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Many structures seem to be created to
keep mothers isolated (hence the desire
to work even if they don’t have to) and
to keep fathers away and all of us working
harder for less.
Given all this, rather than feel the
apprehension and perhaps anger that
arise when we discover what is required
of us for our children to develop optimally,
many people resort to denigrating
the research. ‘It is too idealistic!’ we
feign, or ‘What about women that must
work because they are poor?’ or ‘What
about women who can’t, for medical
reasons, breastfeed?’ Of course these
situations arise, but does that mean
we must dismiss factual information?
Do we deny that that exercising three
times a week is optimal, because there
are those who are bedridden? Of course
not. Denigrating the research, we unwittingly
dumb down our public officials,
and then use their public statements
— which echo our denigration — to
uphold the lie we hold within. We can
no longer blame them for poor public
policy — they only parrot what they
think we want to hear.
I was recently inspired by a woman
who plans to have her baby born by a
Caesarian-section. She has had birth
complications in the past, so this is
her safest option. However, because
she knows and understands bonding
theory, she is working with her doctor
to ‘deliver’ the baby herself on the
operating table, lifting her child immediately
on to her chest — skin to skin.
She also, for medical reasons, found
she could not breastfeed her first child,
so she instead held him close, skin to
skin, when she bottle-fed him. She is
using her knowledge to empower herself
within a potentially disempowering
situation. We all have situations like
these that pit us against our ability to
choose optimally for ourselves and for
our children. The key is in not resign-
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ing into guilt, but doing what we can,
armed with good research.
We may contribute to our evolutionary
stagnation if we disregard the powerful
body of research that reveals to us
the vital keys towards creating a more
peaceful society, at a time when humanity
must invent radically new strategies
for survival. The only way to release
love from perpetual political suspension
and free up intelligent debate so as
to foster creative change, is for ordinary
people like ourselves to take the power
back into our own hands by becoming
informed and putting aside our agenda
of protecting ourselves against the discomfort
such research brings. We must
bear the discomfort and disappointment
that can ensue because we live
in a society that doesn’t facilitate our
ability to parent optimally. Rather than
withdraw into guilt we must use the
power of that discomfort to propel us
into social and political action and insist
that our public officials help us create a
truly family-friendly society.
Editor’s note: Readers will have noticed that our
cover price has increased to $8.95. To have continued
at the previous price was unsustainable.
We operate under strict, self-imposed advertiser
standards: We do not accept advertising from
companies whose products or services are not in
alignment with the byronchild mission. This of
course limits our revenue sources but is essential
if we are to maintain our integrity as a non corporate-driven
publication. We wish to provide a
magazine that is free of the usual propaganda and
advertiser driven content generally associated
with child or parenting magazines. Our subscription
price however, will remain the same, giving
subscribers an increased and attractive discount.
We hope you will continue to find yourself supported
and stimulated by byronchild.
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