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pregnancy, birth & babies
For me, learning that my baby was
in breech position (breech being
feet first) was all about acceptance.
Being open to accepting
her the way she was. People told me
about different ways to turn the baby
and also the complications related to
breech birth. I never felt that I wanted to
control my baby because ultimately she
is her own spirit and just wanted to be
born in a different way.
I talked to her every day and asked
her if she was going to put her head
down, but always let her know that I
was open to whatever she wanted to do,
because I felt so strong and confident
that I could have a safe and gentle birth,
regardless of the fears and negativity
associated with breech birth at home.
Breech babies are unique spirits, who
need to be accepted for being different.
Amber, my daughter, had gone
to her 3rd day at school and George,
my partner, suggested that maybe we
should go for a drive with Jarrah out to
the Cascades, to help the baby come. I
felt upset with him for thinking that we
needed to help the baby come. I wanted
Lotus to come when she was ready and
I knew that she would.
We decided to take the back road to
the Cascades and found ourselves really
lost. This was strange, as we had taken
this route hundreds of times; we took
many wrong turns and had to choose
from many different directions.
The drive was quite metaphorical,
reflective of all the decisions we had
made during the pregnancy and the different
directions we would choose from.
We talked along the way home and
reached clarity and understanding in all
our decisions and both felt really good.
After we picked up Amber from
school, we went to visit Morissa so that
Amber, Jazz and Zaria could play. We
talked while the kids played and I was
feeling very high.
I went in to see the kids, as there
had been a disagreement. While I was
explaining the importance of including
Jazzy in the game my waters broke.
There was a huge gush; it was an amazing
feeling. I was in shock and said, ‘Hey
look at this!’
‘What’s happened — has the baby
done a wee?’ the kids asked curiously.
‘No, my waters have broken and that
means the baby is coming!’ I said.
I wanted to be with George, so I
had a cup of tea with Marissa and Lisa
and went home leaving the kids to play
some more.
On the walk home the water just
kept on coming, it was a wonderful
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feeling. The water felt sacred, it was a
beautiful way to begin the process of
birth. When I got home, George asked
me, ‘How long have we got?’ Strange
question, I thought. ‘As long as it takes,’
I replied.
I felt so confident and I wasn’t worried
by anything. I was extremely tired
and hungry, so I listened to my body
and ate tofu roll ups with fresh juice.
Then I went to bed.
I was very excited but knew l needed
to sleep. I was up and down all night with
strong rushes. I had been woken to a huge
gushing of water as I felt my little baby
coming closer to meeting me. At about
5 am I couldn’t sleep any longer. I gave
George a cuddle and suggested we go
for a walk along the beach, then I called
Marissa over to look after my sleeping
children. When we got to the beach the
rushes came on with a greater intensity
It was amazing, I felt
so in control, I knew
what I needed and
my support people
acted on everything
I asked for. They had
as much trust in me
as I did in them.
than I had felt before, one after another,
after another. I didn’t even think that I
was going to make it onto the sand.
I told George that the baby was
going to come fast and that I wanted to
go home. When we arrived home I burst
into tears, overwhelmed by how quickly
it came on; the contractions never lost
their rhythm or momentum from that
time.
George, Brenna and Marissa just kept
those hot towels coming. In between the
rushes, I focused my energy into talking
to the baby, imagining myself opening
up, sending all the energy down into
my uterus.
It was amazing, I felt so in control,
I knew what I needed and my support
people acted on everything I asked for.
They had as much trust in me as I did in
them. I knew that I needed my support
people to keep those hot towels coming,
so I got Marissa to call Kate to look after
the kids. Not long after Kate arrived
Amber and Jarrah woke up.
I will never forget, following a really
strong rush where I could have roared
the loudest ever in my life, Jarrah came
up to me and said, ‘Hey, mum, you
got some scissors?’ ‘Yes, on the fridge,’
replied Robyn.
Both Amber and Jarrah were so comfortable
with what was happening, that
I never felt distressed by their presence
and believed that they knew I was in
control and felt positive about the process.
It was just a delight having the children
in the birth space with me.
I knew Lotus was going to come
soon, so I decided to stand for a few
rushes. I felt too tired to move but I
knew it would help her come. I had
some really good rushes standing and
I felt Lotus come right down. My legs
started to go like jelly and George, who
fully supported my weight, needed a
rest. I went back down on all fours and
talked to my baby. I went into a meditative
state between rushes, being with
my baby.
My support people would give me
drinks and cool my face down, but my
energy was with Lotus, telling her that I
was excited to be meeting her soon and
was ready for her to be born.
After a rest I decided to stand again,
I knew that she would be born if I stood
once more. The kids were sitting on the
lounge very excited because we all knew
she was about to come.
George supported my weight and I
let my body relax, with a strong rush I
gently pushed her to start the flow, then
she guided herself. I breathed deeply
and felt her manoeuvre her little body,
moving her legs and bringing them
down, her body, then her little arms and
finally her head. Everybody was telling
me what was happening, and I was in
awe of the sensation of her birthing herself.
It was beautiful.
Before she landed in the pool, I saw
her little body between my legs, as she
was being caught by Robyn. She was
passed through my legs and I sat down,
her little face looking straight up at me;
her eyes were so curious, she was divine.
Immediately Jarrah and Amber were
standing there next to me, stripping
off and getting into the pool, excited to
meet their sister for the first time. ‘What
is her name?’ Amber asked.
I think her name is Lotus, I questioned
George, being open to what he
felt about her name. ‘Yes, her name is
Lotus,’ George replied.
She named herself during my pregnancy,
so it felt right to name her at
birth.
We spent a long time together in the
pool, just being in the moment, enjoying
this most precious time with our beautiful
little Lotus.