Lot's Wife Edition 1 2017

How To Be The Best ‘Modern Man’ You Can Be
edition one
Men. Lads. Fellas. Boys. Blokes. Mates. However you salute your fellow man. It feels like the pressure on us
to be gentleman with the women and down at the pub with our mates is ever increasing. But of course, we are up
to the challenge. After having mulled on what we have to do to conquer our critics, I wanted to help out blokes
experiencing the same questions. This is how I wrote out this list, and reckon it’ll serve some of you well. Life is
all about sticking up for your mates. Your mum, girlfriend, brothers and mates will thank you for sticking to these
core principles.
lot’s wife
Shake hands with everybody
Let’s be honest, there isn’t much better
than a good handshake. Part and parcel of
a good handshake is a firm, tight grip. The
‘shake’ shouldn’t be brief. I estimate that
the optimal time is about 7.8 seconds, and
nothing less. It is a display of power and
initiative. It’s even better if you initiate
the handshake. Now, there can never be
10.
too many handshakes per day. I advise
you to shake the hand of cab drivers, past
classmates you haven’t seen for 10 years,
and especially your girlfriend’s dad. It’ll be
sure to impress them, and it’ll show the
world your a man of action.
Hang out in big groups of other men
If you go out for a lads night, don’t go out
08.
with one or two of them. Go out with 8 or
more of them. There’s no better sight down
Swanston street on a Saturday night than
a group of serious, ready-to-party blokes
strutting down the street, taking up the
whole path. The women won’t be able to
resist – and that scrawny little guy walking
home from playing ‘Pokemon Go’ will wish
he was one of you. It is also imperative that
you don’t waste your man-power. Make sure
people know you’re in a group amongst your
mates. Yell loudly, and talk over bystanders.
Walk like you own the town.
Always pay for everything
09.
Money is pretty sweet. It lets us buy
Tommy Hilfiger clothes, grog and many
other great male-orientated things. Money
is power. That’s why when you go out on
a date, you have to pay for everything,
especially dinner and a movie (take ‘em to
either Will Ferrell-esque comedies or Steven
Seagal action movies). It sends a strong
signal to your girl that you are that man
able to take care of her. It doesn’t hurt to
be kind, and maybe you’ll get something in
return later. The same applies when you go
out with your mates- always shout them for
the first round. This shows them you’re an
indispensable member of the group. Even
better, you show them that you aren’t tight
with money- a real show of power.
Don’t be afraid to be stylish
One of the best things about the
07.
evolution of being a man is that there’s no
shame to pay attention to style. Having said
that, though, be careful of these ‘hipsters’
and never shop at Target. If you want to
be a presence wherever you are, a good
hairstyle is essential. Manbun, gelled-up
hair, whatever suits you. A good Tommy or
Ralphy shirt or polo is a must for any man
serious about impressing his mates and the
girls. Nice cologne (between $80 and $200)
will only help your chances when your out
there in the nightlife.