Lot's Wife Edition 1 2017

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Wot’s Life? With Agony Aunt edition one Agony Aunt and friends will be here all year to answer your anonymous questions. Q. What happens when you die? You’re reborn as a bug for asking such a shit question. Or you go to heaven, or to hell. Or you just cease to exist. Or maybe you just live in an urn above a mantle? Personally, I’d say that it depends on your own beliefs and no one has come back from the dead to tell me otherwise. A. Q. I have feelings for my cousin. What should I do? You should transfer to the University of Tasmania. If anything progresses it is incest to conceive a child so I suggest you adopt. But in Australia apparently it’s legal to marry first cousins. So whatever, I guess it’s fine. A. lot’s wife Q. I am attracted to my co-worker and he asked me out to dinner but I’m pretty sure he has a girlfriend. Firstly you don’t seem convinced that he has a girlfriend so probably just confirm that it’s true. Talk to him up front and see what he says. Or ya know, stalk his Facebook and Instagram and the respective girl’s A. Facebook and Instagram just to confirm if he does indeed have a girlfriend. You could always casually slip it into conversation? But odds are if he asked you out on a date he’s keen and maybe he has an open relationship or something or maybe he just wants to be friends. I suggest you clarify with him before you get more involved. Q. Do you have any suggestions or tips for taking sexy photos? I am a 22 year old girl but I have never done it before. I have just started seeing a guy and I want him to know what he’s missing out on when we can’t see each other as we both have busy work schedules. A. Personally, I suggest you keep your face out of it because what if he turns out to be a twat and shows lots of people, ya know? Or alternatively just gather blackmail material on him and go wild with your photos. But I feel like you can’t really go wrong with taking sexy photos, you’re literally sending them a pic of your boobs, they’re not allowed to complain and they have to love it regardless. Q. Q. My friends don’t want full communism A. like I do. Please help. Find new friends, you don’t need people like that in your life. O - Week is the time to branch out and A. to make new friends so make sure you go to as many events as you can and befriend as many people as you can because who knows, maybe they want full communism too! Q. If I’m wearing a choker, does that mean I like anal? According to memes (the highest source of authority there is) yes, but I’d like to see the empirical evidence behind it. It probably just means that you like chokers and accessorising your neck to be frank. A. Q. On a scale of 1 to 10, how much does it hurt losing your virginity? Guess you’ll just have to try it to find out but we’ll say a 4. But in all seriousness, I doubt that the first time is great for anyone and if they say it is they’re probably a liar. So don’t fret, it’ll probably be over in 40 seconds anyway. A. Read a few Cosmo articles to prepare yourself, I find Cosmo to be enlightening!
ADVERTISEMENT The Women’s Department is seeking contributions from writers and artists identifying as or with women for our magazine; DISSENT Please email submissions to msadissent17@gmail.com We look forward to hearing from you! TUESDAY 14 MARCH Doors open from 9pm Lockout at 10pm $20 tickets Tickets available at monash.edu/summerfest or at the MSA Desk and Sir Johns Bar Full Moon Party is an 18+ event. Photo ID is required. Monash Student Association practices responsible service of alcohol. #MONASHSUMMER MONASH.EDU/SUMMERFEST
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SUMMER FIESTA INTERNATIONAL FOOD |
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Lot’s Wife Editors Emina Besirevi
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edition one Letters to the lot’s
Page 8 and 9: MONASH IS SMOKE-FREE Want to quit?
Page 10 and 11: edition one lot’s wife PRESIDENT
Page 12 and 13: edition one lot’s wife Orientatio
Page 14 and 15: edition one lot’s wife Clubs & So
Page 16 and 17: A Medley Of Evil edition one In 197
Page 18 and 19: Unions Are Important: Analysing NUS
Page 20 and 21: MONASH SECURITY MONASH SECURITY INF
Page 22 and 23: Trump: A Nation Divided article by
Page 24 and 25: “If You’re Australian, Why Aren
Page 26 and 27: edition one lot’s wife
Page 28 and 29: Public Health: The Effect of Dating
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Page 32 and 33: Healthy Skepticism edition one lot
Page 34 and 35: Tips for The Everyday Science Stude
Page 36 and 37: Science News Monash Research Finds
Page 38 and 39: The Tension Between Artistic And Mo
Page 40 and 41: Artists Should Be Punished, Not Cel
Page 42 and 43: The Price Of Gaming edition one lot
Page 44 and 45: Disrupting The ‘White Cube’: Tw
Page 46 and 47: Why We Love Migos And Other Songs A
Page 48 and 49: How To Be The Best ‘Modern Man’
Page 50 and 51: Love Affair With Cinque Terre editi
Page 52 and 53: Burnt In Bali edition one No moistu
Page 54 and 55: Going Home: A Cycle Of Self Discove
Page 56 and 57: MS Word Enjoys Itself Oh, oh, oh, o
Page 60: BBQ @ 12PM, buses @ 1pm Lemon Scent
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