Crocodile Magazine January 2017
Get a glimpse of the future in this primarily blue and purple edition of the Really Independent Florida Crocodile!
Get a glimpse of the future in this primarily blue and purple edition of the Really Independent Florida Crocodile!
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STUDENT MIRACULOUSLY<br />
DOWNLOADS ATTACHMENT<br />
ON UF WIFI<br />
The 18mb PowerPoint presentation was worth the wait.<br />
Perses<br />
<strong>Crocodile</strong> Staff Writer<br />
One lucky UF student<br />
accomplished the<br />
unthinkable task last<br />
Tuesday when he downloaded<br />
an entire email attachment on<br />
University WiFi.<br />
“When I saw that ‘Download<br />
Completed’ notification I<br />
honestly thought I might cry,”<br />
Said 22-year-old Biology<br />
student Mark Levi.<br />
“It was a miracle. Too bad I’m<br />
not in that class anymore.”<br />
Levi said that the attachment<br />
was a PowerPoint for his General<br />
Psychology course that he<br />
had attempted to download<br />
in February before an exam,<br />
and must have left open on<br />
his computer for the past six<br />
months.<br />
“I actually ended up having to<br />
drop the class because I got a 27<br />
on my exam,”<br />
Levi said, holding a framed<br />
copy of the 13-page PowerPoint.<br />
“Back then I really thought<br />
that the UF internet connection<br />
had let me down, but hey better<br />
late than never!”<br />
According to UF records, Levi<br />
is the first student in 18 months<br />
to successfully download an<br />
attachment without using an<br />
iPhone hotspot or having to<br />
staff@thecrocodile.org<br />
Opening the attachment was a catharsis beyond imagination.<br />
wait in line at the help desk<br />
for 45 minutes. Levi’s peers<br />
said that while they are happy<br />
for their friend, some think he<br />
is less deserving of such an<br />
accomplishment.<br />
“I think it’s great that Mark<br />
finally got to see that PowerPoint<br />
that ruined his life and all,”<br />
Said Levi’s roommate, 21-yearold<br />
Danny Hurder.<br />
“But why couldn’t it have<br />
been me? I’ve got a Med<br />
School application that’s been<br />
uploading for three days.”<br />
Levi said that at one point<br />
he almost switched to a new<br />
Macbook Pro he got as a<br />
Christmas present, but said<br />
he knew he couldn’t give up<br />
on reaching his goal of finally<br />
opening his PowerPoint.<br />
“Daddy didn’t raise no<br />
quitter,”<br />
Levi said.<br />
“Sure I had to give the Mac to<br />
my sister, but all the times the<br />
internet gave out in the middle<br />
of a quiz is worth it for this<br />
moment.”<br />
UF’s Internet Technology<br />
Department said that they plan<br />
to celebrate the monumental<br />
occasion by giving Levi a $100<br />
giftcard to RadioShack and a<br />
free copy of Word ’95.<br />
18 <strong>January</strong> <strong>2017</strong> Page 18, wow, farther than you made it in that history textbook
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