Always Only You by Chloe Liese (z-lib.org).epub

I’m left hanging, the future of my love life discarded to place a lunch order.
It’s not entirely surprising. Food is serious business to Frankie. Turning, she tells
him what she wants, snaps her menu shut, and sets it in his arms. I order, too,
and we both watch him until he’s gone, leaving us alone in our secluded corner
of the restaurant.
“You were saying?” I offer. Trying desperately not to sound…well,
desperate.
“Right. I have some questions and concerns. First, what do you want from
someone when it comes to having feelings for them?”
“Well, I’m not talking about someone, Frankie. I’m talking about you.”
She bites her lip. “Yes. That.”
“That?”
“Just—” She waves her hand impatiently. “Talk. Elaborate.”
“Well, if you felt how I felt, I’d want to date. We could keep it between us
until you were comfortable telling other people, given work.”
She nods thoughtfully, her fingers tangling in her necklace. “Ren, I’m
attracted to you. I care about you, respect the hell out of you—” Frankie narrows
her eyes. “What are you grinning about?”
Hearing her say it, I’m euphoric. I feel how absurdly wide my smile is, so I
set a hand over it, and shrug.
“But, here’s the deal. I haven’t wanted a relationship in years.”
“Years?”
“Stop repeating me. Yes, years. I’ve avoided it like the plague.”
“Why?” I ask.
She puffs air out of her cheeks and drums her fingers on the table.
“Historically, in relationships, people’s patience wears thin with me and
my circumstances. I’ve noticed I’m happier, that my self-esteem and well-being
are better, when I’m alone. So, I’ve sort of released the idea of being a whitepicket-fence
and two-point-five-kids person.”
“Well, that’s fine. I want my house on the beach, which you like; a dog,
which you have; and five kids which—”
“Five?” Frankie’s eyes widen comically. “Jesus, Bergman. My yaya hurts
just thinking about it.”
“Your yaya?”
“I told you, stop repeating me.” Shutting her eyes, she breathes deeply and
says on her exhale, “I got sidetracked.”
“That’s my fault.” When she opens her eyes, I try to meet them. “Can I ask
you something?”
She nods.