Focus on the Family Magazine - June/July 2023

Helping Families
Thrive in Christ JUNE / JULY 2023

Healing From
Unresolved Trauma
free video series
——
Many people initially dismiss the
idea that they have trauma, not
realizing that traumatic events have
many different forms and magnitudes.
Whether big or small, your brain
processes all trauma as significant
and your body has one instinct when
triggered: protection.
But there’s good news! Our minds can be healed,
and our stories can be rewritten.
In this free six-part video series called Healing From Unresolved Trauma, registered
psychotherapist and Hope Restored counsellor Tara Lalonde will help you understand
how unresolved trauma affects you and how you can experience healing in your life.
SIGN UP FOR FREE TODAY!
<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/UnresolvedTrauma

In Every Issue
4 LETTER FROM THE PRESIDENT 23 ADULT KIDS
5 MINISTRY SPOTLIGHT
40 FAMILY MEMORY VERSE
8 HACKS & FACTS
44 EXTENDED FAMILY
Contents
46 MY THRIVING FAMILY
JUNE / JULY
MONKEY BUSINESS-ADOBE STOCK
Kids & Teens
12 LESSONS IN FAILURE
Teaching my kids to find
purpose in the mess-ups of life
by Stephen Miller
18 ADVENTURES IN COMICS
Join Whit and the gang for
bonus Adventures in Odyssey
stories in an exciting new format
by Bob Smithouser
24 A PARENT’S GUIDE TO BEREAL
by Adam Holz
Couples
26 YOUR PRESENCE IS REQUESTED
Accept the invitation to spend
time with God as a couple
by Levi Lusko
28 SUMMER CHALLENGE:
MARRIAGE EDITION
Conquer this list of
fun to-do’s to help you
connect with your spouse
by Andrea Gutierrez
32 BALANCING ACT
Prioritizing your marriage
during the parenting years
by Gary Thomas
Faith &
Inspiration
36 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
CELEBRATES 40 YEARS
Follow the timeline from 1983
to today to see how families in
Canada are being helped
41 BIBLE READING
IN THE BUSYNESS
How overwhelmed parents
can find time for God’s Word
by Wendy Speake
JUNE / JULY 2023
FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA 3

LETTER FROM THE PRESIDENT
Jean-Paul Beran is
president of <strong>Focus</strong> on
the Family Canada.
4
a summer of
celebration!
WE HAVE SO MUCH to celebrate at
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada and I’m pleased
to share some big news with you!
First of all, we are celebrating 40 years of
helping families thrive in Canada! In 1983,
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada began in a oneroom
office in Vancouver, BC, with only one
part-time employee. Now we are a wellestablished
national organization with over
70 staff stretching from Vancouver Island all
the way to the Maritimes. It is our honour to
strengthen families at every stage of life by
providing resources and support based on
Christian principles.
Th e <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Broadcast has been around since the
beginning. Our website <strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca is filled with original
Canadian articles, PDF downloads, video series and more. Unique to
Canada, we serve francophone families with our <strong>Focus</strong> Famille ministry
(<strong>Focus</strong>Famille.ca) and help parents with our free Kids of Integrity lessons
(KidsOfIntegrity.com). Turn to page 36 to learn more about how we’re
here for families like yours!
We are excited to continue growing and expanding our ministry to families
in the years to come—which brings me to my second piece of big news.
As of March 1, 2023, <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada officially has a retreat
centre in Ontario! It has long been our dream to bring the successful Hope
Restored marriage intensives, as well as our Kerith Ministry Leaders
Retreats, to Ontario and Eastern Canada. For many years we have held these
programs at our centres in Alberta (Kerith Creek) and Manitoba (Kerith
Pines) and it is my privilege to say we can now add Kerith Waters in Ontario
to that list! (Read more about this exciting development on the next page!)
I hope you can sense our excitement about celebrating this significant
milestone and expanding our reach to bring help and hope to even more
families in Canada. It is my honour to serve in this ministry and support
families like yours. If we can help you and your family in anyway, I invite
you to visit our website at <strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca, email us at info@fotf.ca
or call our team at 1.800.661.9800.
And as we move forward into a new chapter at <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family
Canada, I would like to ask for your prayers. There are so many people
who need the hope of Christ in their lives and in their relationships, but we
can’t do this without the prayerful support of people like you. Thank you!
Blessings,
Jean-Paul Beran
FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
JUNE / JULY 2023
CLINT BARGEN PHOTOGRAPHY
president Jim Daly
focus canada president Jean-Paul Beran
chief operating officer Ken Windebank
chief marketing & content officer
Tim Sawer
editorial director Sheila Seifert
managing editor Andrea Gutierrez
copy chief Scott DeNicola
associate editors Sarah Brickens, Faith
Wismer
contributing editors Vance Fry, Marianne
Hering, Jennifer Lonas, Jeff Masching
art director Anneka Jack
designer Sally Dunn
cover <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada
media publishing director Kevin Shirin
editorial assistant Kat Bittner
print production Gail Wise
circulation Erika Lynch
focus canada contributors
Shuwen Chang, Amy Van Veen
Thank you!
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family provides this magazine and
other resources through the generosity of friends
like you. <strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/Donate
For a subscription, go to <strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/
Magazine.
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family magazine June/July 2023, Vol. 8,
No. 3 ISSN 2471-5921, © 2023 <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family.
All rights reserved. Published by <strong>Focus</strong> on the
Family, a nonprofit organization recognized for
tax-deductible giving by the federal government.
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family is a federally registered
trademark of <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family.
To notify us of an address change or to contact <strong>Focus</strong>
on the Family Canada: 1-800-661-9800; 19946 80A
Ave, Langley, BC, V2Y 0J8; info@fotf.ca.
Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are
from the Holy Bible, English Standard Version ® (ESV ® ).
Copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry
of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All
rights reserved. The ESV text may not be quoted in
any publication made available to the public by a
Creative Commons license. The ESV may not be
translated in whole or in part into any other
language. ESV Text Edition: 2016.
IMPORTANT NOTICE! By submitting letters and other
materials, you agree 1) they become the property
of <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family and will not be returned;
2) <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family, its assigns and licensees,
have been granted the nonexclusive right to use
and/or reproduce the materials in any manner for
any purpose. Our agreement is made in Colorado
and controlled by Colorado law.
Send author submissions to
<strong>Focus</strong>MagSubmissions@family.org.
REPRINT PERMISSION:
<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.com/Permissions
Website references do not constitute blanket
endorsement or complete agreement by <strong>Focus</strong> on
the Family with information or resources offered at
or through those sites.
Return undeliverable Canadian addresses to:
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family, 19946 80A Avenue, Langley, BC
V2Y 0J8; 800-661-9800; info@fotf.ca;
GST# 10684 5969 RT0001
Printed in the U.S.A. Paper manufactured by a mill that
practices sustainable forestry.

MINISTRY
spotlight
Highlighting one of
the many ministries
of <strong>Focus</strong> on the
Family Canada
With almost 40 per cent of the Canadian population living
in Ontario and another 27 per cent living in Quebec and the
Maritime provinces, the need to provide on-the-ground help
to families in Ontario and Eastern Canada is significant. For
over five years, <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada has looked for
an appropriate location in Ontario to hold our retreat programs,
especially the Hope Restored marriage intensives.
In 2020 <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada began a partnership
with Nestleton Waters Inn, located just east of Port Perry
and only an hour away from Toronto. A year later, the owners
asked if <strong>Focus</strong> Canada would be interested in purchasing
the property. After much prayer and discernment, <strong>Focus</strong>
on the Family Canada took possession of this property on
March 1, 2023.
This location is the third retreat centre for <strong>Focus</strong> on the
Family Canada and is renamed Kerith Waters, in keeping
with our other centres: Kerith Creek in Alberta and Kerith
Pines in Manitoba.
The name “Kerith” comes from 1 Kings 17 when the Lord
sent Elijah to the Kerith Ravine after he made a prophetic
declaration to the kingdom of Ahab. God knew Elijah’s calling
would consume his energy and leave him weary, so he
provided him times of rest, solitude and renewal. Like its
biblical namesake, Kerith Waters—like Kerith Creek and
Kerith Pines—values this stillness and provides care to those
who are weary.
Kerith Waters is a 96-acre rural farm with an inn that
includes seven suites, a two-bedroom carriage house, and
a separate suite for the on-site facility manager overlooking
a spring-fed pond. The location is within a two-hour drive
for more than nine million people. This makes it an ideal
location for hosting <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada’s retreat
programs as it’s a quiet, peaceful location yet easily accessible
to a large group of people.
Right now, Hope Restored marriage intensives are being
held at Kerith Waters with plans to hold Kerith Ministry
Leader Retreats and Marriage Enrichment Retreats by the
fall of 2023.
Want to learn more? Visit <strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/
KerithOntario to see Wendy Kittlitz, Vice-President of
Counselling and Care at <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada,
explain how this third retreat centre came to be.
“The Lord is my shepherd;
I shall not want. He makes me
lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.
He restores my soul.”
• PSALM 23:1-2 •
Visit <strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/
KerithOntario to learn more.
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
5

COUPLES / COMMUNICATION
the tortoise and the shark
A marriage insight from <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family
international leadership
BY JOANNA KOH-HOE AS TOLD TO PAIGE ELLERMETS
MY HUSBAND, GARY, AND I ARE TOTAL
OPPOSITES. That’s particularly evident in our differing
conflict styles: He’s a tortoise, and I’m a shark.
Early on in our marriage, we realized that we must choose
to complement each other in the way we handle arguments.
Specifically, we set up two ground rules that we try to rely on
as we resolve disagreements:
Determine the when. Even though I prefer to address a
conflict right away, Gary needs time to process before getting
into the discussion. The more I push him, the more he withdraws.
Ultimately, we agreed that he gets to decide how much
time he needs before we talk about an issue. His commitment
is that we will not avoid it and we will talk about it before we
go to bed.
Decide on the how. Again, because I’m the more headstrong
personality, my tone can become an issue when
we have a disagreement. This second ground rule is an
understanding that if Gary mentions that the discussion is
becoming too intense, I will not take offense, but instead step
back so I don’t push him further into a corner.
We haven’t always practiced these ground rules perfectly.
There have been occasions when I failed to give Gary advance
notice of something I wanted to discuss. So we revisit the
ground rules often and recognize that when and how we talk
through our differences has been a large part of loving each
other well. •
Joanna Koh-Hoe is the CEO of <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Singapore. She and
Gary have been married for 22 years.
JEFFREY TOH; GOOD GOODS-ADOBE STOCK; ATLANTIS-ADOBE STOCK
Gary and Joanna Koh-Hoe
CREDIT TK
6 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

SWEENSHOTS & SHAYMONE-STOCKSY UNITED
Kids & Teens
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
7

hf
KIDS & TEENS / FATHER’S DAY
living letters
For an original card for Dad, the kids worked together
planning and arranging themselves in the yard, lying
down in the grass to form each letter that spelled out
“We Love You, Dad!” I stood on a stepladder and took
photos of each “letter,” printed them out and glued them
to a poster board. It was a huge hit with Dad. The finished
product has since found a prominent place in our home,
and it never fails to attract the attention of visitors.
—Jesse Neve
the sweetest gift
My husband prefers that we keep
Father’s Day gifts edible. He has a serious
sweet tooth and an aversion to
clutter! So last year my 3-year-old
daughter and I made him chocolate
cupcakes. She frosted them as artfully
and enthusiastically as a toddler
can, and then we arranged them on the
counter so that they spelled “DAD.” As
a bonus, my husband was able to enjoy
a few hours to himself while we were
occupied in the kitchen.
—Katherine Mixon
LUIZA LAFFITTE
a board
game of
memories
My kids made a personalized board game that
they called On the Road. They fashioned the
board after Monopoly, but they put their unique
spin on the properties by customizing the board
with hotels and people’s homes we’ve stayed at
while traveling. They also added favorite cafés
where we’ve shared meals and made memories.
The kids decorated the board, cut out activity
cards and hand-colored paper money. They
laughed a lot as they dreamed up ideas for the
penalty cards:
-Ate too many samples at the hotel buffet.
Skip a turn.
-You ate all the popcorn at the theater. Pay $25.
-Forgot to close the car topper. Go to jail.
I was proud of them for sticking with it when
the project turned into a much longer job than
anticipated. Their time was rewarded the minute
their dad opened his gift. He loved it.
We still have Monopoly on our game shelf, but
it gets passed over every time for the homemade
version.
—Julia Springman
8 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

FATHER’S DAY / KIDS & TEENS
hf
FOTF-ANNEKA JACK
our father, our hero
fish and
snacks
My husband loves to fish, so for
Father’s Day last year the kids and I
filled the compartments of a small
plastic container with gummy
worms and candy fish. He loved
it. Not only was it a fun snack, but
he was also able to reuse the container
for some of his fishing gear.
—Courtney Roberts
One of my husband’s favorite Father’s Day
presents is the story the kids wrote for him
about why they love him and why he’s
their hero. He later took it to work and
proudly push-pinned the gift to his bulletin
board. Those encouraging words remind
him at work how much his family loves
him.
—Courtney Smith
date with Dad
One year my kids offered their father the
gift of quality time. Each child purchased
a gift card to a place they love to visit and
attached a note saying that it was for a
one-on-one date with Dad. This ended up
being their dad’s favorite gift of all.
—Shelly Snead
x marks the coffee stop
One Father’s Day, the kids created an adventure
map of coffee shops they wanted to
take their coffee-loving father to. They
printed a map of our town and marked
the various cafés. Then they smooshed the
paper in used coffee grounds, soaked it in
tea and crumpled it, and then I burnt the
paper along the edges. By the end, they had
created a Father’s Day adventure map that
looked as if it came straight out of a movie.
Their dad loved navigating the map to all the
coffee spots and sharing these little adventures
with the kids.
—Amy Traurig
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
9

hf
KIDS & TEENS / SUMMERTIME DISCUSSIONS
roadside encounters
growth in the garden
Summer gardening is a good way for our family
to build memories. At first, our two youngest
sons didn’t relish the idea of putting their hands
in the dirt. However, they helped transfer seedlings
and subsequently witnessed the successes
and failures of our efforts.
Our time together led to discussions about
how different people require differing degrees
of care, just as plants do. A small container
would never accommodate a young fruit tree.
Overwatering the cactus would cause it to rot.
The boys seemed to easily grasp the importance
of differing care when it comes to the health of
plants and people.
—Stephanie Rodda
Our family of six is on the road a lot during the summer.
We often see people who are homeless or
asking for money. These encounters give our family
the opportunity to pray for others and talk about
mercy, need, grace, ways to help, things to pray for
and God’s love and care. These discussions might
seem forced at home, but when our children actually
see people with needs, our conversations become
meaningful—and can lead to ways to serve others.
—Jolene Ceravalo
family fun run
Every summer we have a casual Family 1K Fun Run. We
prep the kids beforehand, and they know we will run,
get a treat and talk as a family.
We jog from our house, going as slow as needed.
There’s something about jogging and not looking at
each other that helps some of our kids open up. As
we run, the older kids chat about what they enjoyed
from the summer, and sometimes they share fears about
the upcoming school year.
After the run, we continue our conversation and often
include weightier topics such as how to live for God in the
coming season. We end our time together with a family
prayer. This Fun Run is an easy, low-pressure way to bring
up great discussions with the kids.
—Kristin Wynalda
LUIZA LAFFITTE
10 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

FAITH / KIDS & TEENS
hf
blessings from a to z
While we head to the pool or venture out on road
trips during the summer, we play an easy alphabet
game. For every letter of the alphabet, we try to state
an attribute of God or name a blessing He has given
us. Next, we name family members, friends, teachers
and neighbors, and pray for them. The time passes
quickly when everyone remembers God’s character,
His blessings and our friends.
—Joanna Heiser
backyard VBS
For the past three summers, our family
has hosted a one-day vacation Bible
school. Our kids enjoy picking out decorations,
coloring invitations to give to
neighborhood children, blowing up
balloons and making signs. They invite
their friends and help where needed.
Each child plays a vital role in our family’s
ministry, and they all look forward to
this fun, Christ-centered day.
—Monica Vernot
(PHOTO) CARA DOLAN-STOCKSY UNITED; ANNEKA JACK-FOTF
around age 7,
children can learn these faith facts:
You can be sure God is real.
The Bible is true; it is God’s
Word, and you can trust it.
God wants you to learn and grow
and become like Jesus.
source: <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Parents’ Guide to
the Spiritual Growth of Children, 2000
sprouting
faith
Last summer, my children and I planted
seeds in small cups. We labeled one
cup “Sun & Water,” a second cup “Sun,
No Water” and a third cup “Water, No
Sun.” We placed the first cup in a sunny
window and watered the seeds regularly.
We put the second cup in the
same sunny spot, but we did not water
the soil. We watered the third cup regularly
but stored it in a dark closet.
After several weeks, we examined the
cups and discussed what we observed.
In the Sun & Water cup, the seeds
sprouted and grew. But the other
two seed cups did not germinate.
I asked my children to speculate why
we got those results. Then I likened
each cup to our spiritual growth. Just
as the seeds with no water or light did
not grow, we will not grow spiritually if
we’re not fed. But when a seed is tended
to, growth happens. I told my kids that
our relationship with the Lord grows
through reading and meditating on His
Word, through prayer, and through participating
in church community. Then
we brainstormed other ways to grow
stronger in our relationship with the
Lord.
—Kim Van Dunk
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
11

KIDS & TEENS / RESILIENCY
Lessons
Failure
in
Teaching my kids to
find purpose in the
mess-ups of life
BY STEPHEN MILLER
PHOTOS BY MICAH KANDROS
The Miller family
12 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

RESILIENCY / KIDS & TEENS
IF IT‘S TRUE THAT IT TAKES
10,000 HOURS TO BE AN
EXPERT AT SOMETHING,
then I’m confident I’ve clocked
enough hours to be considered a professional
failure artist. My wife and
children have been active witnesses to
the majority of my many missteps.
Some failures were trivial, while
others nearly cost me my life—like on
the fateful day I was stacking metal
horse stalls during my shift at the
rodeo arena. I nearly met my gruesome
end after somehow pinning
myself between a stack of disassembled
panels and the 3,500-pound
dinosaur of a forklift I hadn’t learned
to respect.
Other failures were less perilous.
For example, I’ve put my foot in my
mouth so many times that I think I’ve
acquired a taste for it. Once I told
my wife in a heated discussion not
to yell because it was—and I quote—
“not becoming” of her. (And here I’d
thought that telling my wife to calm
down was the worst line I could pull
from my bag of word tricks.)
Still, I’m thankful for many of my
failures. Because my kids have gotten
to see me fall on my face—and then
get back up, learning from each misadventure.
I want to show them that
failure has been the best coach, mentor
and personal trainer that my effort
could buy.
I’ve learned three liberating truths
along the way that have guided me
through all my mess-ups. These truths
are helping me give my kids a framework
for failing well and developing
resiliency.
Truth #1:
Failures don‘t define us
When my kids get it wrong—and they
will because they’re human—I want
them to know that failure is not their
identity. Still-greasy dishes stacked
in the cabinets on the kids’ night for
dish duty or a call from a teacher telling
us that one of our kids is struggling
in school are teachable moments. They
may have failed, but they are not failures.
They may have messed up, but
they are not mess-ups.
I understand that the doubt-filled
questions my kids ask themselves can
feed their fear of failure.
What if I say the wrong thing?
What if people laugh or think less
of me?
What if she says no?
Yes, there are natural consequences
that come from failures. But my job as
a dad is to remind my children that our
failures can’t rob us of our God-given
identity and purpose. Rather, our failures
may actually move us closer to
that purpose.
I want my kids to realize that God
might use failure to close the wrong
door that they kept trying to force
their way through or save them from
a painful relationship. He might
allow alarming consequences from
unhealthy or destructive behaviors
and beliefs so they can be set free.
continued on page 15 >>>
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
13

KIDS & TEENS / RESILIENCY
Famous Failures
BY FAITH WISMER
Have you ever considered that failure could be the
best way to discover something new? Throughout
history, people have become famous for “mistakes”
turned into successes. See if you recognize any of
these “flops”:
PENICILLIN
Bacteriologist Alexander Fleming left
a couple of petri dishes in the lab
that were covered in different bacteria
from his failed attempts to find
a “wonder drug.” Weeks later, he discovered
mold on some of the dishes.
After analyzing, he found the dishes
with the mold were clean of bacteria
while the others were still contaminated.
This “barrier” of mold killed
several strands of deadly bacteria,
which was later formed into a medicine
safe enough for the human body.
This accident led to the first antibiotic.
POST-IT NOTES
Chemist Spencer Silver was trying to
create a super-strong adhesive when
the opposite happened. The adhesive
he created was weak and only able to
stick to things temporarily. Art Fry, a
colleague of Silver’s, thought that this
“glue” could be used for bookmarks.
The two then decided that the weak
adhesive would work perfectly on
just one edge of a piece of paper.
POTATO CHIPS
Chef George Crum was working
when a guest complained that their
french fries weren’t crispy enough. So
Crum sliced potatoes incredibly thin,
fried them, topped them with salt
and sent the plate to the guest. The
guest loved the reimagined snack,
and the potato chip was created.
STAINLESS STEEL
CHOCOLATE
CHIP COOKIES
Restauranteur Ruth Wakefield, owner
of the Toll House Inn, was making
cookies when she ran out of baker’s
chocolate. To substitute, she used
sweetened chocolate broken into
small pieces. Mixing it in the dough
and baking the cookies, she expected
the chocolate to melt and was surprised
that the chocolate pieces
stayed intact. The chocolate chip
cookie is now the most popular
cookie in the world.
Scientist Harry Brearley was developing
a powerful metal that could
withstand friction inside a rifle barrel.
One day he noticed one of the metals
he’d thrown away remained shiny
while all others had rusted. Looking
back on his notes, he located the
formula he used on the test he’d
thought was a failed experiment.
From this, stainless steel was birthed.
Take a lesson from these famous
failures—and use your mistakes
to improve your situation or find
a solution.
14 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

RESILIENCY / KIDS & TEENS
Truth #2:
Failures are not final
The sun will rise again tomorrow with a
whole new chance for my kids to make
it right and build from the rubble of their
mistakes. If you burn yourself on the stove,
hopefully you’re careful grabbing a hot pan
in the future. If you get a speeding ticket,
hopefully you learn to be a safer driver.
I’ve faced prison time in court and paid
thousands of dollars in fees. But I want to
show my kids how to be honest, own up
to mistakes, take responsibility, walk with
integrity, apologize and try to make a better
decision the next time. Nothing good has
ever come from me making excuses, being
defensive, shifting blame or acting like I
don’t make mistakes because I’m the dad.
Truth #3:
Failures have the
power to refine
With guidance, children can shift their
perspective to see that a moment of failure
is happening for them rather than to
them. I want them to reframe their perspective
without rewriting the truth. Not
just moving on but moving forward with
the hard-won wisdom they earned from
their mess-up.
The failure to clean up food in their bedrooms
leads to bugs. How should they
respond? Will they be a victim? Will they
blame-shift? Or will they keep the food out
of their room?
Procrastinating leads to failed tests, and
consequently, losing privileges until they
bring up their grades. What do they do?
Blame teachers? Or do what it takes to
pull up their grades and have privileges
reinstated?
There is a real beauty to young people
taking responsibility, owning up to mistakes,
and learning and growing from
each one. They can get more out of their
mess-up than what they lost. They can let it
seed their blessings rather than feed their
fears and paralyze them with anxiety. >>>
(l to r): Liam, Jude, Ethan,
Lincoln, Reese, Keira
and Penelope
Stephen and Amanda Miller
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
15

KIDS & TEENS / RESILIENCY
My job isn’t to shame my kids.
Discipline? Sure. Correct behavior?
Absolutely. But more than that, it’s to
lift their eyes to our Savior who took
on all their fears and failures, mistakes
and mess-ups. Jesus gave them a better
identity amid their getting it wrong
than they could ever earn with all their
efforts to get it right.
I want my children to fail big, beautifully,
fast and often. Does that sound
crazy? Maybe. But it’s because I also
want them to succeed. To win. To be
the best version of themselves. And
along the way, they’ll gain a certain
resilience that only comes from failing.
Let’s do this thing
I’m always going to be my kids’ biggest
hype man. You want to change
the world? You’ve got this. You’re probably
going to get it wrong a good bit
along the way, but your mom and I are
going to be cheering you on, helping
you stand when you fall. We’re going to
challenge you and encourage you and
love you through it all.
It’s often said that the goal of parenting
is to prepare kids for the real
world. Someday they’ll move out and
get jobs and pay bills and take care
of themselves. This objective seems
overly pragmatic to me. I want to
believe the goal is to make sure my
kids feel loved and worthy—like they
matter and can do great things. I want
to raise kids who dream big and then
work hard to make those dreams a
reality. Th i sis preparing them for the
real world. •
Stephen Miller is the author of The Art of
Getting It Wrong and coproduces a popular
YouTube channel with his wife, Amanda,
where they showcase the beauty of
adoption featuring their family of nine.
Top row (l to r): Penelope,
Jude, Reese and Keira
Bottom row (l to r): Lincoln,
Stephen, Amanda,
Liam and Ethan
THE ART OF GETTING
IT WRONG
by Stephen Miller
Stephen explores what it means to
turn failures, mishaps and disappointments
into a life of fulfillment.
Shop.<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca
16 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

KIDS & TEENS
NEW
SHILOH KATT
FROM FOCUS ON THE FAMILY
EDGE OF THE GALAXY:
30 FAITH-FILLED ADVENTURES
BY BROCK EASTMAN
Brock teaches kids about God’s Word
through an entertaining story about a
family living in outer space.
Shop.<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
17

KIDS & TEENS / ADVENTURES IN ODYSSEY CLUB
adventures in comics
Join Whit and the gang for bonus Adventures
in Odyssey stories in an exciting new format
BY BOB SMITHOUSER, PRODUCER, ADVENTURES IN ODYSSEY CLUB
ILLUSTRATIONS BY BRIAN DAWSON
NEARLY 1,000 AUDIO
DRAMAS. Videos. Podcasts. Games
and activities. And now . . . comics!
That’s right. The Adventures in Odyssey
Club is introducing comic strips to its
expansive lineup.
The Adventures in Odyssey Club is a
digital streaming platform that’s geared
toward 8- to 12-year-olds—but may
bring the whole family together. It hosts
an extensive library of award-winning
audio dramas, which is the main draw
for members. Episodes began being
produced in 1987 and now span 36 years
of stories about the people in the town
of Odyssey.
The weekly comic strips are a new digital
benefit for being an Adventures in
Odyssey Club member.
On the following pages, you’ll find a
comic formerly available only to Club
members. In it, you’ll meet John Avery
Whittaker, Odyssey’s resident inventor
and the owner of a soda shop
called “Whit’s End.” Lovingly known
as “Whit,” Mr. Whittaker dispenses ice
cream and biblical advice. Meanwhile,
Bart Rathbone is the shady owner of
the Electric Palace, an electronics store.
Rodney is Bart’s son, the local bully.
Whit’s End is also home to the
Imagination Station. This exciting device
teaches life lessons and places kids
directly in the middle of historical events.
We hope you enjoy reading this short
comic adventure as a family.
Want a 14-day, free
membership to try
out the Club?
Go to AdventuresInOdyssey.com/
FreeTrial to sign up. You’ll be glad
you did.
18 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

ADVENTURES IN ODYSSEY CLUB / KIDS & TEENS
2.5" x 4"
(TEXTURE) NIKOLA-ADOBE STOCK
>>>
JUNE / JULY 2023
FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
19

KIDS & TEENS / ADVENTURES IN ODYSSEY CLUB
20 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

ADVENTURES IN ODYSSEY CLUB / KIDS & TEENS
>>>
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
21

KIDS & TEENS / ADVENTURES IN ODYSSEY CLUB
22 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

HOME FOR THE SUMMER / KIDS & TEENS
hf
Adult Kids
“
The end [of your parenting] is when [your teens]
finish high school.
That’s when they need to be ready. Even if
they stay at your house, they need to be ready.
—Dr. Kenneth Wilgus
source: From the broadcast “Parenting Teens Toward Adulthood.”
Find it at <strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/Radio.
”
a bell to come and go
When our college-age kids came home for
the summer, they resented having to tell us
every time they went out and came back
home. A simple counter bell on a table by
our front door solved the problem.
When they left, they’d hit the bell to signify
their leaving. When they returned home,
they’d ring it again. If they brought friends
home, they also needed to ring for the number
of friends entering the door, which
helped me know how many people were in
our house.
—Lori Zenker
MARTIN BERGSMA-ADOBE STOCK
expectation
adjustment
When my eldest left for school and
came back home the first summer, we
were excited to have her back. But we
quickly realized that some expectations
needed to be discussed to ensure that
everyone could enjoy the summer.
So we gathered for a family meeting.
My husband and I explained what
would work best for us in relation to
car rules and house guests. My daughter
talked about her expections, and we
made some adjustments. That summer,
we learned what worked and what
needed improvement. Overall, this
experience let everyone feel included,
heard and respected.
—Laurie Moser
privacy
protection
Adult kids home for the summer after experiencing
on-campus living still have their own rooms at
our house. Those who have moved on and have
their own residences are provided with a guest
room when they visit. This ensures privacy and
separation for everyone. We’ve set up a second
living room in the basement where my adult kids
can entertain without feeling they have to either
include or navigate around Mom and Dad.
My husband and I remain available but try
not to be offended when our kids want to hang
out with other people or want to be alone.
Sometimes managing expectations and maintaining
mutual respect for one another is tricky,
but we make it work.
—Kelly L. Ward
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
23

KIDS & TEENS / MEDIA
UPCOMING REVIEWS
For reviews of these and other titles, visit PluggedIn.com,
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family’s media review and discernment website.
INDIANA JONES
AND THE DIAL
OF DESTINY
The whip-wielding
archeologist takes
another crack at
the Nazis.
Scheduled
release:
June 30
BARBIE
Will the iconic doll find a
way to handle life in the
real world?
Scheduled
release:
July 21
ELEMENTAL
Can Ember, a girl made
of fire, get along with a
water boy named Wade?
Scheduled
release:
June 16
A PARENT’S
GUIDE TO BEREAL
BY ADAM HOLZ
THE RELATIVELY NEW
SOCIAL MEDIA APP BeReal is
being touted by many as “the authentic
Instagram”—but is it really a solid
alternative for teens?
It’s true that BeReal takes a unique
approach regarding some of social
media’s biggest issues. Adolescents often
use social media to frame their lives in the
best possible light. Staged selfies and filterenhanced
images can make someone’s
life look awesome. Add in likes and followers,
and you’ve got a recipe for self-esteem
and mental-health struggles.
BeReal, however, prompts users to take
a selfie only once per day. Users have two
minutes to respond. Then, it shares those
pictures with friends in the users’ BeReal
network. The intent is to combat teens’
temptations to post “best life now” pics of
themselves, and instead offer something
that’s more authentic.
To reinforce that intent, there aren’t
any image filters. Nor will you find follower
or like counters. If you miss your
daily window, you can still post a pic,
though you won’t have the instant connection
with BeReal besties who posted
earlier that day.
So BeReal does offer a healthier twist on
social media, but some concerns still exist:
Users can still befriend strangers.
Sexually explicit pictures are prohibited,
but the app relies on users to police problematic
content. And while the app’s
once-a-day premise solves some “fear
of missing out” problems, it could still
cause anxiety about missing your
BeReal window.
BeReal isn’t perfect. But compared
to the established competition, it
addresses some of the problems with
social media. •
Adam Holz is the director of Plugged In. He
and his wife, Jennifer, have three children.
PIXAR ANIMATION STUDIOS; PARAMOUNT PICTURES; MATTEL FILMS
24 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

JAYME BURROWS-STOCKSY UNITED
Couples
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
25

COUPLES / DEVOTIONS
your
presence
is requested
Accept the invitation
to spend time with
God as a couple
BY LEVI LUSKO
MY WIFE, JENNIE, AND I were laughing
about a conversation I had with our daughter about
how opposites attract. After explaining this concept
to her, I said, “That’s why your mom and I do so well
together; we get along because we’re so different.”
Her exact response was, “You and Mom get along?”
Ouch. Kids.
There are no perfect marriages. Not at church, not
from pastors, or therapists or neighbors who appear
to have it all together. But God isn’t asking for perfect;
He’s looking for fruitfulness. And the way to fruitfulness
is by fearing God and being intentional in your
relationship with Him. In a practical sense, it’s you
and your spouse figuring out what time with God
could look like in your marriage.
Your lives may already be full of jobs, kids, dirty
dishes, soccer practice, the gym and a million other
things competing for your attention. Where do you
and your spouse begin carving out time to spend with
the Lord as a couple? If you’re not sure how to start,
try this: Begin small, and see where God leads.
Wherever you are
Jennie and I are trying to read through the
Bible in a year. We may not be reading aloud
every morning—on the couch with coffee in
hand while the kids are quiet in their beds—
but sometimes we sit on our patio by the fire
in the evenings and read together. When we’re
able, it’s awesome.
Other times, we’re in different time zones
or just different rooms. I might be on a plane
while Jennie is home with the kids, but we’re
both finding time to read God’s Word every
day. We’re both asking God to meet with us
and speak to us. Then we catch up on what
we’ve been learning.
If your schedule lines up, you and your
spouse can sit down together or connect
through text. Maybe you read on your own
and check in periodically. Whatever you do,
the point is to simply begin.
SIMONA-ADOBE STOCK; DEAGREEZ-ADOBE STOCK
26 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

DEVOTIONS / COUPLES
CREDIT TK
What works for you
Jennie and I consider our schedules,
the season we’re in, who we are and
how God made us. We find freedom in
knowing there’s not a one-size-fits-all
approach to devotional time. You can’t
look to what’s working for another
couple and assume it’s going to
work for you.
Pick a plan. Choose a devotional or
reading plan; or maybe pick a book of
the Bible that you’ve been meaning to
learn more about. Then, just start.
Keep your ambitions realistic. Most
diets fail because the goals or changes
are too big, not too small. So don’t be
afraid to start small. The point is to
spend time with God as a couple
and in whatever form it takes for you.
And then do it again the next day.
And the next.
Like the ocean that floods the hole
you dug on the beach as a kid, God
will fill any place in your life that you
open and make available to Him.
LISTEN NOW!
Hear more from Pastor Levi Lusko
about how godly thinking can
transform your life.
<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/Radio
THE MARRIAGE DEVOTIONAL
by Levi and Jennie Lusko
It takes work to build a solid marriage, but the work is
worth it. Gain tools and godly wisdom for a marriage
that’s sweet, steady and strong.
Shop.<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca
Your presence is requested
Things that are “easy” to do are also easy not to do.
If your time with God is merely a checkbox item on
a to-do list, you’ll likely struggle to follow through.
It’s hard to make anything a priority if you’re only
doing it because you have to.
Your motivation should be to simply spend time
together with your Creator. What if you reminded
yourself every morning that the God of the universe
has your name on the palm of His hand? He knows
how many hairs are on your head. He breathed the
galaxies into existence, commands the wind and the
rain, spoke you into being—and He cares about you!
He cares about your marriage and kids, your aches
and pains and struggles. He’s extending an invitation,
a seat at His lavish dinner party, saying “Your
presence is requested.” And when that’s the fuel that
propels you to meet with Him, you reorient your
priorities and may even witness fruitfulness in all
areas of your life, including your marriage.
As you seek to live a life centered on Jesus, there
will be no limit to the peace, power, joy and fruitfulness
that come from spending time with the
Lord together. •
Levi Lusko is the founder and lead pastor of Fresh Life Church
and the bestselling author of six books. He co-authored The
Marriage Devotional with his wife, Jennie. They have one son
and four daughters, one of whom is in heaven.
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
27

COUPLES / SUMMER FUN
Summer
Challenge:
MARRIAGE EDITION
Conquer this
list of fun todo’s
to help you
connect with
your spouse
BY ANDREA GUTIERREZ
THE BALMY SUNSHINE
AND SLOWER PACE OF
SUMMER are fleeting, so here
are 40 ideas to help you capture
meaningful moments with your
spouse. These fun to-do’s aren’t in
any order, so skip around this list to
see if you can check off all of them
before summer ends.
28 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

SUMMER FUN / COUPLES
At Home and at Church
Play “your song”
and sing along.
Come up with an odd
ingredient to inspire
tonight’s dinner. Prepare
the dish together.
Plant a tree in honor
of a loved one.
Pray for your pastor.
Give your spouse the gift
of a night off, whether
to relax at home or for a
chance to get out of the
house for quiet time or
time with friends.
Volunteer together
at church.
Do a chore around
the house together that
your spouse or you
usually handle alone.
Agree to secretly do
something nice for the
other person. Leave hints
about what you want
your spouse to discover.
Create a new beverage
concoction and dare
each other to take a sip.
Drop by your spouse’s
workplace for a
surprise lunch date.
Choose a favorite Scripture
to become your family’s
summer verse.
Meet a new fellow
congregant together.
Attend service at a new
time or sit somewhere new.
Invite friends to your
house for appetizers,
prayer and worship.
Hide encouraging notes
in your spouse’s Bible,
latest book or briefcase.
Attend a church event.
Gaze at the stars, marvel
at God’s majesty and
dream about the future.
Scatter glowsticks
around your yard
during daylight hours.
At nightfall, race to
find them.
Share the Gospel together
with a stranger, family
member or friend.
Scour your memorabilia for
a photo of the two of you.
Enlarge it for your wall. If it’s
a throwback, all the better!
>>>
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
29

COUPLES / SUMMER FUN
In the
Neighborhood
Pick up trash around your
neighborhood together.
Don’t forget to bring a bag!
Picnic at every park in
your neighborhood.
Search for the silliest
item at a garage sale.
Buy it for your spouse as
an end-of-summer gift.
Play at a playground
with your kids or nieces
and nephews. Who says
you’re too old to swing
or slide?
As a couple, take a
welcome basket to
a new neighbor.
Secretly serve a neighbor
together with an act
of kindness.
Pay for a stranger’s coffee.
Buy Popsicles for the
neighborhood kids and
hand them out together.
Invite friends over for
a barbecue and play
yard games.
Get outdoors for
some exercise. Walk
or bike around your
neighborhood.
30 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

SUMMER FUN / COUPLES
Date Ideas
Around Town
Play games at the carnival
or county fair and share
a midday snack.
Have a night out. If
this was your first date,
where would you go?
Attend your town’s Canada
Day events, fireworks
show or summer festival.
Be a tourist in your own
town and visit a landmark
you’ve never seen before.
Search a thrift store
to find crazy clothes to
wear for tonight’s date
night or your next
date night together.
Tour a local museum and
develop a renewed pride
for your town’s history.
Take a silly selfie with
your town’s scenic
landmark as a backdrop.
Buy one scoop
of ice cream at all the
parlors around town
to find both of your
new favorite flavors.
Re-create a picture
from your past.
Dine at a restaurant that
starts with the same letter
as your last name.
Bonus!
LISTEN NOW!
Explore the archive of past
broadcasts and listen to one
together.
<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/Radio
Andrea Gutierrez is the
managing editor of <strong>Focus</strong>
on the Family magazine.
Her favorite summer activities
to do with her husband
include camping, cookouts
and frequenting ski resorts
during the off-season.
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
31

COUPLES / INVESTING IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP
balancing act
Prioritizing your marriage during the parenting years
BY GARY THOMAS ILLUSTRATIONS BY MICHAEL MEISTER
WHEN MY FIRST CHILD
WAS BORN, I felt miraculous
love and overwhelming terror. What
did I know about raising a baby? My
immediate obsession was her physical
safety, beginning with the perilous
drive home from the hospital. It was
only about 3 miles, but that day the trip
took 20 minutes. No telling how slippery
a completely dry road might be
when your firstborn child is nestled in
the back seat.
Fast-forward a decade or so, and I
was flinging my children into the air
in the pool. As parents, we eventually
realize that our children aren’t as fragile
as we initially thought they were.
That’s a good thing because we also
need to give some of our attention to
our spouses. If we focus only on our
parenting, our marriages can end up
weakened through neglect.
A healthy balance is needed between
the attention we give to parenting and
what we give to our marriages. To help
you find your footing in this balancing
act, here are two questions you and
your spouse can ask yourselves:
What are we
going to cut out?
When I ask first-time expectant couples
to consider this question, they wonder
what I mean.
“You’ll spend 20 to 30 hours a week
parenting,” I explain, “but you won’t
be given any extra hours in your day.
Something has to give. So be deliberate
about the changes you make and
decide what you can cut out of your
schedules.”
After the birth of their first child,
Debra and John realized that the
schedule they kept as a young married
couple wouldn’t work for them as
parents. When their third child came
along, John made a bold decision: He
found an office job five minutes from
home so he could drive home for lunch,
and he now works just three days a
week. Debra works as a counselor, so
32 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

INVESTING IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP / COUPLES
financially they were able to make the
adjustment. Even so, John’s reduced
schedule has required them to make
sacrifices, including the size of the
house they live in and the age of the
cars they drive.
To maintain a healthy marriage
during your parenting years, you may
need to sacrifice some of your visiting
time with friends and extended family,
as well as some of the activities you
enjoy. Two hours of video gaming? An
hour every night on social media? Be
deliberate about what you cut. You
can’t just welcome a baby into your
life and assume hours will magically
appear—they don’t. >>>
A QUESTION FOR PARENTS OF
CHILDREN WITH SPECIAL NEEDS
Should we sacrifice our marriage
for the sake of our child?
When you have a child with special needs, it’s easy to think you must do
everything you possibly can for that child. As parents, we’ll do anything
for our children. But sacrificing our marriage for them is the worst possible
thing we could do.
Too often, one parent will pour so much time and energy into caring for
a child with special needs that the other parent may start to feel neglected
or excluded. Making your child’s needs the center of your family never
ends well—for your marriage or your other children.
I’ve seen parents become so disconnected from each other while
caring for a child with special needs that they end up getting divorced.
That’s about the biggest spiritual blow your child could ever experience.
The best thing you and your spouse can do is to share the caregiving
challenges. Contribute what you can to your child’s welfare, but don’t
become so wrapped up in your child’s needs that you shipwreck your
marriage. Instead, as you do the best you can for your child, also focus
on cultivating a healthy marriage, loving your children equally and
leaving the rest in God’s hands. —GT
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
33

Enjoy
Adventures
in Odyssey
in so many ways!
Choose from
• audio episodes on CD
• audio downloads
• fiction books or eBooks
• devotional books or eBooks
See our full Adventures in
Odyssey collection at
Shop.<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca
What will our marriage
look like in 20 years?
My wife, Lisa, and I never looked
forward to being empty nesters; we
loved active parenting. But our emptynest
years have been especially sweet
because we’re able to focus even more
on each other. If raising children had
turned out to be the only thing keeping
us together, once they were grown,
Lisa and I would’ve been strangers.
That would have made these years
heartbreaking.
Parenting seems all-consuming, but
for most of us, it’s only a season of our
lives. Pouring everything into parenting
to the detriment of our marriage is
like sprinting the first half of a marathon
without factoring in the second half.
What will your marriage look like
in 20 years? What kind of legacy will
you leave your children as they contemplate
getting married one day? Will
they remember growing up in a broken
home or with parents who had a
healthy, loving relationship?
Raising children is among the best
experiences in life. If you’re neglectful
as a parent, you’ll have many regrets.
But if you’re neglectful as a spouse,
you’ll have regrets of a different sort.
LISTEN NOW!
Find practical help from Gary
Thomas about staying connected
with your spouse through
the storms in life.
<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/Radio
You can fall off on either end, so be
thoughtful and wise as you keep giving
more of yourself to each other even as
you give yourself to your children.
If I could give new dads one piece
of advice, it’s this: Make a solemn pact
with your wife that 20 years after the
birth of your first child, you will be
closer as a couple and even more committed
to the health of your marriage
than you are today. That’s one of the
best things you can do not only for
your marriage but also for your children.
Next to creating a home filled
with love, faith and worship, a healthy,
intimate marriage is the most fertile
spiritual environment you can provide
for your children. •
Gary Thomas is an international speaker and a
bestselling, award-winning author. One of his
many books is Sacred Parenting: How raising
children shapes our souls.

GEMMA CAN FLY-STOCKSY UNITED
Faith & Inspiration
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
35

FAITH & INSPIRATION / 40 YEARS
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada
CELEBRATES 40 YEARS!
First <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family
Broadcast airs in Canada
Radio.<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca has
an average of 194,556 visits per year
1986
Geoff Still is appointed
fi r st <strong>Focus</strong> Canada
president
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family
Canada website is launched
Nearly 11.5 million visits to
<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca since 2018
1995
Bruce Gordon
is appointed second
<strong>Focus</strong> Canada
president
1982 1997
1983
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family
Canada’s one-room office
opens in Vancouver, BC
Our staff team has grown from
one-part time employee to over
70 people today
1987
Adventures in Odyssey begins
Clubhouse and Clubhouse Jr. magazines
are launched
Over 800 episodes of Adventures in Odyssey have aired
Over 11,800 children are subscribed to receive
Clubhouse or Clubhouse Jr. magazines
1998 Dr. Darrel Reid is appointed third
<strong>Focus</strong> Canada president
36 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

40 YEARS / FAITH & INSPIRATION
FORTY YEARS AGO, <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada
started in a one-room office building in Vancouver, BC.
Since then, we have grown to be the largest global partner
of <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family, offering help and encouragement to
millions of families in Canada as they build their lives on the
foundation of Jesus Christ.
Having a great marriage and raising kids takes work. And
the truth is we could all use a helping hand at times—that’s
why <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada exists. We are committed
to strengthening families in Canada through trusted, biblically
based resources and programs, personal counselling,
prayerful support, and much more.
For the last 40 years, it has been our goal to be the
place Canadian families turn to for trusted help and
encouragement!
2000
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Canada’s
office moves to Langley, BC
2003
Clergy Care Network begins
Since it began, Clergy Care Network
has helped about 28,000 people with
free counselling
Visit ClergyCare.ca to learn more!
Kerith Creek
Alberta centre established
Over 1,400 individuals have
attended retreats and intensives
at Kerith Creek
Ministry to
francophone
families begins
<strong>Focus</strong>Famille.ca has an
average of 67,437 visits
per year
2008
2009
2004
Terence Rolston is
appointed fourth <strong>Focus</strong>
Canada president
2005
Jim Daly becomes president of
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family in the U.S.
2007
First cross-country
Parenting Matters
tour kicks off with
Dr. Tim Kimmel
Thriving Family (now <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family)
magazine begins publication
Today about 42,000 families receive <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family
magazine for free
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
37

FAITH & INSPIRATION / 40 YEARS
Grand opening of new
Langley, BC, head office
2012
First annual Together
for Adoption Canada
conference is held
2013
<strong>Focus</strong> on Marriage 2013 tour
with Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott
Together for Adoption Canada
conference
2015
The Drop Box sells out
theatres across Canada
Waiting to Belong
initiative begins
End the Wait tour with
Steven Curtis Chapman
Visit WaitingToBelong.ca
to learn more!
2010
2011
2014
Kids of Integrity
website launched
Since 2016, Kids of Integrity
lessons have been
downloaded 315,656 times
Irreplaceable sells out
theatres across the country
The Family Project launches
Kerith Pines Manitoba centre opens
Over 700 individuals have attended retreats and
intensives at Kerith Pines
38 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

40 YEARS / FAITH & INSPIRATION
2015-2016
A Lifelong Love marriage tour with Gary Thomas
2017
Brio magazine relaunches
Nearly 4,000 girls are subscribed to Brio magazine
Marriage tour with Gary Thomas;
Date Night Comedy Tour;
Marriage tour with Gary Chapman
Mully released in theatres across Canada
2019
National marriage
survey conducted
2020
Hope Restored
launched in Ontario
Kerith Waters
Ontario centre opens
2018
2023
Hope Restored marriage
intensive program launches
in Alberta/Manitoba
Marriage Enrichment
Conferences and
Retreats begin
Over 460 couples have attended Hope
Restored intensives in Canada
2021
Jean-Paul Beran is appointed
fifth <strong>Focus</strong> Canada president
Watch this video from <strong>Focus</strong> on the
Family Canada to learn more!
<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/40YearsVideo
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
39

family
memory verse
Called to freedom
BY FOCUS ON THE FAMILY STAFF
ILLUSTRATIONS BY STEPHANIE MACKAY
SUMMER IS HERE. It’s time for getting
out of the house and enjoying the fresh air and
sunshine with your children. How about memorizing
Scripture together as you travel to your
various activities? This issue’s family memory
verse, Galatians 5:13 (NiRV) is presented in an
age-appropriate translation suited for little ones
all the way up to your teenager and you.
CREDIT TK

QUIET TIME / FAITH & INSPIRATION
Bible
Reading
IN
BUSYNESS
THE
How overwhelmed parents
can fi nd time for God’s Word
BY WENDY SPEAKE ILLUSTRATIONS BY DINA RUZHA
CREDIT TK
IN MY EARLIEST DAYS OF
PARENTING, I kept a Bible on my
bedside table and another by my nursing
chair. Every morning, I’d reach for
my brown leather-bound Bible and
pick up reading where I’d left off the
day before.
Starting my blessed but busy days
with God was a natural rhythm in my
life. It influenced my words and kept me
loving my family. The ongoing reminders
of His grace helped me remain
gracious and kind.
Then I purchased my first smartphone
when my two oldest boys were 3
and 1, and I was pregnant with our third
son. Looking back, I wonder how “smart”
it was for me to get that phone during
such a busy mothering season. >>>
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
41

FAITH & INSPIRATION / QUIET TIME
Of course, at the time I didn’t know
that this device would become a distraction,
keeping me from fully being
present with my family and the Lord.
With all the ringing and dinging
and interacting with family and friends,
connecting with the Lord became
more of a struggle. Often, I found
myself reaching over my Bible for my
phone first thing in the morning. Even
when I intentionally opened my Bible
app, I became unintentionally distracted
by notifications.
Now, more than a decade later,
I find I’m not alone in this struggle.
Many Bible-believing moms are not
Bible-reading moms. Distractions,
exhaustion, laziness and even hopelessness
threaten our faithfulness and
leave us feeling helpless.
I’ve since regained a rhythm to my
mornings and realigned my priorities
using three simple ways to become a
Bible-reading mom once again.
Seek God first
Many parents struggle with seeking the
Lord first thing in the morning because
their children always seem to rise
before they do. There’s a Scripture that
speaks of bringing God “the best of
the firstfruits of your ground” (Exodus
34:26). While this verse is about offering
God the produce of the land, I love
the application to our busy lives.
When we offer God the firstfruits,
or earliest moments, of each day, we
are telling Him that we trust Him to
guide us through our entire day. As a
result, we parent our kids more like our
heavenly Father parents us, with the
fruit of His Spirit on display in our lives.
You may not be able to offer God
the first moments of your day if you
have little ones requiring your attention.
But as soon as you’ve taken care
of your children’s needs and have a
few moments of your own, offer those
moments to the Lord.
“The Word before the world” has
become my morning motto. Before I
engage the world online, I make sure
I’ve opened myself up to the One who
made the world and set me very purposefully
in it.
In Matthew 6:33, Jesus invites us
to “seek first the kingdom of God and
his righteousness, and all these things
will be added to you.” I like to think of
it this way: Seek God first, and everything
else will fall into its rightful place.
Unfortunately, when we turn our
attention to other things first, our affection
for Christ falls from first place to
a distant second. Whether your phone
or your friends or your morning trip to
Starbucks is tempting you to veer
off course, commit to keeping
God first in your life.
Snack on God’s Word
throughout the day
As a parent, you’re probably wonderful
at packing crackers and sippy cups
when you’re on the go with your children.
Consider bringing God’s Word
with you as well. If a verse or passage
resonates with you during your morning
Bible reading, jot it on a note card
and tuck it in your pocket or purse, or
highlight it in your Bible app, and then
meditate on it throughout the day.
Another way to recall God’s Word is
listening to an audio Bible while you’re
driving or doing chores. You can pause
it when you’re interrupted, and even if
you listen only a few minutes each day,
those moments will be well spent.
Reading and rereading Scripture
shapes not only our lives but also the
lives of our children as they watch us
and learn from us. Modeling a love for
God’s Word is one of the most powerful
things we can do in our homes.
Then as our children grow, we want to
invite them into God’s Word with us.
CREDIT TK
42 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

QUIET TIME / FAITH & INSPIRATION
Serve up the Word
Some moms and dads feel unsure
about sharing God’s Word with their
children, but here’s something I’m
absolutely sure of: If you have a Bible,
you have everything you need to open
up rich conversations with your kids
about God and His plan for them. You
don’t need to have a thorough knowledge
of the biblical narrative from
Genesis to Revelation, and you don’t
need to know how to apply it to every
aspect of your life. The Holy Spirit,
who inspired the writing of the Word,
will inspire you.
If your kids are young, consider
leading them through a children’s
storybook Bible with engaging pictures
and age-appropriate text. As
your children get older, transition into
reading the Bible together. Start in the
Gospels and keep your reading time
short when they’re young.
At the end of each day’s passage,
ask them these simple questions:
• What did you learn about God?
• What did you learn about yourself?
• How should you live differently as a
result?
Keeping your time in God’s Word
simple will help you make Biblereading
a family habit, whether in the
morning at the breakfast table or in
bed at the end of each day. Keep it
simple so you can simply keep at it,
day after day, with the children the
Lord has entrusted to you.
Remember that Bible-believing
moms and dads who are Bible-reading
moms and dads should ultimately
become Bible-leading moms and dads.
Let’s lead our children to believe and
read the Word for themselves as they
grow to love God too. •
Wendy Speake is the author of several books,
including The 40-Day Social Media Fast and
The 40-Day Feast, which invites parents not
only to read God’s Word for themselves but
also to serve it up to their children.
THE 40-DAY FEAST
by Wendy Speake
Learn more about Bible
reading as a parent in
Wendy’s book.
Shop.<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca
CREDIT TK
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
43

hf
FAITH & INSPIRATION / EXTENDED FAMILY
to grandparents’
house we go
Each summer, my husband and I take our five
daughters to their grandparents’ house for a
family camp with my two brothers and their five
sons. That’s a total of eight adults and 10 kids.
Writing out a schedule and meal plan ahead of
time ensures that everyone knows what is happening,
how they can contribute and what
activities they hope to enjoy.
We allow for a lot of free play balanced with
scheduled activities. Outdoor play sometimes
involves organized “kid olympics,” sprinkler play
or crafts. Family hikes allow us to spread out
and talk while still being with many different age
groups. And kids’ outdoor campouts in tents provide
quieter game nights for the adults indoors.
This keeps the week of potential chaos, fun.
—Jenny Nanninga
quiet retreats
Visits with extended family can be exhausting
and overwhelming for little ones. So our family
has found a way to create space by incorporating
quiet time every afternoon during visits.
Our family invites our guests to join us for
90 minutes of retreating to different parts of the
house and taking a break for quiet, independent
activity. Tired toddlers, parents and grandparents
take naps. Energetic children sit on their beds
and enjoy coloring, drawing, playing with toys
or quiet screen time. We’ve found that this time
is refreshing for everyone.
—Stacey Pardoe
CREDIT TK LUIZA LAFFITTE
44 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

EXTENDED FAMILY / FAITH & INSPIRATION
hf
flexible fun
My family is intentional about scheduling fun
time during visits with extended family. We set
aside specific blocks of time during the day for
people to do activities they enjoy. For example,
the kids might have a few hours to go to the pool
or playground, while the adults might use that
time for a hike or to relax with a book.
We have found that this approach works well
for visits both at our house and at the homes
of extended family. It allows us to balance the
social aspect of family visits with the need for
personal space.
—Diana Popa
vacation collaboration
Planning a destination vacation with extended
family has made time together so much more
enjoyable. Every few years we all agree on a
location and share the cost of reserving a rental
property to accommodate our large group.
The best locations are close to amenities and
somewhat luxurious. We create a shared document
outlining all of the area’s activities and
costs. Family members sign up for the outings
and pay individually. For those who aren’t
participating, it’s time to relax, take in the
sights and enjoy one another.
—Kelly L. Ward
keep the routine
hospitality campouts
CREDIT TK
OKSIX-ADOBE STOCK
My in-laws live far away. They weren’t used to
entertaining children for long periods of time
when we came for a visit. So we all agreed it was
easier for everyone if we scheduled visits without
my in-laws taking time off from their jobs. While
the grandparents kept their daily work routine,
we played and explored. Then we enjoyed the
evenings together.
—Jennifer Henn
My young kids struggle with offering their bedrooms
to overnight guests. So my husband and
I win them over with the benefits of camping out
on Dad and Mom’s bedroom floor. They bring
along stuffed animals and blankets, and they get
a cozy foam cushion that is only used during
these special “campouts.” Cleaning their rooms
and graciously offering them to guests has
turned into an adventure in hospitality.
—Rachel Matteson
early morning
outings
I have three small children who invariably
wake up before everyone else when we are on
family trips. In anticipation of that, I scout out
nearby playgrounds, parks and coffee shops
ahead of time so I can take them out on those
early mornings. This allows my children to burn
off some of their energy and have fun without
disturbing other adults who want to sleep in.
—Elizabeth James
JUNE / JULY 2023 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
45

KIDS & TEENS / MY THRIVING FAMILY
Outdoor
Fun
Ariyana, 12,
and Elyssa, 15
Our daughters
love to cool off
in the pool.
—Ruth from Michigan
Ezra, 5, and Caleb, 6
Our sons enjoy the water
more with inflatable toys.
—Amanda from Ontario
Timothy, 3
Watering the lawn is
fun playtime for our
little boy.
—Pat and Melisa
from California
Judah, 2
Our little guy is a
happy boy when
making mud pies.
—Sadie from Missouri
Your kids could be in
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family magazine!
Email photos* of your child swimming or enjoying a
favorite barbecued food. (Put “Swimming” or “BBQ” in
the subject line.) Send to: info@fotf.ca
* Largest photo possible.
Professional photos are not accepted.
46 FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA JUNE / JULY 2023

Inves in your child’s faith
Subscribe to a fun magazine!
Refresh your relationship at a <strong>Focus</strong> on Marriage Getaway.
FROM
Spend a weekend in a beautiful setting away from your stressful schedule.
$29.99
Learn new tools from our certified Christian counseling team. Go home with
a stronger bond.
Check out the themes for each
getaway:
▶ Taking Your Marriage to Great
▶ Speaking Ages from the Heart
3-7
▶ Empowered to Love
▶ Intimacy as God Intended
Make learning about the
Lord the highlight of your
child’s day with <strong>Focus</strong> on the
Family Clubhouse Jr. magazine
for young boys and girls! Share
together in page after page of
stories, crafts, puzzles and
games and watch your child
grow in their understanding of
biblical concepts and values.
LEARN MORE
<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.com/Getaway
Ages
8-12
For school-age children,
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family Clubhouse
magazine brings new faithbuilding
articles and activities
in every issue! Girls and boys
love the Bible-based adventure
stories, games and brainteasing
puzzles, plus articles
on kids just like them who are
serving God in inspiring ways!
Teen
girls
<strong>Focus</strong> on the Family's Brio
speaks to a teen girl about all
aspects of her life, helping her
see how to trust the Lord, live
as he would want, and have
fun along the way! Each issue
features articles, biographies,
Bible reading plans, career
profiles, DIY crafts, relationship
advice and more.
Order or renew online at Shop.<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca/Magazines

Shop with confidence
AT FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA
Today there are many ways to shop for
faith‐building resources for your family. And
yet, when you consider purchasing an item,
the same questions resurface:
Is the author offering a biblically based perspective?
Would a counsellor consider it sound advice?
Will the content engage your kids?
When you shop at <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family
Canada, you can be sure about the resources
we’re offering.
We stand behind the items we sell, because
they have been approved by <strong>Focus</strong> on the
Family staff for excellent content that’s in line
with God’s Word.
CREDIT TK
Shop online at Shop.<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.ca or shop by phone at 1.800.661.9800