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PLATFORM SPEAKING 115
had my first taste of platform speaking. It certainly
was an educative experience. If a young speaker breaks.
down, he is not likely to forget the humiliation and the
bitterness, as he has made himself rather ridicmlous in
presence of people who eare not whether he is ridiculous
or not. Moreover, his failure is due to self-consciousness,
whicll is, to some extent, a moral infirmity. Once I
was reduced to the terrible condition of sudden blankness of
hrain; a sensation as if the entire thinking faculty were
withdrawn from the organism. or, if present, were inhibited
somehow from acting, and the more violently it is called
upon to move and .assert itself and reeollect, the more it
seems to be petrified. Calamity, however, was averted
by the simple expedient of being provided with a bit of
paper eontaining the pencilled headings of the short speech.
The blankness was due to the failure of some joke. Nobody
langhed; all thought and memory vanished ; but by
glancing at the notes I was able to resume undetected.
Years ago I heard a vivid description of Gladstone over·
taken in the House of Commons by this nightmare. He
had just concluded a torrential tirade against Disraeli,
the last words oi which were " The right bon. gentleman
and his satellites." Pause ; cheering. More pause ; more
cheering : the situation was becoming intolerable, the
speaker being evidently helpless and in great distress ;
when Disraeli, ai'ter exactly the right amount of time,
rose and quietly said, " and his satellites 1 " thus giving
Gladstone exactly what was required to restore his self·
possession. Gladstone replied by a graceful tribute of
gratitude which in its turn was gradually modilled into
invective.
Herbert Gladstone was at home on the platform and
at his best when sharply heckled. On one occasion he
showed tact and resoUrce when an ugly row was brewing.
Four or five brainless but brawny larriklns pursued us to
the station-he and I were alone-intent upon fisticuffs.
One of them was a strapping chap and an affray on the
deserted platform wonld have been no joke against odds.