personality disorders explained

16. THE IMAGE MAKER will flaunt his 'toys', his children, his wife, his credentials and
accomplishments. Admiration, attention, even glances from others, our envy or our
fear are his objective. He is never satisfied. We see his arrogance and haughty strut
as he demands centre stage. He will alter his mask at will to appear pitiful, inept,
solicitous, concerned, or haughty and superior. Appears the the perfect father,
husband, friend - to those outside his home.
Defence Strategy: Ignore his childlike behaviours. Know his payoff is getting attention,
deceiving or abusing others. Provide him with 'supply' to avert problems.
17. THE EMOTIONAL VACUUM is the cruellest blow of all. We learn his lack of
empathy. He has deceived us by his cunning ability to mimic human emotions. We
are left numbed by the realization. It is incomprehensible and painful. We now
remember times we saw his cold vacant eyes and when he showed odd reactions.
Those closest to him become objectified and expendable.
Defence Strategy: Face the reality. They can deceive trained professionals.
18. THE SAINTLY NARCISSIST proclaims high moral standing. Accuses others of
immorality. "Hang 'em high" he says about the murderer on the 6:00 news. This
hypocrite lies, cheats, schemes, corrupts, abuses, deceives, controls, manipulates
and torments while portraying himself of high morals.
Defence Strategy: Learn the red flags of behaviour. Be suspicious of people claiming
high morals. Can be spotted at a church near you.
19. THE CALLING-CARD NARCISSIST forewarns his targets. Early in the
relationship he may 'slip up' revealing his nature saying "You need to protect yourself
around me" or "Watch out, you never know what I'm up to." We laugh along with him
and misinterpret his words. Years later, coping with the devastation left behind, his
victims recall the chilling warning.
Defence Strategy: Know the red flags and be suspicious of the intentions of others.
20. THE PENITENT NARCISSIST says "I've behaved horribly, I'll change, I love you,
I'll go for therapy." Appears to 'come clean' admitting past abuse and asking
forgiveness. Claims we are at fault and need to change too. The sincerity of his words
and actions appear convincing. We learn his words are verbal hooks. He knows our
vulnerabilities and what buttons to push. We question our judgement about his
disorder. We can disregard "Fool me once..." We hope for change and minimize past
abuse. With a successful retargeting attempt, this N will enjoy his second reign of
terror even more if we allow him back in our lives.
Defence Strategy: Expect this. Self-impose a "No Contact" rule. Focus on the reality
of his disorder. Journal past abusive behaviour to remind yourself. Join our support
group.
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