64 • DaystarConnect 2015
Thank you!! C<strong>our</strong>tesy brings forth a smile By Brenda Wambua I am Sorry! Excuse me! PLEASE!! “I have come for my assignment!” “I want to see you.” “You told me to see you today.” These are just a few of the opening statements faculty and staff hear when a student knocks on the office door. Introductions too are not part of the agenda of the visit. It is not unusual to see that puzzled look on the lecturer’s face as if to ask: “Who are you and what assignment are you talking about?” or “What did I tell you to see me about?” It is not that the lecturer is not interested in knowing his or her students but with three or f<strong>our</strong> classes of 40 or more students who need to pick their assignments. A good morning or good afternoon would do well in acquainting the student with faculty or staff but it rarely comes forth. It is surprising that students do not seem to see anything odd about using words such as, “I want”, “Give me”, “You told me…”. Sauntering into class 30 or 40 minutes late is common place in institutions of higher learning. What is shocking is the way a student will walk in as if it is just in order, interrupt the lecturer mid-sentence, no word of apology or explanation, walk to the back or to the front of the class (looking lost and distracting every other student), drag a chair and sit down comfortably. The shock on the lecturer’s face is evident. It is not unusual to see the same student, five minutes later, whip out his phone and begin swiping as if that is all what matters to him at the moment. When it comes to writing formal emails, the story is the same. Emails to staff and lecturers are characterized by: no subject, no salutation, sentences begin with small letters, words are abbreviated, no introduction, poor grammar, scanty details and much more. It is even worse when the student writes a text message. I think their assumption is that as a lecturer you know each student by name and telephone number. “Hae Madam/ Sir/Professor/Doctor”, “Pls excuse me from class today,” or “Hey. I will not be in class today. I am held up”, the text reads. Then the questions begin to do their rounds in my mind: who are you? Which class? Why not use official language? Why not write an email (which may just bear the same words, anyway)? What am I on about? I am talking about etiquette. I am talking about c<strong>our</strong>tesy. Good manners seem to have flown out the window, landed in the garbage bin and got trashed. According to Oxford Advanced Learners Dictionary, etiquette is the customary code of polite behavi<strong>our</strong> is society among members of a particular community. Etiquette is about polite behavior. Politeness is definitely not walking into class late and offering no apology. Politeness requires that you excuse y<strong>our</strong>self to the lecturer. In institutions of higher learning, students are prepared for the market place. No organisation gives room to its employees to walk into the office at leisure and go on as if nothing just happened. Such conduct could earn one summary dismissal even before the first salary is earned. Email etiquette requires that a student gets the email address right, gives the message a subject, greets the recipient of the message, writes out the messages according the conventions of correct grammar giving the necessary details and signs of clearly. A response to such an email will be imminent. Etiquette focuses on f<strong>our</strong> short phrases: “I am sorry!”, Please”, “Excuse me,” “Thanks”. Making use of these short phrases will calm some nerves. Whether written or spoken, these f<strong>our</strong> words have the power to melt even a heart of stone. Use them at home, at school, at work, in church and you will go far. It makes a big difference when you get into an office and say: “Good afternoon Sir. I am a so and so, a student in y<strong>our</strong> COM 415B class. Could you kindly give me my assignment?” Now that sounds like it. Instead of the puzzled look, there will be a smile. DaystarConnect 2015 • 65
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