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Uncle Andy's Digest - September 2023

Fall is on the approach! While you're waiting for the foliage to come in, you can enjoy the September 2023 edition of Uncle Andy's Digest. As always, you'll find Great stories, Funny Jokes, Punny Fun, hilarious one-liners, and Fun at our out-and-abouts. Shop local, and find the best central Maine businesses to serve your needs and wants.

Fall is on the approach! While you're waiting for the foliage to come in, you can enjoy the September 2023 edition of Uncle Andy's Digest. As always, you'll find Great stories, Funny Jokes, Punny Fun, hilarious one-liners, and Fun at our out-and-abouts. Shop local, and find the best central Maine businesses to serve your needs and wants.

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UNCLE<br />

DIGEST<br />

ANDY’S<br />

Your local guide to... well, just about anything!<br />

SEPTEMBER<br />

<strong>2023</strong><br />

SINCE 1996<br />

GET REAL. GET HYUNDAI.<br />

Sales • Lease • Rentals • Parts & Service<br />

CHECK OUT OUR LARGE<br />

INVENTORY!<br />

Call Ryan Kennard<br />

207-346-0279<br />

Whited Equipment Co. is your New Factory Authorized Hyundai<br />

Construction Equipment Dealer for Central & Southern Maine.<br />

New & used available!<br />

whitedhyundai.com • (855) 882-4010 • Come see us at 2160 Hotel Road, Auburn<br />

207-782-7113<br />

Get Your FREE<br />

Quote Today!<br />

25 Lisbon St.<br />

Lewiston<br />

207.740.9053<br />

207THC.com<br />

31 Blake Street, Lewiston • armandsautobody.com<br />

Ask About Our Free Med Cards<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 1


I can’t exercise for long periods. When I get back from a run, my girlfriend usually asks if I’ve forgotten something.<br />

I used to be addicted to swimming but I’m very proud to say I’ve been dry for six years.


I don’t think women should be allowed to have kids after 40.<br />

40 kids is way too much by any standard.<br />

MODERN WOODMEN<br />

OF AMERICA<br />

SEPTEMBER <strong>2023</strong><br />

ACTIVITIES<br />

Tuesday, Sept.12th<br />

Sam’s Marketplace Mall<br />

12:00-7:00pm<br />

675 Main Street Lewiston,<br />

Members: $5.00<br />

Guests: $6.00<br />

Purchase Tickets: 9-06-<strong>2023</strong><br />

(8:30-1:00pm)<br />

Wednesday, Sept. 13th<br />

Dairy Joy<br />

3:00-7:00pm<br />

Auburn or Lewiston Location<br />

Members: $2.00<br />

Guests: $2.50<br />

Purchase Tickets: 9-06-<strong>2023</strong><br />

(8:30am-1:00pm)<br />

Tuesday, Sept.19th<br />

Roy’s Breakfast<br />

7:00-10:00am<br />

Members: $5.00<br />

Guests: $6.00<br />

Purchase Tickets: 9-06-<strong>2023</strong><br />

(8:30am-1:00pm)<br />

Thursday, Sept. 21st<br />

KP’s Place<br />

245 Center Street Auburn,<br />

Members: $7.50<br />

Guests: $9.00<br />

Purchase Tickets: 9-06-<strong>2023</strong><br />

(8:30am-1:00pm)<br />

Reminder: Please do not call<br />

the restaurants. If you have a<br />

question, please call the office at<br />

207-782-1833 or 207-333-6052<br />

and speak with Jamie. Tickets<br />

must be purchased at the MWA<br />

District Office at 184 Webster<br />

Street Lewiston on the dates/<br />

times listed for each activity.<br />

Menus are subject to change.<br />

No substitutions or add-ons.<br />

Most importantly -<br />

Have Fun!<br />

TELL THEM YOU SAW<br />

THEIR AD IN THE<br />

DIGEST!<br />

Money can’t buy you happiness? Well, check this out, I bought myself a Happy Meal.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 3


<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

is published by the first Friday<br />

of every month by Maine<br />

Mountain Ocean Group, Inc.<br />

with its world headquarters<br />

located at 9 Grove Street,<br />

Auburn, Maine, USA.<br />

Published and distributed<br />

since 1996 throughout<br />

Central Maine and mailed to<br />

subscribers all over the Free<br />

World. Subscriptions are<br />

$49 .95 /year.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com<br />

Office: 207-783-7039<br />

Our Team<br />

SUE<br />

MARSTON<br />

CEO<br />

PAM<br />

ASHBY<br />

PUBLISHER<br />

STEVE<br />

SIMARD<br />

SALES<br />

My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the local zoo.<br />

Like our<br />

name implies,<br />

we’ll help you<br />

SMILE<br />

AGAIN!<br />

Smile Again<br />

Dentures<br />

• Full Dentures<br />

• Immediate Dentures<br />

• Partial Dentures<br />

• Rebases<br />

• Relines<br />

• Repairs<br />

All work done on-site.<br />

Repairs usually<br />

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STEPHANIE<br />

ARSENAULT<br />

OFFICE<br />

MANAGER<br />

TOM HILL<br />

IT • WEB •<br />

SOCIAL MEDIA<br />

AMY<br />

ST.HILAIRE<br />

SALES<br />

TIM<br />

ELWELL<br />

GRAPHIC<br />

DESIGNER<br />

While <strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

tries very hard to ensure the<br />

accuracy of the information in our<br />

clients’ advertisements and our<br />

publication in general, we are not<br />

responsible for vendor availability,<br />

typographical errors, technical<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> inaccuracies, Andy’s product <strong>Digest</strong> pricing<br />

errors, or omissions.<br />

4 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

Mike & Joe<br />

Adkins<br />

Licensed<br />

Denturists<br />

801 Webster Street, Lewiston<br />

smileagaindentures@gmail.com<br />

SmileAgainDentures.com<br />

514-0660<br />

Does your horse smoke? [No.] Well, then I think your stable is burning.


MAINE’S #1 STEAKHOUSE<br />

Shown here:<br />

Coconut Shrimp & Bull Chips Appetizers<br />

Thank<br />

you for another<br />

great Summer Block<br />

Party benefiting Make-<br />

A-Wish Maine.<br />

Our gratitude<br />

goes out to all in the<br />

community who were so<br />

generous with volunteering,<br />

donations, and sponsorships<br />

for this huge event!<br />

<strong>2023</strong><br />

Thank you to all sponsors, volunteers<br />

& contributors for helping make the<br />

Grand Finale Block Party<br />

a great success!<br />

Thank you Lewiston/Auburn &<br />

surrounding communities -<br />

Jimbo would be proud!<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com<br />

1052 Minot Avenue, Auburn • 783-6885 • MacsGrill.com<br />

5


A lot of people cry when they cut onions. The trick is not to form an emotional bond.<br />

Call us for a quote<br />

TODAY!<br />

It’s why I’m here.<br />

Some things we all have in common.<br />

There’s nobody like me to protect the things<br />

we all value.<br />

Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.®<br />

CALL ME TODAY.<br />

I’m a proud sponsor of the Summer Block Party<br />

HATS<br />

MUGS<br />

EMBROIDERY<br />

SCREENPRINTING<br />

NOW OFFERING<br />

ONLINE STORES<br />

See us for<br />

your fall sports<br />

and fan wear<br />

205 Washington St.<br />

South, Auburn<br />

207-784-4184<br />

coastaltshirts.com<br />

PENS<br />

BAGS<br />

Why are eggs not very much into jokes?<br />

Because they could crack up.<br />

coastaltshirts.com<br />

Lessons<br />

Submitted by Thomas Hill<br />

A woman stood inside the<br />

front door, her arms full of<br />

coats. Four small children<br />

scurried around her.<br />

Her husband, coming<br />

down the stairs, asked<br />

why she was standing<br />

there.<br />

“Here,” she said, handing<br />

him the coats, “This time<br />

you put the children into<br />

their coats, and I’ll go<br />

honk the horn.”<br />

Now bidding commercial<br />

plow accounts<br />

207.754.2343 <br />

hirdcontracting@gmail.com<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

6 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

Do I lose when the police officer says papers and I say scissors?


My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are. But I laugh more.<br />

Have Buyers,<br />

Need Listings<br />

368 Minot Avenue, Auburn<br />

207.333.6001 • mainesourcehomes.com<br />

Out and About at<br />

Fore a Cause Golf<br />

Tournament<br />

Summit Springs<br />

Golf Course<br />

& Mary's Irish Pub<br />

FALL in love with<br />

your next home!<br />

Ryan O’Leary<br />

Jon<br />

Mercier<br />

Mark<br />

Turner<br />

Deb<br />

Morin<br />

Linda<br />

Dupuis<br />

Dustin<br />

Mallar<br />

Mason<br />

Dupuis<br />

Lindsay<br />

Wright<br />

Malayka<br />

Harriman<br />

Brandon<br />

Duarte<br />

Bryan O’Leary<br />

That’s why we bring health care to you.<br />

Skilled medical care in the comfort of your own home<br />

Recovery from illness or injury<br />

Chronic condition management<br />

Navigating emotional wellbeing<br />

Hospice care + Hospice House<br />

207.777.7740 | Androscoggin.org<br />

The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested. I hear they’re gonna give<br />

him a really tough sentence.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 7


Out and About at<br />

Fore a Cause Golf<br />

Tournament<br />

Summit Springs<br />

Golf Course<br />

& Mary's Irish Pub<br />

The<br />

best golf partners<br />

are the ones a bit worse<br />

than you!<br />

DON’T KNOW<br />

WHAT TO DO<br />

NEXT? WE DO. ®<br />

I, for one, like Roman numerals.<br />

For any disaster,<br />

call ServiceMaster!<br />

WATER FIRE MOLD<br />

Brian & Sam Landis<br />

29 Brickyard Circle,<br />

Auburn<br />

(800) 244-7630<br />

(207) 539-4452 www.smfireandwater.com • www.smcarpetcleaning.com<br />

I was playing chess with my friend and he said, ‘Let’s make this interesting’.<br />

So we stopped playing chess.<br />

Shauna Cummings &<br />

Peter Pacholski III<br />

Bruce Coffin<br />

& Scott Fennessy<br />

Thank you<br />

for a great<br />

season!<br />

1940 ~ 2022<br />

Our restaurant will<br />

close on <strong>September</strong><br />

10th. The mini golf<br />

& driving range will<br />

stay open through<br />

<strong>September</strong>!<br />

• Restaurant<br />

• Ice cream<br />

• Mini golf<br />

• Driving range<br />

Don O’Leary<br />

& Bryan Martin<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

8 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

470 Lake Shore Drive, Auburn • tabersgolf.com<br />

If I got 50 cents for every failed math exam, I’d have $ 6.30 now.


Are you tired of your website not generating the traffic, leads,<br />

and sales you were hoping for? You’re not alone. Many website<br />

owners struggle with the same issues, but few know the real<br />

reasons why their website is underperforming.<br />

In my newest book, “7 Reasons Your Website Sucks,” reveals the<br />

common mistakes website owners make and provides practical<br />

advice on how to fix them. With over a decade of experience<br />

in website design and optimization, I have helped countless<br />

businesses achieve online success.<br />

Whether you’re a small business owner, a marketer, or a web<br />

designer, this book will give you the insights and tools you need<br />

to improve your website and achieve your online goals.<br />

Get your copy of<br />

“7 REASONS YOUR<br />

WEBSITE SUCKS”<br />

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real results from your<br />

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Available now on<br />

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www.7reasonsyourwebsitesucks.com<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 9


Out and About at<br />

Summer<br />

Block Party<br />

Grand Finale<br />

at Mac’s Grill<br />

When I was younger I felt like a man trapped inside a woman’s body. Then I was born.<br />

Just good cookin’ and plenty of it!<br />

NOW AVAILABLE - ONLINE ORDERING<br />

Leif Erikson<br />

Thank<br />

you Jimbo! Face<br />

painting is in.<br />

L to R Denis Jean (D. L. Jean Excavation, Inc)<br />

Paul Gagne and Rick Cote<br />

Breakfast served all day<br />

87 Mill Street, New Auburn<br />

207-753-0171<br />

rollysnewauburn.com<br />

Monday-Saturday: 6a-2p • Closed Sunday<br />

I was at an ATM and this old lady asked me to help check her balance,<br />

so I pushed her over.<br />

Emerie Barker<br />

SCHOOL IS IN SESSION! DRIVE SAFE!<br />

Good luck to all of the<br />

students returning<br />

to school<br />

Have a great year!<br />

Samantha B.<br />

& Daniel Fecteau<br />

THE CHAMPOUX GROUP<br />

CHAMPOUX • PEOPLES • PINKHAM • ROGERS<br />

I N S U R A N C E<br />

Randy & Kelly Baril<br />

Peoples Insurance - Monmouth<br />

832 Main Street, Monmouth<br />

(207) 777-1877 or (888) 783-2246<br />

Pinkham Insurance<br />

8 Almar Street, Farmingdale<br />

(207) 626-5810 or (866) 626-5820<br />

...Your Security is Our Concern!<br />

Champoux Insurance Agency<br />

150 East Avenue, Lewiston<br />

(207) 783-2246<br />

(888) 783-2246<br />

Peoples Insurance - Ogunquit<br />

716 Main Street, Ogunquit<br />

(207) 646-7118 or (877) 840-7118<br />

Rogers Insurance<br />

38 Main Street, Lisbon Falls<br />

(207) 353-6834 or (888) 353-6833<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

10 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

A shark’s two most favorite words are man overboard!


Need cheering up? Start a fight with somebody when they have the hiccups.<br />

Providing a warm and comfortable<br />

home for our residents.<br />

Out and About at<br />

Summer<br />

Block Party<br />

Grand Finale<br />

at Mac’s Grill<br />

Lisa & Dan Carroll<br />

People are truly<br />

generous for this<br />

cause.<br />

The Chapman House<br />

Home for senior ladies<br />

Dave Purrington<br />

The Chapman House has private rooms available for residents,<br />

aged 65 and older, who need assistance with bathing,<br />

medications, and meals.<br />

Jeff Vallee<br />

41 Pleasant Street, Auburn | 207-783-0961<br />

Bonnie Iwans<br />

Steve Letourneau<br />

& Jen Benedix<br />

One in four frogs is a leap frog.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 11


Out and About at<br />

Summer<br />

Block Party<br />

Grand Finale<br />

at Mac’s Grill<br />

Went<br />

first in the<br />

dunk tank to set the<br />

bar high!<br />

How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas? He felt his presents.<br />

We ship chocolates anywhere<br />

in the country!<br />

• Whoopie Pies<br />

• Chocolates-custom orders & in-stock<br />

• Fresh homestyle breakfast & lunch<br />

• Gluten free options<br />

DID YOU HEAR!?<br />

Our Whoopie Pies are #1<br />

Stop by and see for yourself!<br />

FRIDAY SPECIAL<br />

French Toast Breakfast<br />

Buy One, Get One 50% OFF<br />

207-705-1866<br />

550 Center Street, Auburn Mall<br />

nuttynettieschocolate@gmail.com<br />

Jonathan LaBonte<br />

Darlene LaBonte<br />

47 Broad Street, Auburn<br />

www.firehouseauburn.com<br />

207-376-4959<br />

Monday - Saturday 11a-9p<br />

<strong>September</strong> Special<br />

You’ll Love<br />

our Daily<br />

Specials!<br />

$<br />

8<br />

Peach<br />

goddess<br />

BURGER MONDAY Get $2 off your burgers! (dine-in only) • WHISKEY WEDNESDAY $1 off whiskey<br />

We provide a roll-off can service!<br />

Scott Malcolm<br />

& Trisha Marston<br />

John Acker<br />

& Todd Yates<br />

BATTERY & CORE<br />

MAINE’S MOST<br />

TRUSTED RECYCLER<br />

Ask about our 20 yard<br />

cans! Perfect for demo,<br />

property clean up,<br />

& scrap metal.<br />

Call for availibility.<br />

We pay cash for scrap metal<br />

We buy insulated wire, copper pipe,<br />

aluminum wheels, Brass fittings, lead, steel & more.<br />

15 Pierce St. Auburn<br />

Open Mon. - Fri. 8a - 4p<br />

maine-recycling.com (207)795-8887<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

12 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

Oysters never donate to charity, they’re shellfish.


What’s the best part about living in Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.<br />

24 Hour<br />

Service<br />

PRO-TECH REFRIGERATION<br />

IS GROWING!<br />

We are seeking<br />

EXPERIENCED<br />

SERVICE<br />

TECHNICIANS<br />

& INSTALLERS<br />

to join our team!<br />

Out and About at<br />

Summer<br />

Block Party<br />

Grand Finale<br />

at Mac’s Grill<br />

Chet Waters<br />

235 N. River Road, Auburn<br />

207-777-5600<br />

www.pro-techrefrigeration.com<br />

protechoffice11@yahoo.com<br />

Now offering<br />

medical benefits!<br />

Fully Insured<br />

Air Conditioning & Heating<br />

Proudly serving Auburn, Lewiston,<br />

and the surrounding communities!<br />

Did you know the first French fries weren’t cooked in France? They were cooked in<br />

Greece!<br />

Terry Martin<br />

It's amazing that<br />

this event was able<br />

to grant 26 wishes!<br />

Jason Hall<br />

& Debra Rumery<br />

Donald Soper<br />

& Elizabeth Leblanc<br />

Action at the circus is in-tents.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 13


Out and About at<br />

Summer<br />

Block Party<br />

Grand Finale<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

May <strong>2023</strong><br />

at Mac’s Grill<br />

AD PROOF<br />

Hi Peggy,<br />

Please review your<br />

proof carefully. It will<br />

run as you see it if<br />

changes Kelly Lamont-Kinney are not<br />

received by<br />

April 24th<br />

Thank you!<br />

Contact Pam<br />

cell: 207-754-9494<br />

office 207-783-7039 Brian<br />

design@<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com<br />

& Debbie Lamont<br />

The fact that Head & Shoulders doesn’t have a body wash called<br />

‘Knees & Toes’ disappoints me.<br />

COOK UP A STORM. DURING A STORM.<br />

*Based on generator and load size.<br />

When a bad storm or utility outage knocks out power, a reliable<br />

KOHLER® generator keeps your lights on, your fridge cold and<br />

your house protected. And it can power your entire home.*<br />

So turn up the heat. No matter the weather, we’re with you.<br />

UAD May <strong>2023</strong> Page 22<br />

The pirate got seven C's on his report card.<br />

From engines to generators, we give the world power.<br />

*based on generator and load size.<br />

COOK UP A STORM.<br />

DURING A STORM.<br />

When a bad storm or utility outage<br />

knocks out power, a reliable KOHLER ®<br />

generator keeps your lights on, your<br />

fridge cold, and your house protected.<br />

And it can power your entire home.*<br />

So turn up the heat. No matter the<br />

weather, we’re with you.<br />

From engines to generators,<br />

we give the world power.<br />

Don’t let your boiler look like this<br />

Get your yearly boiler<br />

cleaning/servicing<br />

The<br />

bands rock... me<br />

to sleep!<br />

CLEANINGS ONLY<br />

220 .00*<br />

$<br />

220<br />

*Plus materials if needed<br />

Dealer Name<br />

City, State<br />

000.000.0000<br />

Website.com<br />

D E A L E R<br />

Hope and Georgia<br />

Lanza<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

14 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

<strong>2023</strong> Newspaper_KeepCooking_5x10.5.indd 1 12/13/22 3:36 PM<br />

CALL TODAY!<br />

207-754-4556<br />

DID YOU KNOW?<br />

Getting your domestic hot water from your boilers<br />

coil is the MOST EXPENSIVE way to get hot water!<br />

Ask about alternatives.<br />

There are two kinds of people in the world: those who can<br />

extrapolate from incomplete data.


HAS IT ALL<br />

Thank you to all the sponsors,<br />

donors, and attendees for making the<br />

benefiting<br />

an EPIC event, raising<br />

$<br />

187,000 and granting<br />

26 wishes to local kids!<br />

Your one-stop shop for:<br />

• Amazing food (eat in or take out)<br />

• Agency liquor store with beer cave<br />

• Lottery tickets<br />

• Redemption center<br />

207-345-5551<br />

23 Pleasant Street, Mechanic Falls • www.dadsplacemaine.com<br />

CATERING<br />

Full serve catering at the<br />

location of your choice.<br />

Book Your<br />

<strong>2023</strong><br />

Business<br />

Events<br />

Now!<br />

207-345-9009<br />

DadsPlaceCatering.com<br />

Dad’s Redemption Center<br />

REDEMPTION CENTER<br />

6 ¢<br />

on all 5¢ returns with this coupon.<br />

Located in the building behind Dad’s Place<br />

Hours: Wednesday - Sunday 9am - 5pm<br />

(closed Mondays, Tuesdays, & Major Holidays)<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

(must present coupon at Redemption Center prior to counting) <strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com UAD exp. 9.30.23 15


Out and About at<br />

Main Street<br />

Music Lessons<br />

A baby computer calls its father 'Data.'<br />

There<br />

is no instrument<br />

easy to play so I<br />

read <strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s<br />

<strong>Digest</strong>.<br />

Red Volkaert<br />

The Right<br />

Coverage at the<br />

Right Price.<br />

Discover insurance solutions from local industry experts<br />

dedicated to protecting your assets. From risk consulting<br />

to claims support, we’ve got you covered.<br />

John Blanchette, Sales Advisor | 207.784.9358<br />

john.blanchette@nfp.com<br />

Steve Grenier<br />

Copyright ©2022 NFP. All Rights Reserved.<br />

For your business.<br />

For your people.<br />

For your life.<br />

NFP.com<br />

Visit our new NFP office:<br />

681 Sabattus St | Lewiston, ME 04240<br />

Rick Grenier<br />

Scott Hayward Jr.<br />

Bringing the Ocean to your Table<br />

Party<br />

Platters<br />

Available<br />

(orders only)<br />

Take out • Dine in<br />

Homemade Goods<br />

Gift Certificates Available<br />

The freshest seafood around!<br />

Gray, ME<br />

Hours: Mon. 11a-5p • Tues.-Thurs. 11a-6p • Fri. 11a-7p • Sat. 10a-7p • Sun. 10a-5p<br />

WE HAVE<br />

LIVE<br />

LOBSTERS!<br />

Let us do the cooking!<br />

207-657-3474<br />

59c Portland Road, Gray<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

16 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.


A factory that sells generally decent goods is a satisfactory.<br />

Come see Kathy & Joe!<br />

Scan<br />

here to<br />

see our<br />

menu!<br />

Out and About at<br />

Main Street<br />

Music Lessons<br />

Order Online! Visit our website: stationgrillrestaurant.com<br />

Online Ordering<br />

Available!<br />

Now<br />

Hiring<br />

Wait<br />

staff!<br />

Outside Seating available<br />

Tuesday - Saturday: 7am-2pm • Sunday: 7am-3pm<br />

dinner: Thurs., Fri., & Sat. 4-8pm<br />

Check out our new night menu<br />

Try our Steaks<br />

and Seafood Casserole<br />

Bucky Mitchell<br />

& Denny Breau<br />

Play<br />

your best<br />

song & I’ll trump<br />

it!<br />

Adam Tardif<br />

Jerry Smith<br />

Now Available- NEW GIFT CARDS<br />

103 Lincoln Street, Lewiston<br />

207-333-5062<br />

Lin Prescott<br />

& Connie Grenier<br />

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 17


Out and About at<br />

Summer<br />

Block Party<br />

Grand Finale<br />

at Mac’s Grill<br />

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades<br />

Andrea Ross<br />

LA’s One & Only True Hibachi Experience!<br />

40 East Avenue, Lewiston | www.sea40me.com | 207-795-6888<br />

Fore A Cause Golf Tournament<br />

Terry &Vic Stacie<br />

Pam Lovely, Erwin Ward, & Pat Fry, (Missing from Photo) Kurt Lovely<br />

Laurie Swart<br />

WASHRITE LAUNDROMAT<br />

laundry done right<br />

Wash & Dry Service Available<br />

Steve Simard<br />

ATM<br />

Change Machine<br />

Soap Dispenser<br />

Waiting Area with TV<br />

Folding Stations<br />

77 Sabattus St. Lewiston<br />

All New<br />

Machines<br />

*CLEAN*<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

18 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

The older I get, the earlier it gets late.


They’ve just opened a new restaurant Downtown. It’s called Karma and they don’t<br />

have a menu. You just get what you deserve.<br />

THE AMERICAN LEGION<br />

FAMILY<br />

RED SHIRT FRIDAYS: Wear your red shirt on Fridays<br />

and get a surprise!<br />

“SEE YOU AT THE POST!”<br />

Members & Guests Welcome!<br />

AMERICAN LEGION ACT<br />

Veterans who were honorably discharged<br />

but whose service did not fall into previously<br />

defined war eras may now join<br />

the American Legion immediately. The<br />

eligibility now spans from Dec. 7, 1941,<br />

until a time when the U.S. is no longer at<br />

war, as determined by Congress.<br />

RED SHIRT FRIDAYS: Wear your red shirt on<br />

Fridays and get a surprise! “SEE YOU AT THE POST!”<br />

For Veteran or Community services, call<br />

207-782-1118 or 207-873-3229<br />

Hall Rentals Available<br />

Call for more<br />

information<br />

207-782-1118<br />

71 South Main St, Auburn • 207-782-1118<br />

HOURS: Monday - Thursday: 12pm-8pm • Friday: 12pm-11pm<br />

Saturday: 12pm-9pm • Sunday: 11am-6pm<br />

MUSIC, KARAOKE & DANCE w/ JEAN LOUIS<br />

FRIDAYS 7-11pm in August<br />

Jerry Joe - <strong>September</strong> 8th & 22nd • 7 - 11pm<br />

BREAKFAST BUFFET | SUNDAY SEPTEMBER 17TH, 8-10AM<br />

Scrambled eggs, sausage, gravy, bacon,baked beans, fried potatoes, crepes, toast,<br />

creton, juices, and coffee - Adults $10 Kids under 10 $5<br />

VOLUNTEERS NEEDED<br />

Androscoggin Home Healthcare & Hospice, volunteer dept. is<br />

looking is looking for volunteers to assist our Veterans with<br />

pinning services. Must be a Veteran - willing to travel, be reliable<br />

& dependable. see notice on board at post for contract info,<br />

or email volunteer@androscoggin.org<br />

DINNERS ARE BACK<br />

Saturday, Sept. 30th, 4-6pm<br />

Lobster roll with fries & cole slaw $15<br />

Or 2 lobster rolls for $27<br />

Also: Chicken tenders with fries & cole slaw for $8<br />

MONTHLY MEETING WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 20 TH<br />

EXECTUTIVE COMMITTEE 6:30PM GENERAL MEMBERSHIP 7PM<br />

Legion Members attending have a chance to win $100, $50, or $25<br />

A police recruit was asked during his exam, “What would you do if you had to arrest your<br />

own mother?” He answered, “Call for backup.”<br />

Out and About at<br />

Summer<br />

Block Party<br />

Grand Finale<br />

at Mac’s Grill<br />

Marci & Mike Jouver<br />

Brian Girouard<br />

& Brenda Keene<br />

I'm<br />

glad I didn't<br />

miss this!<br />

Carrie Laroche<br />

& Laurie Plourda<br />

Stephanie Stevens<br />

I started with nothing and I’ve still got most of it.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 19


Out and About at<br />

Fore a Cause Golf<br />

Tournament<br />

Summit Springs<br />

Golf Course<br />

& Mary's Irish Pub<br />

You say you’re a compulsive liar but I don’t believe you.<br />

EVENT<br />

SERIES <strong>2023</strong>-24<br />

La Rencontre<br />

Marc Mailhot<br />

Thursday, Sept. 7<br />

WEDDINGS<br />

Call Caitlyn<br />

207-333-3251<br />

Alan, & Laurie Chute<br />

Dan Cobb<br />

Kendall Dean<br />

Concert<br />

Saturday, Sept. 16<br />

MSO & Friends<br />

Concert Fundraiser<br />

Sunday, Sept. 10<br />

Davidson County<br />

Line Band<br />

Saturday, Sept. 30<br />

CONCERTS<br />

Call Jake<br />

207-514-7753<br />

DONATIONS<br />

Call Penny<br />

207-514-7477<br />

TOURS<br />

Call Denise<br />

207-261-5240<br />

Benny LaPrise<br />

& Nick Page<br />

Tyler & Bill Curtis<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

20 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

Books & Stories Wednesdays at Noon<br />

FREE<br />

Admission<br />

Sept. 13: Suzanne Roy<br />

Sept. 27: David Vermette<br />

Oct. 4: Paul Dionne<br />

TICKETS Call Susan<br />

207-689-2000<br />

46 Cedar Street, Lewiston<br />

www.francocenter.org<br />

Since I had my neck-brace fitted I’ve never looked back.


Muriel celebrated...<br />

Nothing tops plain pizza.<br />

Muriel is her always 90th ready birthday for with a party! us Come<br />

celebrate and can't with wait us, for we the have next availability party!<br />

starting at $1500 per month!<br />

The Meadows<br />

“Maine’s Most Affordable Senior Living Center”<br />

Out and About at<br />

Fore a Cause Golf<br />

Tournament<br />

Summit Springs<br />

Golf Course<br />

& Mary's Irish Pub<br />

#433 RT. 202, P.O. BOX 629, GREENE • 946-3007<br />

Bob Handville<br />

& Jackie Bennett<br />

We have bow hunting gear - Visit us!<br />

Sue McDaniel<br />

& Don McDaniel<br />

Cross bows • Deer calls • camo gear • lots more<br />

186 Sabattus Road, Sabattus, ME (207) 375-6253 - 2 Miles Off I-95 Exit 86 Family Owned & operated<br />

Hours<br />

Mon.-Fri. 9am-8pm Sat. & Sun. 9am-3pm<br />

Massage, facials and body treatments<br />

Bonnie Iwans<br />

(Chapman House)<br />

& Stephanie Arsenault<br />

(<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong>)<br />

Start<br />

your engines! Ah<br />

oops. Wrong Sport.<br />

Join our monthly membership for free<br />

11 Mechanic Falls Rd. Oxford, Maine<br />

essencewellnessspa.com 207-539-5128<br />

Bunny Keegan<br />

A dyslexic guy walks into a bra.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 21


Out and About at<br />

Summer<br />

Block Party<br />

Grand Finale<br />

at Mac’s Grill<br />

Gary<br />

& Karen LaBonte<br />

You can’t lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon fails to return home then what<br />

you’ve actually lost is a pigeon.<br />

We are<br />

looking for<br />

new crew<br />

mates!<br />

Servers, Bartenders,<br />

Kitchen positions<br />

available<br />

If you have the skills<br />

you want to show off,<br />

come down<br />

& sail with us!<br />

Fall is coming, warm your self up with<br />

one of our hardy hot meals<br />

The Village Inn<br />

165 High Street, Auburn villageinnmaine.com Open Wed.-Sun.<br />

Check out our<br />

• Weekly specials<br />

• The Port Side Lounge<br />

• The Captain’s Room<br />

• The Skylight Room<br />

Our menu has<br />

something<br />

everyone can<br />

enjoy<br />

We have more than<br />

seafood!<br />

Our prime rib & chicken<br />

parm are fan favorites.<br />

You won’t leave hungry!<br />

Bryan Cassidy<br />

HAPPY HOUR<br />

4-6PM DAILY<br />

SUNDAYS<br />

Bloody Marys<br />

check our<br />

FB page for<br />

ticket info<br />

SATURDAY SEPT. 16TH<br />

24th Annual Pig Roast<br />

With Christie Ray Trio<br />

Make our favorite place, your favorite place!<br />

Saturday Sept. 23rd<br />

7-11pm<br />

Black Cat Road<br />

Saturday Sept. 30th<br />

7-11pm<br />

Wingin It<br />

97-99 Ash St., Lewiston | 207.783.0668 | Open 7 days 10a - close<br />

Janet Cassidy<br />

Congratulations<br />

on a great day for<br />

Make-A-Wish.<br />

Check out our in-store Weekly Ad for our <strong>2023</strong> specials!<br />

Roy’s<br />

FOODLAND<br />

Get your<br />

BBQ meats<br />

here<br />

Best Chicken &<br />

Ham Salad<br />

IN THE WORLD!<br />

Try our hamburger,<br />

it’s the best!<br />

Bob Raymond<br />

SATURDAY<br />

Beans, bread/rolls &<br />

cole slaw<br />

$11.99<br />

WEDNESDAY<br />

Ham, Veggie, Salami,<br />

or Pepperoni Italians<br />

$3.49<br />

PIZZA PACKS<br />

Pizza<br />

Packs<br />

$12.99<br />

Beanie Babies<br />

on Sale Here!<br />

70 Broad Street, Auburn • 207-783-8471<br />

www.ShopAtRoysFoodland.com<br />

Mon.-Thurs. 8am-6pm • Fri. 8am-7pm • Sat. 8am-6pm • Sun. Closed<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

22 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

Dad, are we pyromaniacs? Yes, we arson.


I love to hold hands at the movies but for some reason, strangers sitting next<br />

to me never seem that keen.<br />

CAMPING SEASON IS Here!<br />

Are you ready?<br />

Poisson & Sons Auto Care<br />

260 S. Main Street, Auburn 207.782.9144<br />

FULL SERVICE GAS STATION<br />

<strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

Stickers are due!<br />

CALL OF THE WILD RV CENTER<br />

848 Main Street, Oxford<br />

207-539-4410 • www.callofthewildrv.com<br />

We love the digest<br />

We Hope you love our friendly service<br />

BRING Home Cooking HOME<br />

207-783-0000783-0000<br />

corporateintelligenceinc.comtelligenceinc.com<br />

Offering homemade meals,<br />

snacks, and treats to eat-in<br />

or take home.<br />

~ fresh or frozen ~<br />

~ single or family-size ~<br />

meals • soups • salads • desserts<br />

7 main st., gray | 657.1092 | twomumskitchen.com<br />

• Decks, sheds<br />

• Basement remodels<br />

• Light Carpentry<br />

• Plowing & Sanding<br />

• Fully Insured<br />

Commercial & Residential<br />

Joe Scammon<br />

207.402.1330<br />

Serving 24 flavors of<br />

Soft Serve Ice Cream<br />

Open Thurs.-Sun. 10a-5p<br />

Shuga Shak Country Store<br />

Now selling lobster<br />

live or cooked<br />

Lobster Rolls<br />

Maple Baked Beans<br />

every Saturday!<br />

Wine • Local Products<br />

Honey • Pickles<br />

• Jams Candies •<br />

Crafts...<br />

and much more!<br />

450 Pigeon Hill Road<br />

(Rte 26), Mechanic Falls<br />

207-576-7886<br />

MAINE GOURMET CHOCOLATES<br />

Always FREE samples for tasting!<br />

Where the faces are<br />

always friendly<br />

and you never leave<br />

hungry.<br />

85 Center Street, Auburn | 207-784-8221 | 11a-9p daily<br />

Visit us at Maine Needham Festival!<br />

Saturday Sept. 30<br />

At Maine Tasting Center, Wiscasset<br />

Celebrating the first annual Needham Day<br />

168 Main St. Auburn 207.783.8472<br />

mainegourmetchocolates.com<br />

Seven days of fasting will make one weak.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 23


Thank you to all our<br />

& Thank you to Everyone who came to<br />

the Summer Block Party Grand finale!<br />

Money Raised<br />

UNCLE ANDY’S DIGEST<br />

presents<br />

$<br />

187<br />

Thousand<br />

Wishes<br />

granted<br />

26<br />

hosted by<br />

Thank you to everyone<br />

who supported and made<br />

this event possible. The Grand<br />

Finale truly was a special<br />

moment in time!<br />

<strong>2023</strong><br />

Media Partners:<br />

LASummerBlockParty.com<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

24 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong>


amazing sponsors!<br />

Akerman<br />

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OUR AMAZING SPONSORS!<br />

Wish Sponsors<br />

Sponsors of Hope<br />

Alternative Sprinkler<br />

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Star Sponsors<br />

Community<br />

Sponsors:<br />

290 Main St.<br />

Auburn Savings Bank<br />

DuBois Realty Group<br />

Fortin Funeral Homes<br />

Bancroft Contracting<br />

Bilodeau Insurance<br />

Cliff Hammond<br />

CN Brown<br />

Firehouse Subs<br />

Georges Pizza<br />

Hahnel Bros<br />

Kristi’s Cafe<br />

Lee Auto Mall<br />

Lisa Laliberte<br />

State Farm<br />

Paradie, Rabasco<br />

& Seasonwein<br />

Rowe Auburn<br />

Spruce Bay Farm<br />

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Whited Equipment Co.<br />

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THE CHAMPOUX GROUP<br />

CHAMPOUX • PEOPLES • PINKHAM • ROGERS<br />

I N S U R A N C E<br />

...Your Security is Our Concern!<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 25


Out and About at<br />

Fore a Cause Golf<br />

Tournament<br />

Summit Springs<br />

Golf Course<br />

& Mary's Irish Pub<br />

What do you call a hippy’s wife? Mississippi.<br />

We<br />

love this<br />

tournament’s players<br />

& volunteers.<br />

Tatiana Guzman<br />

& Kyla Patten<br />

(Bartenders)<br />

Book Your Music Lessons Now!<br />

• Guitar • Piano • Violin • Voice<br />

• Banjo • Mandolin • Viola • Ukulele<br />

• Brass & Woodwinds • Cello • Bass<br />

We also sell and service all types of instruments.<br />

Main Street Music Lessons<br />

207-376-3376<br />

ANDROSCOGGIN COUNTY’S<br />

MUSIC HEADQUARTERS<br />

33 Dunn Street, Auburn • www.mainstreetmusiclessons.com<br />

G<br />

PAINTING & DRYWALL<br />

COMMERCIAL & RESIDENTIAL<br />

Michael Giambra<br />

G<br />

&<br />

207-754-9798<br />

giambra34@gmail.com<br />

Daily Specials<br />

Now Hiring!<br />

Live music<br />

Follow us on Facebook<br />

675 Main St. Lewiston | 207.753.1446<br />

Amy St. Hilaire<br />

Marketing Specialist<br />

207.402.1070<br />

amy@<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com<br />

9 Grove Street,<br />

Auburn, ME 04210<br />

Office:<br />

207-783-7039<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

26 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

I wanted to be a monk but I never got the chants.


I tried eating a clock but it was time-consuming.<br />

ALL-STAR CLUB W/ FRIES<br />

& COLESLAW<br />

BLT with your choice of Ham, Turkey, or Chicken<br />

Take Out<br />

Available!<br />

207-782-2135 Auburn Mall<br />

Tues. - Wed., 11am - 7pm • Thurs. - Sat. 11am - 8pm • Sun. 11am - 5pm<br />

DAILY SPECIALS<br />

MONDAY - CLOSED<br />

Fried Pickle Basket<br />

Thatcher’s Burger<br />

25oz domestic drafts<br />

3 Beef Tacos<br />

Thatcher’s Burrito<br />

Well Margaritas • Coronas<br />

SATURDAY<br />

Stuffed Peppers<br />

Buffalo Chicken Salad<br />

Microbrews<br />

FRIDAY<br />

Clam Cake Basket<br />

Fish & Chips<br />

2 Hot Dogs w/fries<br />

Miller Lite Bottles<br />

SUNDAY<br />

TUESDAY<br />

WEDNESDAY<br />

THURSDAY<br />

12" Cheese Pizza<br />

Bloody Mary’s<br />

Domestic Light/Lite Drafts<br />

Out and About at<br />

Main Street<br />

Music Lessons<br />

Michael Fox<br />

& Chris Chessey<br />

Kris Beaudoin<br />

Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators? Because it lifts their spirits.<br />

Justin Knowles<br />

Scott Hayward Jr.<br />

Deborah Percy<br />

Auto-correct makes me say things I didn’t Nintendo.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 27


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Warranty*<br />

A $695 Value!<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

28 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

Call today and receive a<br />

Dead batteries cost nothing. They’re free of charge.<br />

SPECIAL OFFER


BUSINESS<br />

SP TLIGHT<br />

207.577.6484<br />

528 Lincoln Street<br />

Lewiston<br />

Pooper Scooping Services<br />

Let us scoop the poop<br />

before the leaves fall!<br />

We can help!<br />

We scoop so you don’t have to!<br />

207-713-1550<br />

Androscoggin<br />

PET SITTING<br />

Call today!<br />

207.712.2765<br />

androscogginpetsitting@gmail.com<br />

andropetsit.com<br />

Richard Moylan<br />

(207) 777-0050<br />

791 Kittyhawk Ave. Unit 5, Auburn<br />

richardmoylan@allstate.com<br />

Insurance and coverages subject to terms.<br />

qualifications and availability. Allstate Property<br />

and Casualty Insurance Company, Allstate Fire<br />

and Casualty Insurance Company: Northbrook,<br />

Illinois © 2010 Allstate Insurance Company<br />

207-782-7141<br />

EAT IN OR TAKE OUT<br />

WATER TO WINE - NO<br />

PIZZA TO BREAKFAST - YES<br />

207-782-7141<br />

Out and About at Fore A Cause Golf Tournament<br />

Me<br />

watching my<br />

friends’ round<br />

fall apart.<br />

Johannah Galgovitch, Karen Tibbets, & Paula Staples<br />

Michele Wagner<br />

The girl in the middle of the tennis court is Annette.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 29


CALL THE PROS<br />

SERVICES OFFERED<br />

Aluminum<br />

Wood<br />

Vinyl<br />

Chain-link<br />

Ornamental<br />

Electric gates<br />

Decks, railings & more<br />

hopkinsfencingandcarpentry@gmail.com<br />

FINE LINE GUN SHOP<br />

Guns • Ammo • Supplies<br />

Ralph & Mary Sleeper<br />

Follow us on<br />

207-998-2374<br />

finelinegun@aol.com<br />

Professional<br />

Cleaning Service<br />

Residential<br />

Commercial<br />

Windows<br />

Floors<br />

Hunting<br />

season is<br />

near!<br />

Come see<br />

us today!<br />

590 Plains Road, Poland<br />

207-712-2765 realcleanllc.com Serving Maine<br />

OFFERING<br />

Residential<br />

Commercial<br />

Clean Outs<br />

Roll Offs<br />

FULL COLOR COPIES & MORE!<br />

Posters • Booklets • Carbonless forms<br />

Envelopes • Business Cards & More!<br />

60 Broad Street, Auburn<br />

207-782-0525 • evergreencustomprinting.com<br />

Call Today for a Free Quote!<br />

844-ME-TRASH<br />

844-638-7274<br />

The only thing we don’t throw away is our customer service!<br />

SERVING<br />

Oxford Hills • Lewiston/Auburn• McFalls/Minot/Poland<br />

Bridgton/Denmark • Raymond/Naples<br />

9 Marston St. Norway, Ste.3 • TiceWasteManagement.com<br />

Office & Light Industrial Cleaning Services<br />

Mike Magretto<br />

Veteran Owned & Operated<br />

EmeraldJanitorialServices.com 207-530-8890<br />

Accounting<br />

& Tax<br />

Service You<br />

Can Trust!<br />

MICHAEL G. SPAULDING, P.A.<br />

Certified Public Accountant<br />

Tax Planning & Preparation<br />

for Individuals and Business<br />

207.782.1040 • PO Box 895, Auburn, ME 04212<br />

mspaulding@androscoggin.tax<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

30 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

I will start collecting highlighting pens. Mark my words.


CALL THE PROS<br />

Call<br />

for your<br />

FREE QUOTE<br />

Today!<br />

Your Vision.<br />

Our Expertise.<br />

Kitchens, Baths,<br />

Decks, & More!<br />

FALL ONTO OUR TABLE<br />

Massage can boost your immunity<br />

& helps you get a better nights sleep.<br />

Call to<br />

book your<br />

personalized<br />

treatment!<br />

RON’S<br />

TRANSMISSION REPAIR SERVICE<br />

YOUR FULL SERVICE<br />

REPAIR FACILITY<br />

VEHICLE MAINTENANCE<br />

CHECKS DONE HERE<br />

375-4924<br />

515 Gardiner Rd. Wales<br />

207-212-7791<br />

www.vghomeimprovements.com<br />

We Specialize in domestic car & truck,<br />

automatic & manual transmissions,<br />

transfer cases & Differentials.<br />

Ron<br />

Charpentier, Jr.,<br />

Owner<br />

Mon., Wed., Fri. 11a-7p • Thu. 9a-7p • Sat. 12p-5p<br />

Add 4 Months to Your Watersports<br />

Season with a Wetsuit<br />

• Swimming<br />

• Snorkeling<br />

• Scuba<br />

• Water-ski<br />

We can help you<br />

stay warmer longer!<br />

229 Center Street, Auburn<br />

(207) 402-8654<br />

www.lamassagemaine.com<br />

CHILDRENS<br />

TOO!<br />

805 Main Street<br />

Lewiston<br />

784-7300<br />

Specializing in Heat Pumps/AC, Oil & Gas Furnace<br />

Don’t Get<br />

Caught In<br />

The Cold<br />

Free<br />

Quotes!<br />

Ryan Queen • hvacsolutions207@gmail.com<br />

Kids are back to<br />

school. Stay alert,<br />

drive safely and<br />

keep our kids safe!<br />

Coach Terry’s<br />

REDEMPTION<br />

CENTER<br />

The friendly redemption center<br />

8 Tidswell Road Turner<br />

207-225-2008<br />

Open daily 8am to 4pm<br />

Our experienced professional<br />

technicians can help!<br />

Have a unique radiator or engine problem?<br />

Unique fixes are our Specialty!<br />

Lincoln Street<br />

RADIATOR SHOP<br />

Family owned & operated since 1967<br />

207-784-9356<br />

1522 Lisbon Street, Lewiston<br />

Monday-Friday: 8a-5p<br />

Serving Greater Central Maine<br />

Ensuring<br />

Your Home<br />

is a Safe Place<br />

RICK BROWNING<br />

Certified Inspector<br />

207-619-0868<br />

upfronthi@gmail.com<br />

I never finish anything. I have a black belt in partial arts.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 31


Welcome<br />

Photo Finish<br />

& Creativeone’s<br />

Photography<br />

to the Lewiston<br />

Auburn<br />

Metropolitan<br />

Chamber of<br />

Commerce<br />

My dogs are called Rolex and Breitling. They’re watchdogs.<br />

Out and About at Summer Block Party Grand Finale at Mac's Grill<br />

Fire in the Hole<br />

Before<br />

After<br />

Photo Finish is located<br />

at the Auburn Mall<br />

where we ‘’Make your<br />

family’s moments last<br />

a lifetime!’’<br />

We transfer 8mm<br />

films and videos to<br />

DVD or digital. Old<br />

slides, negatives and<br />

photos can be preserved<br />

and repaired<br />

from our archival and<br />

restorational department.<br />

We are a complete<br />

photo lab and prints<br />

can be ordered from<br />

our website, from<br />

your smartphone,<br />

tablet or computer.<br />

Visit them online<br />

MainePhotoFinish.com<br />

or call 207-783-3394<br />

Sue Marston, Larry Roy, Annette & Aaron Buccheri<br />

of Nutty Netties, & Pam Ashby<br />

I heard my shirt<br />

design was<br />

the runner-up<br />

for this event.<br />

Auburn Mayor, Jason Levesque<br />

Make-A-Wish recipient<br />

Alicia Fournier<br />

Makenna Campbell & Izzy Pray<br />

from The Smoothie Spot<br />

AFD, Matt Fifield<br />

Are you a new member<br />

of the Chamber? Call<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s today for<br />

a FREE Press Release in<br />

our next issue! 783-7039<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> <strong>Andy's</strong><br />

offfice dog, Lydia<br />

making friends<br />

Tattooed Lies<br />

Steve Grenier of Fire in the<br />

Hole & Main Street Music<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

32 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

I pulled a muscle digging for gold. It was just a miner injury.


The pizza man uses Little Caesars cut his hair.<br />

Casa<br />

Taco<br />

Del<br />

32 Riverside Drive, Auburn<br />

CATERING<br />

• Dinner parties<br />

• Weddings<br />

• Family gatherings<br />

• Corporate lunches<br />

Call us today!<br />

207.754.5417<br />

Out and About at<br />

Fore a Cause Golf<br />

Tournament<br />

Summit Springs<br />

Golf Course<br />

& Mary's Irish Pub<br />

Carol Roth<br />

& Paulette Tabb<br />

Barb Bishop<br />

& Jennifer Zanca<br />

Is<br />

Michele talking<br />

about us, Chris?<br />

(pg. 29)<br />

RoySnow.com<br />

207.782.3734<br />

Serving Maine since 1947<br />

11 Library Ave.<br />

Auburn<br />

Eligible for Medicare?<br />

CALL US TODAY<br />

to see which Medicare health plan best fits your needs.<br />

Chris Delamater<br />

& Matthew Colpitts<br />

30+<br />

Years of<br />

Experience!<br />

Visit us at 184 Webster Street, Lewiston<br />

Stacie Field<br />

& Jess Madsen<br />

What do you call a cow that can’t give milk? An udder failure.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 33


Out and About at<br />

Fore a Cause Golf<br />

Tournament<br />

Summit Springs<br />

Golf Course<br />

& Mary's Irish Pub<br />

Lad & Edie Taylor<br />

Water’s heavier than Butane because Butane is a lighter fluid.<br />

FULL SERVICE &<br />

REPAIR SHOP<br />

Heavy Duty Truck &<br />

Equipment Repairs<br />

State Inspection Station<br />

Commercial & Motor Vehicle Stickers<br />

Appointment Only<br />

207.784.8293<br />

250 Broad Street, Auburn<br />

Auburn Community Concert<br />

At the great Falls plaza<br />

Cindy Reedy<br />

& Brad Cummings<br />

What<br />

a fun time -<br />

Rain held off!<br />

Mark Radziszewski<br />

& Kyle Radziszewski<br />

Patrick Kuklinski<br />

& Rob Dwyer<br />

Poland Spring Golf Course<br />

& Mel’s Hilltop Restaurant<br />

Designed by Donald Ross, the golf course is an<br />

18-hole, par 71, championship layout. Enjoy velvet<br />

bent grass greens, well maintained fairways, and<br />

tees for all abilities. We also have a driving range,<br />

practice putting green, and golf school.<br />

Come enjoy the scenery and the great food at<br />

Mel’s Hilltop Restaurant before or after your<br />

round, or just to have fun!<br />

Call the Pro Shop at (207) 998-6002 for tee<br />

times and more information.<br />

www.PolandSpringResort.com<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

34 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong><br />

I started an online bakery but I accidentally deleted all my cookies.


When a wolf is taught to meditate, does it become aware wolf?<br />

Dale Lane has been a cornerstone of our team since the<br />

inception of Roopers Beverage and Redemption's Oxford store<br />

in 2018. Her unwavering dedication and tireless work ethic<br />

have been instrumental in our store's success. Dale's exemplary<br />

customer service and ability to consistently go above and<br />

beyond have earned her the respect of her colleagues and set<br />

a standard for excellence. We are grateful for her ongoing<br />

contributions and look forward to many more years of<br />

outstanding service.<br />

RoopersBeverage.com<br />

Cashier at Main St - Oxford Roopers<br />

Dale Lane<br />

Jesse St Laurent, President here at Roopers writes: “Dale has<br />

been such a pillar of reliability and dedication to our Roopers<br />

Oxford store. Being the longest-tenured employee in Oxford,<br />

Dale has seen many changes in personnel and business. Always<br />

being honest and sincere we are truly blessed to have such a<br />

great human being!! She always has a smile and a quick witty<br />

comment. She has made our lives easier and the store more<br />

enjoyable and successful with each day she spends with staff<br />

and our customers!! Proud of you Dale!! Congrats!!”<br />

Roopers would like to thank Dale for her dedication and service.<br />

Thanks for being such an integral part of our team Dale, we<br />

appreciate YOU!<br />

980 Main Street, Oxford |539.6072<br />

1420 Lisbon Street, Lewiston |333.3095<br />

794 Sabattus Street, Lewiston | 783.6353<br />

686 Main Street, Lewiston | 344.1200<br />

301 Main Street, Auburn | 783.9098<br />

545 Minot Ave, Auburn | 783.2047<br />

Follow us on<br />

Physical, speech, and<br />

occupational therapy services.<br />

Care & Comfort in your own home or our office.<br />

Home Support<br />

Physical, Speech, &<br />

Occupational Therapy<br />

368 Minot Avenue, Suite 3, Auburn<br />

Phone: 207-333-5022 • Fax: 207-333-5089<br />

Cell: 207-513-2279 • Email: davispt2019@icloud.com<br />

Lego store re-opens after lock down. People stand in line for blocks.<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 35


Hey Readers!<br />

Tell our advertisers you saw them in <strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong>!<br />

207-783-7039 | Stay tuned for an announcement on a new office location<br />

Check out just one of my reviews...<br />

Looking to Buy or Sell? I look forward to working with you NEXT.<br />

“WE WERE SO FORTUNATE TO FIND CINDY! After an initial fiasco with another very<br />

popular realtor Cindy Powell was recommended highly and she completely fit the bill! She<br />

always came prepared with a wealth of relevant information, she fielded all of our questions<br />

with patience, she was consistently timely and professional, she was able to make superb<br />

recommendations on other services we required and she stayed in touch without us ever needing<br />

to think about it.” — Caren Louise, June <strong>2023</strong><br />

RMS has joined the Guild Mortgage family<br />

We are stronger together<br />

Debbie Bodwell<br />

NMLS# 280336<br />

Debbie.Bodwell@guildmortgage.net<br />

181 Center Street, Auburn, ME 04210<br />

207.754.3962<br />

I am authorized to do business in the states of Maine, North Carolina, South Carolina and Virginia. (www.nmlsconsumeraccess.org)<br />

Guild Mortgage Company; NMLS #3274; Equal Housing Opportunity; www.nmlsconsumeraccess.org.<br />

Your local guide to... well, just about anything!<br />

<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />

UNCLEANDYS.COM<br />

36 <strong>September</strong> <strong>2023</strong>

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