Under_The_Whispering_Door_by_TJ_Klune

“I … don’t know?” His own words confused him. There were many, many
things he wanted, but each sounded more trivial than the last. And that was
the rub, wasn’t it? A life built upon inconsequential things made important
simply because he desired them to be.
Hugo didn’t look disappointed. If anything, Wallace’s answer seemed to
calm him further. “It’s okay not to know. In a way, it makes things easier.”
“How?”
Hugo settled his hands into his lap. Apollo lowered his snout to his paws,
though he kept his gaze trained on Hugo, blinking slowly, tail curled around
his haunches. “Because it’s harder to convince someone of what they need
versus what they want. We often ignore the truth because we don’t like what
it shows us.”
“Alan.”
“I’m trying,” Hugo said. “I really am. But I don’t know if I’m getting
through to him. It’s only been a few days, but he feels further away than he
did when he first arrived.” His mouth twisted down. “It’s like Cameron all
over again, only worse because there’s no one trying to undermine my work.”
Wallace startled. “They’re not your fault.”
“Aren’t they? They came to me because I’m the one who’s supposed to
help them. But no matter what I say, no matter what I do, they can’t listen.
And I don’t blame them for that. It’s like a panic attack. I can try to explain it
to you, but unless you’ve ever had one yourself, you’ll never understand just
how harsh they can be. And though I’m surrounded by death, I can never
understand what it does to a person because I’ve never died.”
“You’re better than most,” Wallace said.
Hugo squinted at him. “Another compliment, Wallace?”
“Yes,” Wallace said, picking at the frayed ends of his jeans.
“Ah. Thank you.”
“I could never be you.”
“Of course not,” Hugo said. “Because you’re you, and that’s who you’re
supposed to be.”
“That’s not what I meant. You do what you do, and I can’t even begin to
imagine the toll it takes. This gift you have … it’s beyond me. I don’t think I
could ever be strong enough to be a ferryman.”
“You underestimate yourself.”