HEALTHY FAMILIES FOR ETERNITY

makes some very important points about this
biblical directive:
Referring to the words used by Paul to the
Ephesians, Ellen White gives an example of how a
parent provokes her child:
We encourage you to spend time reading the
48th chapter of that book where Ellen White tells
us as parents not to be too harsh in the way we
discipline our children, not to continually censure
our children, not to be arbitrary with our course of
action, and much more.
SERMON
“Often we do more to provoke than to
win. I have seen a mother snatch from
the hand of her child something that
was giving it special pleasure. The child
did not know the reason for this, and
naturally felt abused. Then followed
a quarrel between parent and child,
and a sharp chastisement ended the
scene as far as outward appearance was
concerned; but that battle left an
impression on the tender mind that
would not be easily effaced. This mother
acted unwisely. She did not reason from
cause to effect. Her harsh, injudicious
action stirred the worst passions in
the heart of her child, and on every
similar occasion these passions would be
aroused and strengthened.”
White, 1954
Sometimes parents devote too much time
finding fault in their children for everything they do.
Listen to these words:
“You have no right to bring a gloomy
cloud over the happiness of your
children by faultfinding or severe
censure for trifling mistakes. Actual
wrong should be made to appear just
as sinful as it is, and a firm, decided
course should be pursued to prevent
its recurrence; yet children should
not be left in a hopeless state of
mind, but with a degree of courage
that they can improve and gain your
confidence and approval. Children
may wish to do right, they may purpose
in their hearts to be obedient; but
they need help and encouragement.”
White, 1954, p. 279
I love those words at the end: “Children may wish
to do right, they may purpose in their hearts to be
obedient; but they need help and encouragement.”
Conclusion
There are many more directives in the Bible to
teach us how we should relate to one another as
parents and children.
Today we only looked at four.
To children, the Bible says: “Honor your father
and your mother,” and “obey your parents.”
To parents, the Bible says: “Train your children,”
and “Don’t exasperate them.”
God desires that we may have good, healthy,
positive relationships with our children. He wants us
to reflect the relationship we have with Him.
[YOU CAN USE A STORY OF YOUR OWN OR
THE FOLLOWING ONE TO CONCLUDE THIS
SERMON]
A story is told of a man who came home from
work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old
son waiting for him at the door. Their conversation
went like this:
SON: “Daddy, may I ask you a question?”
DAD: “Yeah sure, what is it?” replied the man.
SON: “Daddy, how much do you make an
hour?”
DAD: “That’s none of your business. Why do you
ask such a thing?” the man said angrily.
SON: “I just want to know. Please tell me, how
much do you make an hour?”
DAD: “If you must know, I make 30 dollars an
hour.”
SON: “Oh,” the little boy replied, with his head
down.
SON: “Daddy, may I please borrow a dollar?”
The father was furious and with anger in his
voice he told his boy, “If the only reason you asked
that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly
toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself
straight to your room right this moment.”
17
GOD’S PLAN FOR PARENTS AND CHILDREN