Lot's Wife Edition 1 2017

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MS Word Enjoys Itself Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh you’re reading this, are you? edition one Like properly? With words sounding off in your head and that tinny little voice going ringa-dinga-dinga if it sees it? Aha. Well, very nice then. Carry on. Oh, bugger you can’t. You need words to do that. Alright, alright just give me a minute and I’ll go and fetch them, yeah? Great, cheers. Oh, shit I’ve lost them. And they were bloody good I tell you, words so good you couldn’t even pronounce them, words like ‘phendrenamultimatchimier’. But real. But just as equally unpronouncable. Even in that head of yours. You didn’t think much of that, did you? No, didn’t think you’d be impressed. You know what? It’s fine, I’ll take another look alright, I’ll find the words, just give me - Whoa, Hey, Alright, here, here, here, what about this fella: “In the same exacting perfection as before, she had not aged a day” Now that’s a bloody good one that is. True romance in written form. All served up to you on a silver platter. Silver page. Well, that bit of the page was, we had to make cutbacks somewhere. But, as I’m sure you can see, we are still a journal of the highest quality, indeed, I would doff my cap to you if I could, and wish you a good day. Indeed, I have, just like that, you see? Lovely. You’re still here. I told you, I lost the words, I didn’t even find those last ones, I just made them up myself. The real words are gone. I’m sorry. Here now, here now, don’t be sad you see, just, well look, look at that: That’s a proper illustration and all what you’re seeing there, not often we get them in such high quality in these parts, I tell ya. No, no it’s all plain text this, and formatting that, with no regard to the pleasure of one such as yourself, ya see. But that sorta thing is what you came here for innit? Alright then, try with me, come on, give it a shot, and 3, 2, 1, And... Gah, thought that’d work, was hoping the words would find themselves, you see? Never have such luck I do, but I thought, maybe they’d come out for you. Come, come, lets try again, and - 3, 2, 1, Butsincethoulovest,lovestillandthrivetherein,EvenasIwouldwhenItolovebegin” Bugger me, that all came gushing out at once, didn’t it? Ahaha, we did it, oh, I knew we could do it you and I, look at that, words on a page. Maker and muse, you and me. Maker and muse. That’s real beauty that is. What we made there. The words always come to ya eventually. lot’s wife
True, they did come out in a bit of a deluge, but, you know what, it’s fine, it’s fine, we’ll sort it out now, alright, you stuck with me this far let’s just, just see what we can get here with a little – “But since thou lovest, love still and thive therein, even as I would when I to love begin” Mhm, Mhm, That’s the stuff. See what we can do when we take our time to think before we read? Just gorgeous. But ere, I can do one better – “But since thou lovest, love still and thrive therein, Even as I would when I to love begin” Formatting, ten out of ten. Just makes it that bit more readable, yeah. Oh, oh, oh, I’m sorry, this is actually probably a bit boring for you, isn’t it? Here then, you give it a shot, let me read something of yours. Seriously. Just put it, umm Just put it here: article by lachlan liesfield, illustrations by sian davies Nope, nothing? Come on, don’t be shy, show me some words, take whatever space you need, here, here, here, just chuck it: Ah. I see the problem. Alright, silly me, that’s, yep, that one’s on me. Alright, alright, here, just for you then, to say sorry (you must be so embarrassed!) I’ll do something exciting, see: “But since thou lovest, love still and thrive therein, Even as I would when I to love begin” Yeah. I know you’re impressed. They don’t call it Impact for nothing, right? Hey, hey, more fun coming up: I may have got a bit excited. creative/comedy 54-55
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SUMMER FIESTA INTERNATIONAL FOOD |
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Lot’s Wife Editors Emina Besirevi
Page 6 and 7: edition one Letters to the lot’s
Page 8 and 9: MONASH IS SMOKE-FREE Want to quit?
Page 10 and 11: edition one lot’s wife PRESIDENT
Page 12 and 13: edition one lot’s wife Orientatio
Page 14 and 15: edition one lot’s wife Clubs & So
Page 16 and 17: A Medley Of Evil edition one In 197
Page 18 and 19: Unions Are Important: Analysing NUS
Page 20 and 21: MONASH SECURITY MONASH SECURITY INF
Page 22 and 23: Trump: A Nation Divided article by
Page 24 and 25: “If You’re Australian, Why Aren
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Page 28 and 29: Public Health: The Effect of Dating
Page 30 and 31: edition one lot’s wife
Page 32 and 33: Healthy Skepticism edition one lot
Page 34 and 35: Tips for The Everyday Science Stude
Page 36 and 37: Science News Monash Research Finds
Page 38 and 39: The Tension Between Artistic And Mo
Page 40 and 41: Artists Should Be Punished, Not Cel
Page 42 and 43: The Price Of Gaming edition one lot
Page 44 and 45: Disrupting The ‘White Cube’: Tw
Page 46 and 47: Why We Love Migos And Other Songs A
Page 48 and 49: How To Be The Best ‘Modern Man’
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Page 54 and 55: Going Home: A Cycle Of Self Discove
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