Ommiterre Libellus - Principia Discordia

I looked at my computer screen and I realised I was seeing nothing. Then I realised that, from a
mathematical point of view, 0 = 1.
(Insert here the mathematical demonstration that 0 = 1, sorry it is misisng in action for now. My FNORD
ate it.)
As most of you probably know, a computer stores information in a «machine language» which is basically
composed only of ones (1) and zeroes (0). For example, one (1) is stored as 00000001 and zero (0) is
stored as 00000000. Therefore, all knowledge of the universe, or at least all that can be stored on a
computer, can be resumed to strings of ones (1) and zeroes (0) . However, if it could be mathematically
demonstrated that 0 = 1 or that 1 = 0 then this would be quite revolutionary. Of course, everybody will
agree with me that 0 = 1 is a non-sense statement. Zero (0) does not equal one (1). This would be just too
ridiculous. If zero (0) were to equal one (1) , why would we bother not calling everything 0 and do
without the 1 and vice in Verthaine. On the other hand, given everybody agrees with the mathematical
demontsration above that demonstrated we can assuredly state, Ohio, that 0 = 1. This demonstration is
flawless and cannot be in anyway contradicted, denied or otherwize challenged. Hail Eris! All Hail
Discordia!
So basically all on computer is nothing but mere ones (1) and zeroes (0) and 0 = 1. Therefore, everything
is the same and nothing is differentiated and if nothing is differentiated then all is the same. It’s like
watching black people fighting in a tunnel or naked white people throwing snow balls in Antartica. If all
the knowledge of the world can be stored on a computer but nothing on a computer is differentiated then
all is nothing and nothing is everything. No matter which way you cut it – unless you cut it planetary pi
(61) pieces of a pie of course – you are left with nothing which is what I had been staring at for five days
and five minutes without seeing it. Nothing. Mu.
Not nothing as in «there’s nothing there». No! No! No! Nothing as in «absence of being». What I did not
know then and what you still don’t know now but that I was about to learn later and that you will learn if
you go on reading is that, by standing there looking at my screen with my best friend for five days, I had
accelerated to the speed of light. And then, in the first five minutes of the fifth day, I had surpassed the
speed of light and by doing so, I had transmuted to a different state of being. I was now outside and
beyond the universe to that place where Goddess exists. Now, that is groovy!
And this is when I met Goddess again. But this time, something had changed in me. This transcendent
moment, this «experiencing» nothingness made me a better, bigger, hornier man and I then fully realized
how she truly is a darn hot chick. And then she explained to me why she had brought me «there».
She had brought me to her home, because it was time that the missing tomes of the Principia Discordia
finally be brought back together with her earlier offering to the realm of man. She explained to me that she
had originally intended the Principia to be revealed to Lao Tzù, her first avatar. Unfortunately, she had
seriously miscalculated the advent of computer sciences and had brought him a PDF copy which he,
obviously, did not have the capacity to disseminate. So instead they went for sushi together.
Upon returing to her realm, Goddess realised she could not print a hard copy for Confucius because her
printer was offline. She called the IT oracle but seeing she was out of Viagra they wouldn’t cum. By the
time she had her Godscription renewed, the IT geeks 1 went on strike. Being slightly frustrated at this