Issue 22 - 1992

Coe Review • Issue 22
looked at the floor. “I have wanted to die so many times before. I
wanted to leave this life because I felt below life, below death.”
“Think back to the pain old man,” the cigar tip glowed
through the thickening smoke. “Death was what you wanted then.
death was the only answer, remember? Death was the only thing that
made sense.” The old man did remember. He remembered each face
that had died in his hands; he remembered every face. The thought
was always the same when he could feel no pulse - lucky. Lucky
because those faces never again had to witness the horrors that only
exist in war, nor would they ever have to live with the memories of
those horrors, the horrors they committed.
“I remember,” the old man’s voice was a whisper of a
whisper. “I am ready. You are right, I want to die.”
There was a knock at the door. “Helllooo, are you home? It’s
me, Shelley.” Shelley’s voice was playful and full of life. “Are you
sleeping in there?” Death looked to the door and then to the old man
and then back to the door. His permanent grin seemed to grow. “So
now you want to die?” Death released the old man’s hand and put the
cigar out in the ashtray next to the cigar box. He stood and walked
to the coat rack where he picked up his cloak. “Do you really want
to die old man?” Death asked mockingly, pulling his hood over his
skull.
“Yes, I... where are you going? Wait I... “the old man’s hand
was still poised in the air where Death had left it. “I want to die, I
want to die!”
“No, you will have to wait your turn.”
“But you said... “The old man protested from his knees.
“I said nothing.”
Shelley could be heard unlocking the door with her set of
keys as the old man closed his eyes and clenched his fists in
frustration.
“If you’re not taking me then why’d you co--,” it hit him like
a diamond bullet in the forehead. Shelley thrust open the door.
“SHELLEY RUN! The old man’s heart beat in his ears as he
dropped to all fours. “RUN Shelley. Get away from here!” He
yelled, snapping his head up like a wolf howling at the moon.
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