Lord, please help me to change - Judith Couchman

A TRU E VIE W O F YO UBased o n firs t impressions , th e abandonment s didn' tappear t o mangle Beryl' s life . She gained internationa l fam e a sthe firs t person t o fl y solo across th e Atlanti c Ocea n fro m Eng -land t o North America , agains t th e headwinds . Befor e this , sh ehad becom e Africa' s first femal e thoroughbred traine r an d it sfirst woman bus h pilot . She also published a best-selling book an dnumerous short stories about he r adventures .Personally, though , th e desertion s traile d Bery l fo r a life -time. Sh e neve r reall y like d women an d seldo m truste d men . Sh ebecame notoriousl y promiscuou s an d harbore d n o conscienc eabout ho w sh e spen t mone y o r i f she pai d mountin g bills . I tseemed tha t whe n Beryl' s parents left , she abandoned he r con -science and queste d fo r attention. 1 6One ca n gues s tha t Bery l didn't chang e he r destructiv ehabits sinc e sh e neve r pause d lon g enough t o reckon wit h th echildhood tha t shape d he r womanhood. I n he r late r years , whe nthe fame had passed , she hated livin g alone with herself .uch o f the goal t o change personall y centers on a strug -gle t o liv e at peace wit h ourselves . I f we stop th e activit yand si t quietly wit h ourselves , w e would lik e t o feel a t eas e wit hour ow n company .Yet for many o f us, that's when th e agon y begins . Wit h tim eto think, w e recount ou r sin s and imperfections , fearing they ma ybe discovered, or w e worry about ho w they'v e alread y indicted us .It's much easie r t o keep bus y and drow n ou t th e inne r voic e tha tnags us .Strangely, it' s this same voic e o f conscience tha t ca n lea d u sto peace—if we'll pause lon g enough t o answer the questions an devaluate who we are and wher e we'v e been. I t begins with review -ing our persona l histor y and particularl y th e growing-tip years .With th e expert s an d literatur e availabl e today , mos t o f u sagree tha t childhoo d influence s play a powerful role i n shapin gus. I t take s considerable coaxing , though , t o convince u s to facethe gir l we've left behind. I t can b e too revealing and painful .Who wa s she bac k then ? Ho w di d lif e affect her? Th eanswers t o thes e and othe r question s poin t t o the habit s and atti -tudes w e figh t today . Understandin g ho w ou r problem sdeveloped ca n hel p u s to overcome the m i f we dare t o act on th einsights we gain.55