6 An Ode to Baby Boomers By: Dianne Hahn / Back in the Days Ah, the Baby Boomer generation. An era of peace signs, bell bottoms, colorful polyester outfits, disco fever, and Lava Lamps We were raised without the internet, but you didn’t miss what you didn’t know. Remember these quirky things? No smart phones with voice assistance in sight, we had to deal with rotary phones. And don’t be in a hurry… it took a minute to dial the corrects digits with your index finger, then curse under your breath when the rotary dial got stuck at number 9. Let’s not forget the tangled cords we had to contend with, either! Our minds were blown when color TV first made its appearance. Suddenly, the world was filled with rainbows, and our favorite characters on screen looked totally different in color! However, we were still adjusting those rabbit ear antennae to catch the best reception, and it was like trying to find a needle in a haystack. “Just a little to the left…no, wait, go back… oh you had it there! Okay, freeze!” Who could forget vinyl records? The struggle was real: dusting them off, carefully placing the needle without scratching the surface, and trying to avoid the wrath of our parents when we accidentally scratched their precious collection. But hey, we had some memorable tunes like “Staying Alive” and “Bohemian Rhapsody” that would get anyone grooving - even those with two left feet! So cool! As teenagers, our social life revolved around good old-fashioned face-to-face interactions. No swiping left or right. We actually had to approach someone and start a conversation. It was exciting, small talk with sweaty palms and no emojis to hide behind! We still prefer to talk more than text. Remember the fashion trends? Lots of flair pants, platform shoes, and hairstyles that defy the laws of gravity. We owned it with style! Or we thought we did! Growing up a Baby Boomer, we navigated through life with determination and an upbeat attitude. So, to all my fellow Baby Boomers out there, let’s raise a toast to our colorful past and embrace the ever-changing present. Peace and love, my friends! A former schoolteacher, Dianne Sebis Hahn writes for children too. Presently, Dianne has eight books available on Amazon.com. September 20<strong>23</strong> You Gotta Laugh By: Bill Caserta / Bill’s Blurbs “Baker’s Dozen” Commandments for Seniors A 1. It’s okay to talk to yourself. There are times when you need expert advice. 2. “In Style” are any clothes that still fit you. 3. You don’t need “anger management.” You need people to stop pissing you off. 4. Your people skills are just fine. It’s your tolerance for idiots that needs work. 5. The biggest lie you tell yourself: “I don’t need to write that down. I’ll remember it.” 6. “On time” is when you get there. 7. Even duct tape can’t fix stupid, but it sure does muffle the sound. 8. It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes, then come out wrinkle free and 3 sizes smaller. 9. Lately you’ve noticed people your age are so much older than you. 10. Growing old should have taken longer. 11. Aging might have slowed you down, but it hasn’t shut you up. 12. “One for the road” means peeing before you leave the house. And bonus commandment: You still have not learned to act your age…and hope you never will. *Are You Ready For Some Football? In honor of Publisher Dan’s long time devotion to his New York Giants (but for other football fans, just fill in your favorite team) I ask you to consider the following: Q: What do the NY Giants and possums have in common? A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road! Q: What did the NY Giants and the late Billy Graham have in common? A: They both can make 60,000 people stand up and yell “Jesus Christ!” Q: What is the difference between a NY Giants’ fan (like Dan) and a baby? A: The baby will stop whining after a while. And my favorite: All of the Seven Dwarfs were marching through the forest one day when they fell in a deep, dark ravine. Snow White, who was following behind, peered over the edge of the steep chasm and called out to her fallen comrades. From the depths of the dark hole a voice returned, “The New York Giants are Super Bowl contenders.” Snow White thought to herself, “Thank God! At least Dopey survived!”
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