Weeds Meads and Steeds PDF
After an alcoholic wizard accidentally curses a forest, it’s up to a group of misfit adventurers to set things right. There’s Dranden, a saddle maker wanting to boost his business; Belfast, a ruggedly handsome man who is also dangerously clumsy; Toble, a smelly, disgusting goblin who wants to do some good with his miserable, wretched existence; Rendle, a dull-witted academic who’s entirely obsessed with amphibians; and finally Zelendra, a half-elf priestess who ran away from home in search of true love. But their relatively easy quest of chopping down an infected tree quickly turns dangerous as they uncover a deeply sinister plot that’s bigger and far more ancient than any of them could imagine. With the entire kingdom at risk these brave souls must battle an ice elemental, survive their evil twins, traverse the shadow realm, and destroy a rampaging monster; all while tripping over, getting lucky, or taking naps – whatever works! They learn how to set aside their differences and grapple with life’s big questions such as; can you trust your perception of reality, is chasing after love a noble pursuit, what are the metaphysics of luck, and do frogs taste better than chickens?
After an alcoholic wizard accidentally curses a forest, it’s up to a group of misfit adventurers to set things right. There’s Dranden, a saddle maker wanting to boost his business; Belfast, a ruggedly handsome man who is also dangerously clumsy; Toble, a smelly, disgusting goblin who wants to do some good with his miserable, wretched existence; Rendle, a dull-witted academic who’s entirely obsessed with amphibians; and finally Zelendra, a half-elf priestess who ran away from home in search of true love.
But their relatively easy quest of chopping down an infected tree quickly turns dangerous as they uncover a deeply sinister plot that’s bigger and far more ancient than any of them could imagine. With the entire kingdom at risk these brave souls must battle an ice elemental, survive their evil twins, traverse the shadow realm, and destroy a rampaging monster; all while tripping over, getting lucky, or taking naps – whatever works!
They learn how to set aside their differences and grapple with life’s big questions such as; can you trust your perception of reality, is chasing after love a noble pursuit, what are the metaphysics of luck, and do frogs taste better than chickens?
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PAI NFUL NEW S<br />
have infiltrated their language. Toble's name is two words combined; 'toe' <strong>and</strong><br />
'bool'. Toe must refer to his missing big toe, a distinguishing feature of his.”<br />
“When I was young,” Toble's high pitched goblin-voice pierced the air as he<br />
explained, “I stood too close to a shaman's cutting board. A knife fell down <strong>and</strong><br />
sliced it clean off.” Toble reached down <strong>and</strong> patted his left toe stub in<br />
recollection.<br />
“Yes, <strong>and</strong> the word 'bool', I believe, is the goblin word for 'many tongues'.”<br />
Pournel stroked his beard in thought.<br />
“So he has many tongues.” Zelendra stuck her tongue out in disgust.<br />
Toble stuck his tongue out to mimic her <strong>and</strong> looked down at the dark purple<br />
slimy thing. “Na, I haf unly un' tunguuh.”<br />
“It actually means that he's multilingual.” Pournel explained. “You see, it's<br />
rather complicated to go into, but goblins are unique ethereal creatures that are<br />
very susceptible to nature's r<strong>and</strong>omness, causing them to have a variety of odd<br />
quirks, so to speak. Toble's quirk is having the ability to learn <strong>and</strong> decipher<br />
languages at a remarkable pace.”<br />
“You're not seriously considering taking it along?” Dr<strong>and</strong>en asked.<br />
“No, I'm not considering it.” Pournel said with a twinkle in his eye. “I've<br />
already decided <strong>and</strong> will do just that.”<br />
“But it's a goblin.” Zelendra protested. “A gross, disgusting, smelly, rotting,<br />
gooey, evil goblin.”<br />
“They are not evil,” Pournel said defensively, “not inherently if that's what<br />
you mean. Wizards for the longest time used to prefer goblins as workshop<br />
helpers because of their peculiar nature, but orcs <strong>and</strong> sorcerers also use them,<br />
twisting them for war or some other maniacal purpose, so they've gotten a pretty<br />
bad reputation.”<br />
“But, don't they eat humans?” Dr<strong>and</strong>en asked.<br />
“They eat all manner of food, <strong>and</strong> besides, humans have eaten other humans,<br />
so that's no excuse to discount all goblins.”<br />
“Has this goblin eaten humans?” Zelendra asked.<br />
“Well...” Pournel moved his eyes across the room. “Ask him yourself.”<br />
The group turned to Toble who stood there closing his eyes as if it made him<br />
invisible. Opening up <strong>and</strong> seeing the group staring at him, Toble slouched over<br />
<strong>and</strong> trembled slightly.<br />
“Toble,” Belfast asked, “have you ever eaten a human?”<br />
Gulping loudly, Toble quivered with his answer. “The orcs usually got all<br />
the meat, I only got the spare parts.”<br />
“That's it! I refuse to travel with this – thing.” Zelendra said, pointing<br />
accusingly at Toble.<br />
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