A Leader's Guide to Trauma in the Unit - US Army War College

Army War College Spouses’ Project
SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES
DEATH, ILLNESS, INJURY OF A LEADER
“You make a living by what you get. You make a life by what you give.”
--Winston Churchill
Emotions run high in a unit when a leader is killed. Somehow no one expects the leader
to be vulnerable. Since the leader’s spouse is usually the one helping others, it is often
hard for the unit to know how to help him/her. It can also be hard for the leader’s spouse
to accept help from the unit. Being aware of the uniqueness of this situation can help.
PRACTICAL IDEAS
• Make sure that the S1 or Rear Detachment has, at all times, a complete and updated
roster of the unit.
• As with all grieving spouses, a leader’s spouse will often act out of character.
Everyone should be aware of this and not take anything personally. It is important
that you do not put your own expectations on how a person is grieving.
• When a leader dies, often groups outside the unit help (sister battalions, the
Brigade and the Division). Whichever group the spouse is most comfortable with
should take the lead in support. Again, do not take this personally. Keep in mind
what is best for the spouse.
• It is helpful if the Executive Officer’s (XO) spouse, or if unable the S3’s spouse,
coordinates the unit’s efforts of support.
• Someone will be appointed as acting Commander. Usually at a later date there
will be a change of command. This can be a very difficult time for the leader’s
spouse.
• The unit may have difficulty accepting the new leader and his spouse. Though this
is normal, other leaders in the unit should be sensitive to this and try to set the
example. It may be helpful to have a social function for the unit as soon as
possible after the change of command.
• In the case of injury or illness, a leader may or may not be returned to duty. The
leader may even be medically discharged.
When a leader dies, suddenly the unit has lost its leadership on both the active duty and
family side of the battalion. Though all soldiers are equally important, the death of a
leader creates a significant change to the unit. Being aware of this can help the unit cope
with these changes.
(For additional ideas see Support section. For additional ideas on illness and injury see
Illness/Injury section.)
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A Leader’s Guide to Trauma in the Unit April 2004