNT Sandy looked up wit
Page 36 and 37: TRUTH ABOUT FEELINGS, LOVE & EGO On
Page 38 and 39: A PLENTEOUS LIFE Friendship is a re
Page 40 and 41: (x) tks Hkh lsok,a yh xbZ gks muesa
Page 44 and 45: MAN IN THE MIRROR When you get thin
Page 46 and 47: (6) vk/kqfud ;qx esa ukjh dk LFkku
Page 48 and 49: yM$dh ekÈ-cki dk lgkjk Hkkjro"kZ n
Page 50 and 51: WINNERS VERSUS LOSERS The winner is
Page 52 and 53: WONDERFUL VISIT TO A&N ISLANDS It i
Page 54 and 55: Muthu & the interviewer Interviewer
Page 56 and 57: WONDERFUL LIFE Hailing from a small
Page 58 and 59: BEING A COAST GUARD SPOUSE MEANS
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Page 62 and 63: going to see their Judgment Day! I
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