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High Maintenance
By: Susan Goldfein / Susan’s Unfiltered Wit
This will be short and sweet because I have to
run off to a doctor’s appointment.
I don’t remember if it’s the dermatologist or the
ophthalmologist. I’ll have to consult my calendar
so I don’t wind up waiting an hour in the wrong office.
I also have to check my wallet to make sure I replaced my insurance
card after the last doctor’s visit, and that I have cash, check, or credit
card for the co-pay. Oh, and I’d better verify the status of my underwear,
just in case today’s appointment turns out to be with the gynecologist.
It is now check-up season.
My car also receives regular check-ups. But I take it to one place
and they examine all the moving parts. People, on the other hand, are
required to see specialists. Hence, I’m spending the equivalent of an
entire month rotating among medical offices.
I don’t think it’s my imagination, but with every passing year the
maintenance lists seems to grow longer. This year, due to shoulder
surgery, I added an orthopedist.
Last year I added a retinologist, who, after the exam, suggested I see
my ophthalmologist who forwarded me to an optometrist. I also added
a cardiologist. Or was that the year before?
Some visits I don’t mind so much. For example, seeing
the dermatologist is definitely less stressful than a visit to the
gastroenterologist. After all, the only preparation required is that I
remove my makeup, rather than the contents of my intestines.
The radiologist’s office was kind enough to send me a letter to remind
me it was time for my annual mammogram. I’m not sure whether I
will squeeze that in (pun intended) before or immediately after I see
the dentist.
I also have a podiatrist on the payroll, but he had his turn last month.
The periodontist shall have to wait until next month. And I better get to
that orthopedist before he leaves for vacation.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining, only observing. I’m
grateful that, so far, all outcomes have been good. And I shall continue
to do what it takes to keep it that way.
I just don’t understand how someone who feels so young could have
body parts that are apparently so old. (Except for my left shoulder,
which is brand new!)
Susan Goldfein’s newest book, How to Complain When There’s
Nothing to Complain About, is available at Amazon.com, BN.com,
Read her blog at: www.SusansUnfilteredWit.com. Email Susan:
SusanGoldfein@aol.com.
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