Surah 1-2 - YasSarNal QuR'aN

Al-Baqarah (The Cow) | THE FAMILY: THE FOUNDATION OF HUMAN SOCIETYThe waiting period also acts as a period of grace during which the estrangedcouple can test their feelings and emotions. They may still have feelings for eachother, and their mutual compassion might have been overshadowed by a temporarymoment of heated emotions, or a misunderstanding, or personal pride. Once tempersare cooled and fury gives way to common sense, the couple might reconsider theirsituation and decide that it would be more sensible to forget their disagreement andresume their life together.Divorce is the least preferable solution in God’s eyes; it should only be used as alast resort, when all else has failed. Elsewhere, the Qur’ān urges that divorce must bepreceded by attempts at reconciliation and that it must not take place during themenstrual period. It is only possible in a period of cleanliness from menstruationduring which no sexual intercourse has taken place between the divorcing couples.This gives yet more time for reflection and reconsideration.When a first divorce between a married couple is initiated, the waiting period actsas a test for their feelings, and if they discover during this time that reconciliation ispossible, that option is available to them. As the sūrah says: “their husbands are entitledto take them back, if they desire reconciliation.” (Verse 228) The condition here is that, incoming back together again, the couple should be seriously seeking reconciliation.The aim should never be to undermine the wife’s right to marry someone else or putany pressure on her to resume an unhappy relationship.“Women shall, in all fairness, enjoy rights similar to those exercised against them...“(Verse 228) The divorced woman is required to wait for a certain period before shecan marry someone else, and is obliged to declare whether she is carrying a baby byher divorced husband. The husband is equally required to show good faith if hewishes to take her back, making sure that he intends to cause her no harm. He isfurther obliged, as we shall see later, to provide maintenance for his divorced wifeduring the waiting period.The sūrah goes on to say: “... although men have an advantage over them.” (Verse 228)This advantage, in my view, is in no way absolute but is contingent, within thepresent context, upon the fact that it is the man who initiates the divorce and would,therefore, have the prerogative to take his wife back, a decision that could not be leftto her to take. This advantage, indeed a useful and proper one, is by no meansuniversal, as some have erroneously concluded, but is simply dictated by the natureand the circumstances of the dispute.The verse then concludes by asserting: “God is Almighty, Wise.” He lays down ruleswith force and authority, as well as prudence and compassion.Fair and Balanced Divorce Systems303