Rude Awakenings - Forest Sangha Publications

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^0 L E AV I N G H O M E 06mother: she was probably married off when she was young for dynasticreasons, then became pregnant and gave birth in a forest. The legendsweave poetic fancies around it, but it must have been tough—at any rate,she died a week later. Then my thoughts wandered to my own mother,who was quite frail and poorly when I left Britain: did she know what shewas letting herself in for when she had me? It was still difficult for her toacknowledge that I was a Buddhist monk—a bit like one of the familygoing nuts or becoming a junkie. And what good could what I was doingwith my life do for her? Things weren’t clicking.Meanwhile, modern Nepal was too involved with getting on its feetto be supporting inner tranquillity. Money needs to be made, and thatmeans servicing tour parties. Business was hardly booming in the snackbar by the lodging where the afternoon’s heat confined me, but theradios certainly were. I tried a couple of times to get whoever was lodgingin the room beneath us to turn the racket down so that I could sitpeacefully in my room in the hot afternoon. Inner mutterings about“this being a holy place” and “why don’t people meditate” and “seriouspilgrims (like me)” got me pacing up and down the room. Then Istopped and sat down with my squalling and took it into my heart.“When you go to practise in the place of the Buddha, you must notfind fault with anyone; if you find fault, it is because you have notmade peace with the world. If you have not made peace with theworld, it is because you have not made peace in your heart.” MasterHua, a Chinese Buddhist master who was visiting Amaravati a monthbefore the pilgrimage began, had come out with that comment whenaddressing the assembled <strong>Sangha</strong>. It appeared as a general exhortationdirected to nobody in particular, but it stuck in my mind like an arrowin a target, and now the recognition shivered in my mind. And as theradio jangled and blared and the wave of irritation collapsed, I rememberedBernie.Twenty years ago, Bernie in the room next to mine at Warwick Universitywas devotedly applying himself to his study of economics, while5 1
^0 F I R S T M O O N 06I was heavily committed to loud music. Pounding on the wall—did I letup?Noway!Pleasandthreatswouldbringaboutamomentaryrespite,butnot for long. I loved music—I knew that it was bothering him, but so what?Now was the time to listen and ask for forgiveness. To hold Bernie inmy mind and empathise with him for a while was a lot more useful thangetting irritated that not everybody around was meeting my specialrequirements. I interfered with Bernie’s dharma; now on pilgrimage itwas proper to make my dharma one of noncontention. That fitted. Sothere was a birth of sorts at Lumbini, not the inspirational mode thatlegends are made of, but something earthier. It struck me that whereverwe went on the pilgrimage, the life of this journey was not going to bein the ruins and the temples, it was going to be conceived and nurturedwherever my mind flailed or fumed.However, in the manifest world, there was the matter of going placesto be carried out. So after three nights at the birthplace we set off. Weleft at dawn, walked north along the canal and came to the dirt roadgoing west. About twenty-five kilometres along that road was Tilaurakot,which the Nepalese hold to be the ruins of Kapilavatthu,renowned as the city where Queen Maya’s son grew to manhood.I wanted to dedicate this time to my father, reciting a mantra and recollectingthis bittersweet family business as I walked. But just as the recollectionsfocused so that I could open the old buried feelings,something would pull me out over and over: a bus careening around thepotholes and showering us with dust as we stepped back; then a joltingbullock cart with the driver clucking and whooping at his beasts; sometimesit was Nick drawing my attention to an aspect of the landscape.Having had a lovely time at Lumbini watching the birds, he couldn’t helpbut explode with glee at some bird perching on a telephone line. “Look,Bhante, a red-vented bulbul!” “Uh-huh.” I had a sinking realisation whatthis trip was going to be all about: leave it all behind, all the positions,the expectations, and the choices—these six months would be a crashcourse in keeping the focus very open.5 2
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RUDE AWAKENINGS
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The mindful exert themselves;they a
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^0 F O R E W O R D 06mystically emb
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PrefaceWhat follows is the narrativ
Page 18: The First MoonT H E M I D D L E L A
Page 21 and 22: ^0 F I R S T M O O N 06chomping.
Page 23 and 24: ^0 F I R S T M O O N 06deities with
Page 26 and 27: ^0 P I L G R I M S 06things around
Page 31 and 32: ^0 F I R S T M O O N 06and pedestri
Page 33 and 34: ^0 F I R S T M O O N 06government w
Page 35 and 36: ^0 F I R S T M O O N 06too attracti
Page 37 and 38: A J A H N S U C I T T O^0 F I R S T
Page 40 and 41: 2Over the BorderA J A H N S U C I T
Page 42 and 43: ^0 B O R D E R 06managed to ignore
Page 44 and 45: ^0 B O R D E R 06Buddhist holy plac
Page 46 and 47: ^0 B O R D E R 06a Buddha except th
Page 48 and 49: ^0 B O R D E R 06the maelstrom, som
Page 50 and 51: ^0 B O R D E R 06I read a sign in t
Page 52 and 53: ^0 B O R D E R 06to Bhairawa, the n
Page 54 and 55: ^0 B O R D E R 06of homage to the B
Page 56 and 57: ^0 B O R D E R 06the grass bank fac
Page 58 and 59: 3Leaving HomeA J A H N S U C I T T
Page 60 and 61: ^0 L E AV I N G H O M E 06ascertain
Page 62 and 63: ^0 L E AV I N G H O M E 06take arou
Page 64 and 65: ^0 L E AV I N G H O M E 06region an
Page 66 and 67: ^0 L E AV I N G H O M E 06wanted us
Page 70 and 71: ^0 L E AV I N G H O M E 06We stoppe
Page 72 and 73: ^0 L E AV I N G H O M E 06to allow
Page 74 and 75: ^0 L E AV I N G H O M E 06conversat
Page 76 and 77: The Second MoonL U M B I N I T O VA
Page 78 and 79: 4The ObserverA J A H N S U C I T T
Page 80 and 81: ^0 O B S E RV E R 06with a lot of t
Page 82 and 83: ^0 O B S E RV E R 06contemplative b
Page 84 and 85: ^0 O B S E RV E R 06After that we e
Page 86 and 87: ^0 O B S E RV E R 06forbidden. Reli
Page 88 and 89: ^0 O B S E RV E R 06told me about t
Page 90 and 91: ^0 O B S E RV E R 06to sit beside t
Page 92 and 93: ^0 O B S E RV E R 06With this move
Page 94: ^0 O B S E RV E R 06the back; the d
Page 97 and 98: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06live in th
Page 99 and 100: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06Eventually
Page 101 and 102: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06to a prese
Page 103 and 104: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06of his kne
Page 105 and 106: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06found so d
Page 107 and 108: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06of them sp
Page 109 and 110: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06stupa, try
Page 111 and 112: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06wanted to
Page 113 and 114: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06and a dark
Page 115 and 116: ^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06from the e
Page 117 and 118: River Gandak, Part 2
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^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06ebbing out
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^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06violent at
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^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06That topic
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^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06friendly f
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^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06The boat w
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^0 S E C O N D M O O N 06was time t
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7The Kingdom of the LawA J A H N S
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^0 T H E L AW 06A sub-lieutenant in
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^0 T H E L AW 06was built in the gr
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^0 T H E L AW 06to get over the wor
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^0 T H E L AW 06accept any fare at
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^0 T H E L AW 06and milk sweets I b
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^0 T H E L AW 06the surrounding tre
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^0 T H E L AW 06a small house near
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8CyclesA J A H N S U C I T T ONovem
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^0 C Y C L E S 06long while for the
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^0 C Y C L E S 06thosebirthsanddeat
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^0 C Y C L E S 06There was a tea st
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^0 C Y C L E S 06The land we were p
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^0 C Y C L E S 06the Indian “West
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^0 C Y C L E S 06parothas straight
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^0 C Y C L E S 06ignore thirty boys
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A J A H N S U C I T T O^0 C Y C L E
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9The Deathless DrumA J A H N S U C
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^0 T H E D R U M 06Once...when I wa
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^0 T H E D R U M 06was a way of enh
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^0 T H E D R U M 06Sangha at Amarav
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^0 T H E D R U M 06scriptures descr
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^0 T H E D R U M 06job, but had eno
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^0 T H E D R U M 06Vaishali’s gre
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^0 T H E D R U M 06less.” And the
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^0 T H E D R U M 06had been a notic
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^0 T H E D R U M 06Striding across
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Mid-Bihar
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06is losing it
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06I had learne
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06cycle—a va
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06the way acro
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06in Bettiah.
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06newspaper th
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06There is not
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06that India h
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A J A H N S U C I T T O^0 T H I R D
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06bigoted mons
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11Dark AngelA J A H N S U C I T T O
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06on. Then for
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06directly in h
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06something cos
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06a cycle ricks
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06is generously
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06body in order
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06majority of t
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06there are man
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06wound about w
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06It happens to
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06there. After
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^0 DA R K A N G E L 06I contemplate
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12Letting GoA J A H N S U C I T T O
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06enough for A
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06marketplace.
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06to be comple
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06there with n
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06main road, t
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06blue antelop
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06formlessness
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06even, about
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06been a stray
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06cool—I sta
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^0 L E T T I N G G O 06them, but my
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13Landing PlaceA J A H N S U C I T
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^0 L A N D I N G 06gone. And the di
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^0 L A N D I N G 06more assertive.
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^0 L A N D I N G 06manager facing e
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^0 L A N D I N G 06I was left alone
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A J A H N S U C I T T O^0 L A N D I
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^0 L A N D I N G 06Ajahn Sucitto in
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^0 L A N D I N G 06Ahlee, and the m
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^0 L A N D I N G 06moment we were b
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^0 L A N D I N G 06much either. I f
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06admit that a
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06regretfully
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06a ministerin
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06to think of
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06filter like
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06More than an
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06Gotama milk-
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06the sun, alw
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A J A H N S U C I T T O^0 T H I R D
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06many-headed
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^0 T H I R D M O O N 06abandoned Ed
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EpilogueSo many people helped us bo
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NotesP R E FA C E“The mindful exe
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^0 N O T E S 06C H A P T E R 6 : S
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^0 N O T E S 06C H A P T E R 1 0 :
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GlossaryAbhidhamma (Pali) one of th
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^0 G L O S S A RY 06chillum (Hindi)
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^0 G L O S S A RY 06Mahayana (Sansk
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^0 G L O S S A RY 06sabong (Hindi)
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Vinaya (Pali) the monastic discipli
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^0 B I B L I O G R A P H Y 06Conze,
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^0 B I B L I O G R A P H Y 06Raven-
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Recommended ReadingB U D D H I S T
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IndexAAbhidhamma, 213, 284, 295Adi
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^0 I N D E X 06HHajipur, 171-73, 18
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^0 I N D E X 06Nalanda and, 210-11,
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